# Feeling very down



## rachelha (Feb 25, 2010)

Hello all

I am having a very bad couple of days at the moment.  I just feel completely exhausted and overwhelmed with everything.  I went to bed at 8pm yesterday as I just needed to be by myself for a bit and OH keeps trying to see if I am alright (poor boy he can not do anything right at the mo).  I broke down at work today.  I got in at 9:50 (we have flexi time so I dont have to be in until 10am) but i had completely forgotten about a 9:30 meeting I was meant to be in.  

My boss asked me if I was ok later and I just started crying at her.  I am so stressed out about my blood sugar levels.  I feel guilty and worried about everything that I eat.  People keep telling me it is normal to worry about things when pregnant, but I am starting to wonder if combining diabetes and pregnancy was a wise move for me.  I regularly suffer from depression and anxiety and I am just not coping at the moment.  I am seeing a psychiatrist linked to the diabetic clinic and on prozac but it does not seem to be helping at the moment.

sorry for the whinge - just need to let it all out to people who actually understand.


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## Sugarbum (Feb 25, 2010)

Oh Rachel, sounds like so much to deal with. Can you take some time out from work if you have an understanding boss?

Hope you feel better, we all think you are wonderful, so keep chipping away at it. Lots of love xx


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## rossi_mac (Feb 25, 2010)

Sorry you're feeling down, maybe you could have a hot bath candles and all that jazz to chillax?? And have your wine quota in one big glass, or pretend it's wine when it's sugar free juice!?? Get the fella to perk you up, watch a favorite film, it's never easy when you're worrying about EVERYTHING, just  try and loosen up maybe?

Look after yourself, smile think of something funny and old memory/photo...

Rossi


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## Twitchy (Feb 25, 2010)

Hi Rachel, firstly a Big Hug to you!! (((()))).  It is really tough being diabetic & pregnant (both in terms of juggling doses etc etc & emotionally), and it's easy to get stressed about sugar levels...but you are doing really well and I'm sure everything will be fine!  The first few weeks & months I found really hard being hormonal, exhausted & stressed - honestly, it felt like having flu for weeks!!  The GOOD news is it goes get better!!   I know its very hard not to get stressed about sugar levels etc, but I think as long as they are not wildly bad (ie you spot & correct the highs & don't just run high all the time) & you're not having ketones all the time, baby should be fine.  Just please try & look after yourself - do take it easy, rest when you can & be gentle with yourself - I'll bet you are doing way better in terms of your control than you feel you are!  Could you do something nice this weekend to treat yourself?  Sounds like a bit of pampering is in order... 

All the best, and another big hug!

Twitchy x


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## am64 (Feb 25, 2010)

BIG HUGS rachel just ride it out hunny.... that depression has a nasty habit of sneaking up on you when all seems good xxxbut you know that it will pass like a great big wave and you will be ok again...just keep cosy as rossi says relax if you can xxxx and remember you are the most important thing at the mo xxx


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## Steff (Feb 25, 2010)

Hi Rach hun sorry to see your feeling low h, we are all here for you if not in person then over the net , whatever we can do to bring your mood up we will , xxx just look after yourself and rest up.


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## Shelb1uk (Feb 25, 2010)

Aww Rach, sounds like you have a lot on your plate, some time to yourself or time out might be good for you....sending you lots of hugs, sure its just a phase, we are all here for you xxx


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## rachelha (Feb 26, 2010)

Hello all - feeling a bit brighter this morning, but I am actually going to listen to my boss (for once) and take today off too.  I do feel a bit like I am skiving though, and I have a couple of big deadlines next week - eek.   I guess going in and sitting stressing and doing nothing like I did for most of this week would not help though.

Thanks SO much for all your messages - it really means a lot to me (and to Theo - I showed him and he was really touched at how lovely you all are).  

Am - you are right depression does come (and go) in waves, it is hard to remember that though when you are in the middle of a depression tsunami.  thanks for reminding me.


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## am64 (Feb 26, 2010)

rachelha said:


> Hello all - feeling a bit brighter this morning, but I am actually going to listen to my boss (for once) and take today off too.  I do feel a bit like I am skiving though, and I have a couple of big deadlines next week - eek.   I guess going in and sitting stressing and doing nothing like I did for most of this week would not help though.
> 
> Thanks SO much for all your messages - it really means a lot to me (and to Theo - I showed him and he was really touched at how lovely you all are).
> 
> Am - you are right depression does come (and go) in waves, it is hard to remember that though when you are in the middle of a depression tsunami.  thanks for reminding me.



Rachel  i totally understand what you mean...and  Im so glad the tsunami is now just a storm at sea...and usually after the storm the sun comes out again  xxx hehee stop feeling guilty about work it will be ok better for taking a break xx


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## Steff (Feb 26, 2010)

Hiya rach good news your feeling better, the weekend is here so take time to just relax and take things slow x x


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## Emmal31 (Feb 26, 2010)

Hi Rachel,

I know I'm a little late to this thread as your feeling a bit brighter but just wanted to say dealing with diabetes and pregnancy is tough. I found that I was even tougher on myself about my control throughtout my pregnancy with jessica and the slightest high I would stress and get angry about especially if i'd given myself a correction and it hadn't really worked but the odd high isn't the end of the world my control for the last 3-4 months was terrible because your ratio's are mental towards the end but jessica didn't end up being 10lb she was actually quite small because I'd built up in my mind I was going to have a huge baby. It's much easier said than done but give yourself a bit of a break. Like everyone else has said were all here for you, if you ever want to pm me and talk about anything then feel free.

Emma x


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## rachelha (Mar 1, 2010)

Hello - I have been feeling a bit better over the weekend, but very uptight again today, now I am back at work.  I went to the GP this morning and the suggested putting the dose of my fluoxetine up to 40mg (I am on 20mg at the moment).  I told them I need to think about it and discuss it with the psyciatrist I am seeing and the antenatal clinic.  I don't know what to think.   I worry that my stress levels will affect the baby, but so might a higher dose of medication.

I really hope this little one does not inherit my physical or mental problems.  The poor wee thing.


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## xxlou_lxx (Mar 1, 2010)

Im sure your wee one will be fine 

Your lucky you were allowed to stay on the prozac, I was taken right off everything when I went to my first antenatal appointment! 

I have found this whole pregnancy hard and feel resentful (I know this going to sound bad) towards woman I see enjoying a "normal" complication free pregnancy. But you will probably find that you become more stressed on occasions, as I did and expect all the diabetic ladies on here have.
Its completely normal. 
I take comfort in the fact that there are other women on here sharing similar fears and anxieties and have experienced a lot of the same problems... 
I felt so isolated in the beginning to be honest, found this forum at twenty odd weeks gone I think lol and all I do is moan (you poor people) 

I wouldnt worry about the pills, the doctors must know what they are doing... and also DO NOT GOOGLE anything haha I freaked myself out once doing that (I forget what about now) hehe xxxx


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## am64 (Mar 1, 2010)

that is still a low dose of medication but best to check with the specialists. Can you talk to them at work to help you get through this blip ? so you dont end up exhausted and on a longer term sick leave ? you and the babe are the most important thing at the mo ...could you work some reduced hours go in late ? come home early to avoid rush hour ? could you work  days from home and extend your weekend? I would think that your employer would have a good HR dept and they employed you so they do have to look after you too !


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## Chrissie (Mar 2, 2010)

Hi

I've only just noticed your post! Sorry i didn't reply earlier! I hope your feeling a little bit better!!
Take care & look after yourself xx


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