# Son aged 7 newly diagnosed, I'm so upset



## Cheryl76 (Nov 23, 2016)

Hi.  So, I knew my son wasn't very well and took him to the doctor's first thing Monday.  Wee test and blood test then we're in a ambulance to hospital.  Quickly diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and we came home last night.  Should have the support team visit today.  No family history of this.

I just feel devastated.  I can't stop crying and I just want to say help, please help.
I don't really know what I'm wanting just feel so alone.  I'm married but my husband couldn't care any less about me right now and just ignored me while I sobbed.  I'm scared for my son and for myself as selfish as that sounds.  I just have no one to talk to right now.  Thanks for reading.


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## Northerner (Nov 23, 2016)

Oh Cheryl, I'm so sorry to hear about your son's diagnosis  Don't worry, you are NOT alone, there are lots of friendly, knowledgeable people here who know very much how you are feeling, and can help you with your questions and concerns 

There is a very steep learning curve with Type 1 diabetes, but things will become easier in time, and it doesn't have to stand in his way of doing anything he wants to do. People live full, happy and healthy lives with diabetes and can excel in any field (think of people like Sir Steve Redgrave and PM Theresa May ) I would suggest having a read of Adrienne's essential guide for parents of newly-diagnosed children, written by one of our members whose daughter was diagnosed within hours of her birth. You should also get a copy of Type 1 Diabetes in Children Adolescents and Young People by Ragnar Hanas - considered to be the 'bible' for children and young people on insulin regimes, and an essential reference, it will help you get to grips with all aspects of living with diabetes. I'd also recommend looking at the Children With Diabetes website. They are a UK organisation of parents of Type 1 children and have lots of information about things like schools, care plans etc.

How is he feeling about things, is he coping OK with the injections? What insulin has he been given? Please let us know if you have ANY questions, we will be more than happy to help


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## Ljc (Nov 23, 2016)

Hello Cheryl, Welcome to the forum. I am sorry to hear about your sons diagnosis. I can only imagine how worried you must be. We have quite a few mum's and dads on here plus some very knowledgeable people who will be along soon. I just couldn't read and pass on by. 
This is a good place for friendly support and advise , I'm sorry to hear your husband is not being very supportive ATM.  Could it be he is numb with shock ?


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## Cheryl76 (Nov 23, 2016)

He's having 3 day time injections of a fast acting insulin before meals and a slow night time one.  Sorry if all the terminology is wrong.  He gets very upset and tearful with the finger prick tests and the injections.  My heart breaks a little seeing that.
Unfortunately my husband doesn't care about me and the marriage has been crumbling for a while.  He couldn't get away from the hospital quick enough so feeling very alone.  He may be struggling with it but he won't discuss his feelings.


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## Northerner (Nov 23, 2016)

Cheryl76 said:


> He's having 3 day time injections of a fast acting insulin before meals and a slow night time one.  Sorry if all the terminology is wrong.  He gets very upset and tearful with the finger prick tests and the injections.  My heart breaks a little seeing that.
> Unfortunately my husband doesn't care about me and the marriage has been crumbling for a while.  He couldn't get away from the hospital quick enough so feeling very alone.  He may be struggling with it but he won't discuss his feelings.


I'm sorry to hear this, it's a shame you don't have your husband's support  I hope at least that your son is being shielded from this at such a difficult time for him. 

Hopefully, things will become clearer when you get your visit later on, I hope you have a good team to help with things  He is on a good insulin regime, which should be flexible for him, so that's a good start. Rubbing the injection site with an ice cube can sometimes help take away any sting, but often it is the tensing up and anticipation of the injection that causes pain - once he becomes more relaxed they should be practically painless. There are different sizes of needles too, so there may be a shorter length that he finds better (shortest are 4mm). This little guide might help with the finger pricking.


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## Bloden (Nov 23, 2016)

Welcome to the forum, Cheryl. I'm sorry to hear about your little one's diagnosis. It's only natural to feel upset but, as Northerner says, you're not alone on this forum. I hope the visit with the team goes well later and they help you start coming to terms with the new situation. In the meantime, fire away with your questions...we're here to help and support you.


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## stephknits (Nov 23, 2016)

Welcome Cheryl, it is a big shock, but well done for acting quickly and getting your son medical help.  If you haven't already, get a pen and a pad and start to write down any questions you have, and issues you have come up with etc, so that when the team comes round you don't forget anything.  Also, write down what they say, as you probably won't remember it later.  Best of luck and we are all here to support you .


