# playing with friend



## grahams mum (Jan 20, 2010)

how difficult is when other mums askyou to have your child to play or stay for dinner to another friends and you have to explained what you need to do and some they give up and never ask you again at the moment i have only two friends that i can trust with graham how is for you?


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## Adrienne (Jan 20, 2010)

Jessica only goes to one other girl who is diabetic in the area for tea and even a couple of sleep overs.     The other girl is going on a pump soon and then she can go there as well.  It is just too much responsibility otherwise especially as Jessica generally has no hypo awareness which makes it even harder and has no inclination at all to look after herself.


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## am64 (Jan 20, 2010)

what a tough situation for you all it was bad enough when my kids were that sort of agewith out the complications of D...one thing i would do is invite the kids to me ...so mine had a good time with their friends and mums picking up could me sussed out on home turf so to speak...


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## Adrienne (Jan 20, 2010)

Yep do that but not a lot because I am tooooo knackered to be honest.   Up at night, work as much as I can in the day time and all the other diabetes stuff that comes up and I'm whacked out.


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## am64 (Jan 20, 2010)

Adrienne said:


> Yep do that but not a lot because I am tooooo knackered to be honest.   Up at night, work as much as I can in the day time and all the other diabetes stuff that comes up and I'm whacked out.



totally understand, adrienne thats why i really admire you supermums so much...xx


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## Adrienne (Jan 20, 2010)

Thanks.  x


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## smile4loubie (Jan 21, 2010)

My sisters friend has just fairly recently been diagnosed with diabetes. She stays at ours as my mums got me and my twin who are both diabetic. When I was younger (I got diagnosed at 15) I only stayed round my best friends house and i guess i was lucky enough to be old enough to do keep control of it for that one night sorta thing. As long as hes happy going round to those few friends houses don't worry about it. In the long run its the other parents/children who are loosing out because they are unable or willing to learn about diabetes.


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## Carynb (Jan 21, 2010)

I really want J to be able to go to his friends houses for tea etc but I too feel it is an enormous responsibility for the other parents. He has been to one friends house but it is very nearby so I could shoot over there if needed- which it wasn't.
I don't know if I'm being too anxious about it or it's perfectly normal to feel like this, I don't want to wrap him up in cotton wool but there is also that thought of what if something happens?
He does his own injections and BS but needs reminding and supervision.
It's a tough one......


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## Adrienne (Jan 22, 2010)

Carynb said:


> I really want J to be able to go to his friends houses for tea etc but I too feel it is an enormous responsibility for the other parents. He has been to one friends house but it is very nearby so I could shoot over there if needed- which it wasn't.
> I don't know if I'm being too anxious about it or it's perfectly normal to feel like this, I don't want to wrap him up in cotton wool but there is also that thought of what if something happens?
> He does his own injections and BS but needs reminding and supervision.
> It's a tough one......



You are not alone in the slightest.   The majority of parents from the email list don't do 'going to tea', it is an awful subject and there is so much guilt on the parents shoulders but you muddle through and do your best by having friends to tea and doing other things like going to the cinema or bowling or something etc etc etc.   This is a hard hard subject and there are no answers but you are not alone.


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## Caroline (Jan 25, 2010)

When organising parties I used to add tot he invitations a note asking if there were any foods the kids were not allowed to have. One mum said her little boy was a diabetic and either she came or he couldn't. I always allowed her to come as it was re-assurance for her, and she was there just incase.


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## Kei (Jan 25, 2010)

F has only gone to tea with a friend once since diagnosis and it wasn't a big problem.  When my husband dropped F off, the friend's mum showed him what was for tea.  He made sure she knew how much of each thing F could eat, and they stuck to that.  Since we carb-count, we knew that she was getting the right amount.   She had her monitor and hypo kit with her and knows how to use it, but I had told the mum to phone me if there was any problem.  There wasn't, and we would be fine doing that again.  

F has another friend who sometimes has her to tea, and her mum is willing to do the same, although we haven't done so yet.

Sleepovers would be another matter, but at 6 years old, I don't really think she's old enough for that anyway.


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