# Newbie



## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

Hi there, just joined the forum today

i myself do not have Diabetes, but my girlfriend does , Type 1

Can anyone recommend any books? websites? that i can read learn as much as possible about diabetes i have read the diabetes uk website over, but obviously there is so much to learn id rather read about it my self than constantly pester my girlfriend about it 

Thanks

Sean


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## Steff (Apr 20, 2010)

Hi Sean and welcome nice to see your care so much you joined here, does your g.f not want to join?

I would reccommend if you have a library near you to try that you will get a mountain of books from there as well as maybe trying a book called diabetes for dummies by alan l rubin or type 1 diabetes at your fingertips by charlie fox and anne kilvert.If you do fancy any of them id reccommend amazon.co.uk usually there prices  are very resonable.


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## am64 (Apr 20, 2010)

hi sean welcome  i think its great that you obviously want to understand whats happening with your girlfriend  have agood look around the boards and remember no question here is regarded silly x


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

Hi Steff, she may well be a member already am not to sure, she has been diabetic for about 9 years i believe, but it is a very touchy subject with her. 

so im trying to learn as much as i can to try and understand what she is going through

i do infact have a libary near me, and will hunt for them books later today! thanks for the speedy reply


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## Steff (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> Hi Steff, she may well be a member already am not to sure, she has been diabetic for about 9 years i believe, but it is a very touchy subject with her.
> 
> so im trying to learn as much as i can to try and understand what she is going through
> 
> i do infact have a libary near me, and will hunt for them books later today! thanks for the speedy reply



Thats very nice of you hun , many react in diffirent ways when being diagnosed some pretend like it is not happening and put it to the back of there minds , others throw themselves into it and really try and have tight control, what insulin regime is she on?


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

unstill recently she was on 4 injections a day (excuse my lack of knowledge) one being a Nova rapid? and the other i am not to sure off

Recently changed to , Two injections a day, one she takes 30 minuites before eating her breakfast and the other 30 minuites before eating dinner, hope this helps

to me its like she trys to ignore it, but how i see it is, you really cant it makes her who she is.


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## Steff (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> unstill recently she was on 4 injections a day (excuse my lack of knowledge) one being a Nova rapid? and the other i am not to sure off
> 
> Recently changed to , Two injections a day, one she takes 30 minuites before eating her breakfast and the other 30 minuites before eating dinner, hope this helps
> 
> to me its like she trys to ignore it, but how i see it is, you really cant it makes her who she is.



I dont know an awful lot on insulin as im type 2 , but others will throw some names of insulins at you and they may ring a bell.Of course it cant be ignored diabetes simple cannot be ignored as it will come back and bite you on the backside one way or another, does she have a good car team around her?


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

all her family support her fully, and she gets on really well with her nurse, which is a good thing, she has regular checks which i just assume is part of diabetes its self, but from being with her these regular checks seem to just get her down?

is there a way to deal with this? try to speak to her about it? or do i just carry on like normal?


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## Northerner (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> all her family support her fully, and she gets on really well with her nurse, which is a good thing, she has regular checks which i just assume is part of diabetes its self, but from being with her these regular checks seem to just get her down?
> 
> is there a way to deal with this? try to speak to her about it? or do i just carry on like normal?



Hi Sean, welcome to the forum Diabetes gets us all down from time to time as it's hard having to deal with it day in, day out. Maybe her numbers are not as good as she hopes for? It seems strange that she would go from 4 injections to just two - normally it's the other way around as there is more flexibility with 4 injections.

A book I would highly recommend is Type 1 Diabetes in Children, Adolescents and Young Adults by Ragnar Hanas - it will explain everything you need to know.


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## Steff (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> all her family support her fully, and she gets on really well with her nurse, which is a good thing, she has regular checks which i just assume is part of diabetes its self, but from being with her these regular checks seem to just get her down?
> 
> is there a way to deal with this? try to speak to her about it? or do i just carry on like normal?



You could try and talk to her its worth a go, she may react good or bad but you will never know, if nothing else you are trying your best to be there for her .It shows her your showing an interest in her diabetes and you are living with it as well your not the sufferer but your her closest thing to help.


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

i feel like im intruding when i ask her, she said she will sit down with me and go over the website, but she has to be ready for it, like she cant just do it at anytime she needs to be in the mood.

she was having problems with doing her injections so they changed her insulin so there arent as many injections i think, its all a bit personal to her and its not really my place to say on a public forum as she finds it hard enough to speak about it herself.

but if theres anything i can learn from it, then its worth a shot!

ill take out a few books tonight, and read away!

thanks for the help again.


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## Emmal31 (Apr 20, 2010)

Hi 

Where about's in Essex are you? sound's like a very similar story to a woman on here who lives very near to me. I think joining this site would definately help her if you could presuade her to. It's good to see that your trying to find out all you can to help her, were always around if you need help with anything.

Emma


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

hi emma i live in grays, my girlfriend is 18?

i recently mentioned getting her a diary to write in as reading through the site many people do this, she seemed up for it so thats a plus 

just got a text saying she is sad atm, and when i asked why she replied when she has all the appointments and all the speaking about it gets her down, any advice?


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## am64 (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> hi emma i live in grays, my girlfriend is 18?
> 
> i recently mentioned getting her a diary to write in as reading through the site many people do this, she seemed up for him so thats a plus
> 
> just got a text saying she is sad atm, and when i asked why she replied when she has all the appointments and all the speaking about it gets her down, any advice?



send her a big hug from us all xx


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## Emmal31 (Apr 20, 2010)

It's not the same lady then. You live fairly near to where I do though. Diary sound's like a brilliant idea, do you think she would be willing to show it to her care team? Have you suggested councling to her? It sound's like she's never fully accepted she's diabetic and need's some help coming to terms with it.