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## grovesy (Nov 23, 2016)

Welcome. 
It is still very early days for you. Have you got any other family or friends around to support you. 
There are a number of parents of recently diagnosed children who may be along to offer you some pointers.


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## Lindarose (Nov 23, 2016)

Welcome Cheryl. I'm really sorry to hear of your sons diagnosis and also the fact it's compounded by other problems. 
I hope today's visit helps you feel more confident and wish you both well.


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## Redkite (Nov 23, 2016)

Cheryl76 said:


> He's having 3 day time injections of a fast acting insulin before meals and a slow night time one.  Sorry if all the terminology is wrong.  He gets very upset and tearful with the finger prick tests and the injections.  My heart breaks a little seeing that.
> Unfortunately my husband doesn't care about me and the marriage has been crumbling for a while.  He couldn't get away from the hospital quick enough so feeling very alone.  He may be struggling with it but he won't discuss his feelings.



Welcome to the forum Cheryl, and sorry to hear about your little boy's diagnosis.  My son was diagnosed aged 4 (he's nearly 16 now) and I have a vivid memory of the diagnosis, the shock and devastation, and how it turned our world upside down.  You are experiencing a kind of bereavement and it will take time to adjust - but please let me reassure you that your son will still be able to lead a full and happy life, eat a normal diet, play sports, do well at school, etc etc.  Sending you a big hug from one Mum to another 

You are in at the deep end, and there's a steep learning curve, but you'll be a type 1 expert very quickly - I highly recommend the Ragnar Hanas book that Northerner mentioned above - this book is written in a clear approachable style and is positive and upbeat, and I found it invaluable in the early weeks, especially when I needed advice out of hours.  I also recommend if you're on Facebook joining the group "CWD - Main Group", to connect with other parents of children with diabetes and draw on our collective experience.  There is usually someone online on that group at any hour of the day or night!

Re your son getting upset over the injections and fingerpricks, I well remember that as being one of the most upsetting things - I literally had to pin my son down to inject him as he screamed and pleaded, heartbreaking .  But the fear is worse than the actual feel of the needles - make sure you have 4mm or 5mm needles, much gentler.  For the fingerpricker, use the lowest (shallowest) setting - this is relatively gentle compared to the butcher's device that they use on the wards!  Only prick the sides of the top part of the fingers, never the pads (these have the most nerve endings and so hurt more), and avoid pricking index fingers and thumbs.  He will get used to it before long and it will be much less traumatic, but in the meantime you need to be brisk and no-nonsense about it, and then move on to doing nice things immediately afterwards.  Don't let the clinic push your son to do his own injections unless he himself wants to - some kids are happy to do this, but most want the support of an adult at that age - my son didn't self inject until he was 11.

Sorry also to hear about your husband's attitude.  I was married at the time my son was diagnosed, but although his Dad did care in his own way, he didn't get properly involved in learning about the diabetes care, and certainly wasn't supportive of me.  We have since divorced (unconnected with the diabetes), and though he regularly sees our son, he doesn't have him overnight because he can't/won't support him with his diabetes.  That doesn't mean that he didn't care/grieve about the diagnosis, and it could be that your husband is upset but can't express his emotions.  Whatever the situation, is there any other family member who could offer you some support, and maybe even come along with you to clinic and learn about your son's diabetes care?  I speak from experience when I say I feel vulnerable as a single parent with nobody to fall back on if I were ill.  None of my family live nearby and none of them know anything about type 1 management.  So do try and get Grandparents or aunty/uncle on board from the start if you can.

{{{hugs}}} xx


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## Flower (Nov 23, 2016)

Hello and welcome Cheryl.

I'm so sorry to hear about your little one's diagnosis, it is a huge shock and one steep learning curve to take on the running of something that just used to happen. The technology for managing diabetes is improving daily with great blood glucose management gadgets and gizmos which will enable your son to manage his diabetes very effectively. Young children are amazing resilient and seem to adapt quite quickly to the new normal,plus they are so tech savvy they really won't puzzle over how to set the right measurements on a glucose meter!

There are lovely people on here who have lived very well with type 1 for 50+ years without the benefit of  todays fantastic meters, pens and pumps so there is every reason for a very happy healthy outlook. The blocks of living with diabetes will slowly start to fall into place and hopefully life will start to seem less frightening for you.