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

i think she would find it easier to write it down and then allow somone to read it,

she recently went into hospital (skipping injections, not eating properly to lose weight)

so after all the hospital a very horrible doctor in my eyes who seemed to have no time said (if you dont do your injections im just going to send you home to die)

which i dont think is very helpful she came out and told us about her problem and he just didnt help, at the moment we are awaiting instructions on the next step, a specialist is meant to be coming up with a solution councilling or going into a clinic to help her get into the routine, but has been over a month and the last call was to say they hadnt come up with a solution. which is where i come in  when we are together you wont ever see her sad, but soon as we are apart its when she becomes down.

i dont want her to feel like she has to live a lie when she is with me and just put on a smiley face, im not going to judge her


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## sofaraway (Apr 20, 2010)

Check out circledrocks.co.uk it's  group for people with diabetes aged 18-30 to get support from each other. The meetings are in Gravesend so from Grays would take around 30 minutes I think, so might be doable.

I would imagine that she has had trouble with not taking all the injections needed so thats why she has gone onto only 2 a day. Which is good in terms of not having so many injections but doesn't have the flexibility and level of control that 4 a day does. 

It's good that she has a good relationship with her nurse, is she under the adult team or the childrens team still? 

Much respect to you for signing up her and trying to find out information to support her.


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## Shelb1uk (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> Hi there, just joined the forum today
> 
> i myself do not have Diabetes, but my girlfriend does , Type 1
> 
> ...


Hi Sean, its great thats you care so much about ure gf, I had this book when diagnosed 7 years ago and I now work for the people who wrote it! It's broken into manageable chunks 

http://www.successfuldiabetes.com/component/virtuemart/?page=shop.browse&category_id=1&vmcchk=1


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## Shelb1uk (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> hi emma i live in grays, my girlfriend is 18?
> 
> i recently mentioned getting her a diary to write in as reading through the site many people do this, she seemed up for it so thats a plus
> 
> just got a text saying she is sad atm, and when i asked why she replied when she has all the appointments and all the speaking about it gets her down, any advice?



Hi Sean, do you think it would help if she could come to a meet up to meet others with type one? I run a group (www.circledrocks.co.uk) and we meet in Kent  (Gravesend area) and grays isn't far away at all...it's for 18-30's...

We have a meet up next month, and you would be more than welcome to come too...

I really feel for her....let me know if I can do anything to help.xxx


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

i think it would, but whether she would go is another thing, it has taken all these years to come out and tell us her difficulty, i think one step at a time is how well have to take it.

she seems keen on the diary idea, so maybe once the ball is rolling she will be up for more ideas, she recently passed her driving test aswell (crazy driver) so will be able to get there easily.

ill defo have to get her on this site, as im not even diabetic but the amount of help ive recieved in the pass hour is amazing!

the main problem i know is weight, she is not a big girl atall she is beautiful!

am i right in beliving insulin makes you gain weight?


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## Shelb1uk (Apr 20, 2010)

Glad you are getting support from here Sean, you need it too!

Just keep Circle D in the back of your mind as I am sure it would help when she's ready, its really informal...so nice to know you are not the only one too!!!! x


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## Emmal31 (Apr 20, 2010)

Sean.Lawrence said:


> i think she would find it easier to write it down and then allow somone to read it,
> 
> she recently went into hospital (skipping injections, not eating properly to lose weight)
> 
> ...



That is a discraceful way to speak to someone in need of help. Has she ever been on a course I went on the BERTIE course last year at Broomfield hopsital in chelmsford it really helped me gain control of my blood sugars and was so nice to feel normal because I was amoungst other type 1's. Might also help her to deal with things. I'd definately say take one step at a time with what you suggest though so she doesn't feel pressured.


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## PhilT (Apr 20, 2010)

Hi Sean, welcome to the forum.


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

it really brought her down once he said that and as you can understand let me down aswell!

shes really trying 

but anyways i shall keep yuo posted will take out some books tonight, and will defo keep circle d in mind! and hey who knows, maybe she will come on here her self!

thanks for all the help and support!


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## Emmal31 (Apr 20, 2010)

With any luck she'll join and find it a great help and with your help I'm sure she'll be feeling better about things soon.


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## Sean.Lawrence (Apr 20, 2010)

spoke to her just now, said about Circle D, she wasnt keen on the idea, has been to things like that before and didnt like it, but is more than pleased about the diary, im going to read it every week, every other week so that way she doesnt have to directly speak about it

things are already on the up


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## Freddie99 (Apr 20, 2010)

Hi Sean, 

Welcome to the forum. With regards to what your other half's doctor said to her upon her admission to hospital could I suggest first talking to the hospital and then to the GMC if the hospital weren't any good?

It's good to hear that she likes writing. 

Wishing you all the best,

Tom


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## am64 (Apr 20, 2010)

try and get her to read the message boards here ...she doesnt have to join to do so she can log in as a guest  x


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## Laura. (May 4, 2010)

Hi Sean,

Welcome to the forum. I just wanted to say that I think its so good that you're trying to understand your girlfriends diabetes! Im the same age as her and have type one diabetes, although only diagnosed 6 months ago, so if she would find it useful to chat then feel free to message me. I think the diary sounds like a great idea, Im considering starting a blog after reading the blogs of some otherrs on the forum, I think itll be a great place to vent.

Maybe she's embarassed to talk about it, or maybe when shes with you she just likes to ignore that she's not diabetic. I know sometimes I really want to vent to my boyfriend but I feel embarassed or really self concious going on about it, and some other times I just want to feel more "normal" and Ill say as little as possible about it. Just an insight... thought it might help.

Good Luck with it! 
I hope you're both well.

Laura


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