This forum is a fantastic resource for help and support and as the others have said please ask away and between us all we can answer problems you may face.
I wish you and your son well with getting to grips with his diagnosis


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## Cheryl76 (Nov 23, 2016)

Thanks so much for the replies, and especially to Redkite for the mum hug.  

I feel very much like I'm grieving and like somehow he won't be the same.  I have to keep being with him to remind myself my little man is still the same Mario obsessed, funny, caring little person.

I feel scared to feed and water him as though everything I do might not be exactly right and I'll damage him.

Fortunately his school have been awesome, and I now know that 3 teachers have children with type 1.  I feel boosted by hearing stories of achievements of those that had it from a young age.

My son is being protected from his father and my ill feeling.  I don't sob infront of him.  I'm honing my duck skills, calm on the top and turmoil on the bottom.  

The Children's Diabetes Team are visiting at 2pm so I'm feeling better about that.  Just confused with prescriptions as the GP said they have the info from the hospital but I need to tell them what I need and how much.  They might as well ask me to Chinese.


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## Redkite (Nov 23, 2016)

Great news that school is being supportive (lots aren't so that's a BIG positive).  Children are very resilient and at his age he won't have all those fears about the future that adults have - for him it's more about still being able to have that big 99 ice cream (and yes he can, but with insulin).  He will still be the same lovely little boy as before, it's just he will need help and support, and things that you could do spontaneously like running outside to play in the snow will need a bit of forethought, ie a blood glucose test and a snack to prevent hypos - all this will become second nature before too long.  My son (also a big Mario Karts fan at that age, and a Lego Star Wars fiend too!) carried on with swimming, gymnastics, beavers/Cubs/scouts, taekwondo up to black belt, tennis, and last year did the Duke of Edinburgh bronze award expedition.  He's in Y11 now and in the middle of mock exams, and is a typical teenager really, grumpy when I prize his phone out of his hand and make him do some revision, but usually a lovely lad .  Type 1 isn't the end of the world


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## Cheryl76 (Nov 23, 2016)

Thank you, it's really reassuring to hear about life with your son.  The diabetes consultant at the hospital said if relatives buy him diabetic chocolate he can throw it back at them
I think I worry about him being denied things.

His little sister is 5, she's been great but got upset watching his test and injection yesterday.  I'm trying to take all her feelings into consideration too.  It's tiring.


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## grovesy (Nov 23, 2016)

Cheryl76 said:


> Thanks so much for the replies, and especially to Redkite for the mum hug.
> 
> I feel very much like I'm grieving and like somehow he won't be the same.  I have to keep being with him to remind myself my little man is still the same Mario obsessed, funny, caring little person.
> 
> ...


I would order more than you think you need,or  maybe the Diabetes team may be able to guide you. Most surgeries require 48 hours notice, of ordering. Unfortunately not all areas or surgeries work in the same manner. Have you looked on the website or asked if they can walk you through the system.


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## Lou1982 (Nov 23, 2016)

HI Cheryl, I was in the same boat as you. Marriage was crumbling, then my 3 year old daughter was diagnosed with type 1 on 23rd sept.  she was completely traumatised with all the finger pricks and injections,  we had to pin her down screaming and kicking just to give her insulin.  She soon got used to it though after a couple of weeks.  Now she doesn't bat an eyelid when getting her insulin, and likes to set up her blood glucose meter herself when getting her finger prick.  Kids seem to adapt to it all so well.  Better than us adults. 
2 weeks after her diagnosis, my husband and I split.  On top of this I was 8 months pregnant.  I now have a 3 week old son as well as my daughter to look after, and we are all doing great.  2 months ago, I never thought my life would be like this.  I was worrying constantly about my daughter,  and what the future holds for her.  I do still worry about some things, but feel so much better about it all now.  Once you have had all your training and clinic appointments, you do feel so much better, and realise that it is manageable.  It is a lot of info to take in at first, but with anything it does get better, and you learn more over time. I am still learning a lot now, the diabetes Nurses here are fab, and this forum is a great help.
I wish you both well


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## SB2015 (Nov 23, 2016)

Welcome Cheryl. So sorry to hear about your sons dignosis, but as you have found already, you are very definitely not alone and there is loads of help available on here.

It is great to hear that the school are being so supportive.  That can make so much difference, and with the teachers' own experiences of children with T1 they will be able to help your son at school.

The Ragnar Hanas book is excellent and provides a good reference book in the future is, so try not to be out off by the price of it.  It really is excellent.  I have been diagnosed for nearly 9 years now and still refer back to it as it has an excellent index making it easy to find the info you need.

Just keep asking any questions, and let us know how the appointment goes today.


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## Redkite (Nov 23, 2016)

Cheryl76 said:


> Thank you, it's really reassuring to hear about life with your son.  The diabetes consultant at the hospital said if relatives buy him diabetic chocolate he can throw it back at them
> I think I worry about him being denied things.
> 
> His little sister is 5, she's been great but got upset watching his test and injection yesterday.  I'm trying to take all her feelings into consideration too.  It's tiring.



Yes avoid the so-called diabetic foods unless you enjoy tummy cramps and diarrhoea!  You'll learn all about food, carbs and insulin dosing in time, but as a newbie you'll probably start off by avoiding large carby snacks between meals, because these would need an extra injection.  My son used to get his "fix" of treats (e.g. mini packets of haribos or treat-sized chocolate bars) either as a pre-exercise snack or added on to the end of a meal, so that the carbs would be included in his meal injection.  He has been on an insulin pump for several years, which among other benefits makes it easier to take insulin for snacks (something you might want to think about in due course).  He doesn't have siblings, but when he had friends or cousins over I'd make sure he could be the same as them, whether that meant an extra injection for a treat or everyone else having theirs when he did.  It wouldn't be fair on your daughter to feel restricted because of her brother's diabetes, but if you make it a whole family approach to meals and snacks, e.g. no sweets between meals is the family rule, not a diabetes rule.  We used to have "sugary Saturday" when he was allowed to have Coco Pops and the like, and on other days more ordinary cereals - but this was something I'd have tried to do even if he didn't have diabetes.  Now he's a teenager he eats non-stop, a lot of junk as well!  But somehow we manage to keep his blood glucose levels within acceptable parameters .


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## HOBIE (Nov 23, 2016)

Cheryl76 said:


> Hi.  So, I knew my son wasn't very well and took him to the doctor's first thing Monday.  Wee test and blood test then we're in a ambulance to hospital.  Quickly diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and we came home last night.  Should have the support team visit today.  No family history of this.
> 
> I just feel devastated.  I can't stop crying and I just want to say help, please help.
> I don't really know what I'm wanting just feel so alone.  I'm married but my husband couldn't care any less about me right now and just ignored me while I sobbed.  I'm scared for my son and for myself as selfish as that sounds.  I just have no one to talk to right now.  Thanks for reading.


Welcome Cheryl. Well done for getting him to the Drs !  Life ! its not meant to be easy is it ? I was diagnosed more than 50yrs ago at the age of 3. (the dark ages) I know a lot of T1s & its hard but worth learning & managing to cope


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## Cezzer (Nov 24, 2016)

Hi Cheryl
I'm new here too. My son is 16 and was diagnosed Monday this week. I'm divorced and have no partner, although my ex and I are on very good terms. Like you, I feel very alone. I have cried a lot. I don't want my lovely little man to change. We're having issues with injecting as he has a phobia. I'm doing it for him at the moment. I've already had people telling me I'm wrong to do that, but I'm going with my heart on this one. I'm going to be on the same steep learning curve as you and I am more than happy to do it with you if it will help. If you're anything like me you're feeling completely overwhelmed at the moment.
Much love and hugs x


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## HOBIE (Nov 26, 2016)

Cezzer said:


> Hi Cheryl
> I'm new here too. My son is 16 and was diagnosed Monday this week. I'm divorced and have no partner, although my ex and I are on very good terms. Like you, I feel very alone. I have cried a lot. I don't want my lovely little man to change. We're having issues with injecting as he has a phobia. I'm doing it for him at the moment. I've already had people telling me I'm wrong to do that, but I'm going with my heart on this one. I'm going to be on the same steep learning curve as you and I am more than happy to do it with you if it will help. If you're anything like me you're feeling completely overwhelmed at the moment.
> Much love and hugs x


Well done for doing his injections Cezzer.  I have been to a DUK children's event & got put in charge of about 8 teenagers & one had never self injected. Me & the other kids persuaded the kid to inject . Her parents had tried for a long time. Everyone is different. Good luck from someone in his 50th year of sticking pins in ! (ask me if I like injections ?)


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## Cheryl76 (Nov 26, 2016)

Lou1982 - wow you've been through a lot alongside the diagnosis.  I'm in awe of your strength getting through it.  I think I'm putting so much pressure on myself to just know it all and get it perfect but I don't want to obsess.

The appointment on Wednesday was brilliant.  The nurse we met if 1 of a team of 5.  She was lovely, I felt supported by her strength and competence.  She has dealt with the school and arranged training first thing Monday morning by her manager.  She's keen to get my son into school late Monday morning and quite firm that the school deal with his jabs.  I am desperate to do it myself for fear that he'll be upset.  She says start how you mean to go on.  I think she's right, mum guilt is riding high right now.  She spent 2.5 hours with us and my son really liked her.  She even chatted to my daughter when she got in from school.

My husband is supporting my son but not me.  He really can't deal with me being emotional.  His work would have supported him having time off but he insisted on going back to work Thursday because the RAF would crumble without him.  (they really, really wouldn't)

Redkite - a appreciate those tips.  We've already taken your advise and started to implement healthy (low carb) snacks, just one, between meals and his sister has the same.  We have started to have a little bit of dessert now so it satisfies his sweet tooth.  If anything, though its extra work its given me a kick up the bum to be more structured and not just let the kids graze through the day.

I still have so many questions and I'm on a emotional roller coaster but my sister has been amazing even though she's 200 miles away.  I've found out who my real friends are, the ones who have really stepped up.  Especially a lovely married couple, who have even suggested they get trained up on diabetes care so they can have my boy over for playdates/sleepovers to give me a break.

My son has been absolutely amazing.  I have really brave normal moments and massive crashing grief like sobbing moments.  He already has accepted the blood tests and will happily be pricked by someone else and does the strip himself.  He's getting brave with having the insulin in his arms but doesn't like it being done in his legs and hasn't attempted tummy yet. 

Can I ask someone who's had this a while, when you go out do you have to do the tests/jabs in private?  Can you do them at the table you eat at or the place you go?  It feels like breast feeding, some people won't even notice and some might stare and say something. 

Cezzer - I'll go through this with you!  Wow, both our boys diagnosed on Monday.  How are you doing today?  They're still our little boys be they 7 or 16.  Sometimes I think it must be so much harder for a teenager than a child.  My boy is still at the stage where he accepts mummy's rules and trusts me to just guide him.  I do feel overwhelmed.  I have brief moments where things feel like they always did but suddenly the diagnosis hits me and I cry hard again.  Do you have supportive friends to help you through this?  I'm struggling with the knowledge of it all, sometimes I'm grateful for the gentle introduction by the nurses with his care but alongside feel frustrated that I don't know absolutely everything.  I've never felt as tired as I do right now.  Much love n hugs to you too xxx


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## Redkite (Nov 26, 2016)

Absolutely no need to hide away to test and inject, we've always done these in public.  Most of the time nobody notices, occasionally someone asks a polite, kind question.  If anyone ever objected or was rude, I think the tiger Mum in me would show itself 

FYI Type 1 Diabetes is a recognised disability under the Disability Discrimination Act and the Equality Act, so you can't be told to leave a restaurant etc for injecting insulin.


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## Carol F (Dec 4, 2016)

Welcome - you'll get loads of support on here..i did ..  and you will learn alot..i did.  I felt like i was grieving a terrible loss the first week of my wee boys diagnosis.  After that I pulled myself together and got on with it..we're five and a half months in and its become a way of life.  Cameron is 8 and does all his injections and finger tests himself.. i only carb count work out insulin and keep a close eye on the clock..
It will get better for you. 
Its a huge learning curve but help is here on this forum. X


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## AJLang (Dec 7, 2016)

Welcome to the forum, your son's diagnosis must be such a shock for you.  I don't know if this helps but I was diagnosed when I was 2, nearly 46 years ago.  The treatment then was awful in comparison to that of today but I've had a brilliant life. It has been really good and your son will have a great life as well.  Take care of yourself.  Some dad's do find it incredibly difficult to deal with illness and think if they don't discuss it then it will disappear.  Big hugs to all of you.


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## Hnorcy (Jan 15, 2017)

I find myself in a similar situation, my daughter 6 was diagnosed last week and it's all so overwhelming. I am a medical professional ( different field) but I find it all baffling so I hate to imagine how hard it is for a none medic. There is so much info to take on board and you want to get it perfect straight away. It's so hard. 

We went to a birthday party today and it was heartbreaking. She is on the 2 injections, I have cut sugars and I am carefully monitoring carbs until I get all the books and advise I need to manage this awful condition. 
I have just read about pumps and automatic glucose testing. I will be enquiring about this with my nurse asap. 









Cheryl76 said:


> Hi.  So, I knew my son wasn't very well and took him to the doctor's first thing Monday.  Wee test and blood test then we're in a ambulance to hospital.  Quickly diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and we came home last night.  Should have the support team visit today.  No family history of this.
> 
> I just feel devastated.  I can't stop crying and I just want to say help, please help.
> I don't really know what I'm wanting just feel so alone.  I'm married but my husband couldn't care any less about me right now and just ignored me while I sobbed.  I'm scared for my son and for myself as selfish as that sounds.  I just have no one to talk to right now.  Thanks for reading.[/


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## trophywench (Jan 15, 2017)

Hi all - what you are all experiencing actually- is GRIEF.  It's exactly the same emotions as when someone close dies.

Nobody would expect you to just shrug your shoulders and get on with it if someone close had actually died - so they - and YOU - shouldn't expect to with this!  But the same as that kind of grieving process - it fades with time.

Have a look at this book extract
- http://www.businessballs.com/elisabeth_kubler_ross_five_stages_of_grief.htm -

and plot what stage you are at - as you go on.  I never saw this till about 2007  and I can still recognise and recall going through every stage when I was diagnosed.   It's unconscious, one day you'll suddenly realise you don't seem to have collapsed in tears 'for no reason at all' lately.  Gosh - I must be over it!  Look forward to getting there - and don't waste time with 'blame' or 'I can't do it' - nobody and no thing is to blame and Oh yes you CAN do it - simply - because you - we! - HAVE to.

Good luck !


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## Northerner (Jan 15, 2017)

Hnorcy said:


> I find myself in a similar situation, my daughter 6 was diagnosed last week and it's all so overwhelming. I am a medical professional ( different field) but I find it all baffling so I hate to imagine how hard it is for a none medic. There is so much info to take on board and you want to get it perfect straight away. It's so hard.
> 
> We went to a birthday party today and it was heartbreaking. She is on the 2 injections, I have cut sugars and I am carefully monitoring carbs until I get all the books and advise I need to manage this awful condition.
> I have just read about pumps and automatic glucose testing. I will be enquiring about this with my nurse asap.


Hi @Hnorcy, welcome to the forum  Very sorry to hear about your little one's diagnosis  It's a very steep learning curve, but things will gradually fall into place. Do have a browse of the resources described in our 'Useful Links' thread:

https://forum.diabetes.org.uk/boards/threads/useful-links-for-people-new-to-diabetes.10406/

Please let us know if you have any questions and we will  be more than happy to help


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## Hnorcy (Jan 15, 2017)

Thank you


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## Redkite (Jan 19, 2017)

Hnorcy said:


> I find myself in a similar situation, my daughter 6 was diagnosed last week and it's all so overwhelming. I am a medical professional ( different field) but I find it all baffling so I hate to imagine how hard it is for a none medic. There is so much info to take on board and you want to get it perfect straight away. It's so hard.
> 
> We went to a birthday party today and it was heartbreaking. She is on the 2 injections, I have cut sugars and I am carefully monitoring carbs until I get all the books and advise I need to manage this awful condition.
> I have just read about pumps and automatic glucose testing. I will be enquiring about this with my nurse asap.



Oh my goodness @Hnorcy I'm surprised your daughter's been started on twice daily injections.  My son was started on that back in 2005 and it was out of date even then.  It's really impossible to get any kind of control with twice daily insulin in a growing child, let alone being able to manage parties and childhood bugs.  Most children these days are on multiple daily injections (MDI) or an insulin pump straight from diagnosis.  I recommend getting yourself the Ragnar Hanas book and finding out as much as you can about the different insulin regimens, then go back to your clinic team and ask for a more flexible approach.  Just as an example, she could have the same party food as all the other kids if she was on a pump or MDI, you'd just give rapid acting insulin for whatever carbs she was having.  Twice daily is dreadful - all the big class parties my son went to were always mid afternoon, so party food served at 4, too late for lunch, too early for tea, completely unworkable on such a rigid regime.


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## Hnorcy (Jan 19, 2017)

Thank you @Redkite I had come to that conclusion myself after reading up a little. I think the nurse was trying to give her time to get used to it all and she said she would introduce us to carb counting and MDI when we come back from a skiing holiday (we already had booked before diagnosis) I feel so stressed out by it all. First day back at dance tonight and 2 hypos


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## Redkite (Jan 19, 2017)

It's a steep learning curve but you'll get there, it's really early days still.  On twice daily insulin your only option for trying to prevent exercise-hypos is to give a sugary snack before the exercise, but it's trial and error how much to give.


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## Hnorcy (Jan 19, 2017)

I had given her a small snack, but obviously not enough. Will the school do her injections?


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## Redkite (Jan 19, 2017)

Hnorcy said:


> I had given her a small snack, but obviously not enough. Will the school do her injections?



The school must ensure that she is fully supported with her diabetes care and can access all areas of the curriculum.  Therefore legally they must provide a member of staff (preferably more than one) to do insulin injections.  Individual staff cannot be compelled to give injections, but if none are willing to volunteer, the school has a duty to employ someone with this duty in their contract.  It is not acceptable to require parents to come into school to do this (a big improvement on the old days!).  You and your DSN need to meet with the school, to draw up a care plan for your daughter and for the DSN to train staff.  If she's on twice daily when she starts back at school, make sure the school knows that this is only temporary and she will eventually be needing a lunchtime injection.


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## Hnorcy (Jan 19, 2017)

She went back on Monday, the school has been very good so far. I was wondering if that was why they did 2 injections to avoid the school having to do it. 
I'm due to go back to work next week but I can't decide if I'm ready. I have a stressful job where I need to support other people and I'm not feeling very stable at the minute. Part of me thinks it would be better to get back to normal routine. My daughter is getting very used to me being around. Did you take time off work ?


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## Redkite (Jan 19, 2017)

Hnorcy said:


> She went back on Monday, the school has been very good so far. I was wondering if that was why they did 2 injections to avoid the school having to do it.
> I'm due to go back to work next week but I can't decide if I'm ready. I have a stressful job where I need to support other people and I'm not feeling very stable at the minute. Part of me thinks it would be better to get back to normal routine. My daughter is getting very used to me being around. Did you take time off work ?



It was different for me because he was 4 at diagnosis and I hadn't returned to work yet since he was born (was hoping for another baby but wasn't to be).  So he started reception newly diagnosed and in those days (2005) the equality law was weaker and it was pot luck whether a school would be supportive or not - I had to go in every day and do his tests and injections, so took a job as a midday supervisor throughout his primary school.  In your case, it depends how you feel the school is coping and how settled your daughter is.  Are you contactable by phone while at work?


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## Hnorcy (Jan 19, 2017)

No not at work. I think I'll speak to my go tomorrow


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## HOBIE (Jan 21, 2017)

Hnorcy I have been T1 for more than 50yrs & never been unemployed in my life quite often 6 &7 days a week. Good luck  ps still full time employed.


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## KateR (Jan 21, 2017)

Hi Cheryl. Welcome to the forum. Sending you lots of support and (((hugs))).


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## Vicki farrant (Mar 7, 2017)

Hi how are you getting on now ?
Hope you coping
Oh that's great you have good support at school is he still getting on ok with it at school ?
My daughter was diagnosed 4 weeks ago (shes 13 )  and I still keep getting upset over it and stressed
I have a partner but we don't get on, so hes no comfort and  he just wants to moan about silly things when all I care about at the moment is my daughter !
Its pretty lonely at first isn't it I feel like that an am trying to find some diabetic friends for myself and my daughter but its proving no so easy


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## Hnorcy (Mar 27, 2017)

Vicki farrant said:


> Hi how are you getting on now ?
> Hope you coping
> Oh that's great you have good support at school is he still getting on ok with it at school ?
> My daughter was diagnosed 4 weeks ago (shes 13 )  and I still keep getting upset over it and stressed
> ...


Hi
We are 3months in now. We are settling into our new routines. We had a skiing holiday and that was a big turning point for us all. I decided we would get on with it! We stopped talking about diabetes constantly and had some fun. It was just what the whole family needed. My daughter is having a few "it's not fair" moments but on the whole she is doing great. It's not easy but we don't have a choice. One day at a time xx I did feel lonely too it's as if nobody really understands xx stay positive and your daughter will be too xx


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## HOBIE (Mar 27, 2017)

You learn every single day the things that work or don't.


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