# Jehovas witnesses..I want an opinion



## Steff (Nov 3, 2010)

For the last 5 months I have been having door step discussions with 2 lovely ladies milly and lorraine who are jehovas witnesses,they came to my door and i just thought oh here we go, but after a chat and a flick through some parafanilia i thought why not they may be able to help me,so ever since then they come to see me once a week for about half an hour and we discuss things in the bible and go through various other things let praying etc etc all the usual kind of stuff, anyway the other week when i was poorly they kindly posted a get well soon card and some paperwork through the door on diabetes some lovely verses etc etc then i went on to find lorraine has a type 1 son who has been diabetic 9 years so i feel we have that connection also,BUT my other half and others are telling me its a waste of time and they will just try and play with my mind, im unsure what to do as i am more open minded then he and others are, or am i just more neive??
Anyone want to throw there thoughts my way please??

Thanks


----------



## Caroline (Nov 3, 2010)

We get lots of Jehovas Witnesses near my home too. A couple of my friends are Jehovas Winesses. They know there is little point in trying to convert me, so they don't. Many are very nice people

I think it depends what you are expected to give up or what you are expected to do (for example do you want to spend time on other peoples doorsteps or with your family). The only person that can decide for you is you.

My suggestion is always do research before you decide then make an informed choice. It works for some and not for others.


----------



## Steff (Nov 3, 2010)

I guess that because its been so long i would have a feeling of guilt if i suddenly stopped seeing them because of what others are telling me, there 2 very lovely people and have done nothing but be very kind etc etc.


----------



## Caroline (Nov 3, 2010)

It has to be your choice. Have you told the ladies how you feel? Most are very understanding although it is difficult to turn your back on someone who has helped you through a tough spot.


----------



## FM001 (Nov 3, 2010)

Steff, just think long and hard before making any sort of commitment, everyone is nice when they are trying to sell you something or convert you to their own ideals, so you must keep this in mind.  I don't know much about Jehovas Witness or any other religion for that matter, but do know that Jehovas do expect a bigger commitment by the individual and you may have to adapt to their strange beliefs about not accepting blood in a medical crisis, so do be warned!


----------



## Robster65 (Nov 3, 2010)

Hi Steff

I won't go into my views on various belief systems, but I think I'm right in saying that Jehovah's witnesses disapprove of putting things from other sources into your body.

ie. blood transfusion, drugs, etc.

Not sure if this extends to pharmaceuticals. If I'm wrong about this, I apologise.

It's nice if they are supporting you but some organisations do rely on finding people who feel vulnerable and then impose their views and some may try to get you to donate money. Again, they may be just supporting you, which is good.

Be cautious, but as said, it's your choice.

Rob


----------



## margie (Nov 3, 2010)

Steph - I guess your OH is worried that you may become a Jehovah's witness and what that may entail for him. Ie I don't think they approve of living together before marriage. It does sound that with the discussions you are having the question of joining them may come up.

You could have a look at their web-site and see if there are any beliefs there that you would have problems with

Here is a link to their young people ask section 

http://www.watchtower.org/e/archives/index.htm#young_people

You could tell the ladies that you just want friendship.

I know of a priest who was very derogatory about JWs. I think part of that came from the fact that a couple of them had knocked on the presbytery door.....


----------



## Dizzydi (Nov 3, 2010)

Hi Steffie,

I would research the religion and come to your own conclusions. It is all about what you do or dont believe in. I know the Jehovah's didn't have the best of reputations years ago - but I think with all things in life religions become more modern in there views etc.

My mother in law is very religious and is a great believer in god. She tells me she is always praying for me - bless her.
Me personally I had religion rammed down my throat as a young child and teenager (I wont tell you which religion) - the result being it has turned me against religion completely. 

My youngest sister kept telling me god does things for a reason and will only let you suffer so much and I am ashamed to admit I shouted at her, telling her if god is so wonderful why is there so much suffering in the world and especially why am I childless - we have agreed she will not talk religion to me anymore.

But like I said before - it is about what you think and feel and believe. Take your time and don't be presurised.

Hope your ok.

Di xxx


----------



## Andy HB (Nov 3, 2010)

You could just treat them as friends and not get involved with the religion side of things?

Andy


----------



## bigpurpleduck (Nov 3, 2010)

Andy HB said:


> You could just treat them as friends and not get involved with the religion side of things?
> 
> Andy



This would be my suggestion, too. If you're unsure about the religion, make it clear to them you appreciate their support & friendship but that you don't want to get involved.

If you are interested in getting involved, that's entirely up to you. I would exercise caution (but I hasten to add I would do this with any religion - not just Jehovahs Witnesses).


----------



## Northerner (Nov 3, 2010)

Steffie, I have a lot of experience of the Witnesses. My Grandma and also my Auntie's family were witnesses, plus I worked closely with a man who was also a Witness for 11 years. Whilst they are often very nice people there can also be a very dark side to them. My own advice would be not to become involved in any way. I have read extensively about the religion and there are many things that are good, but also many more things that would make me want to steer clear. 

The religion is based on this theory: the world will come to an end (originally supposed to be 1918 I believe) and all the people who were witnesses will return from the dead. 112,000 people will have a privileged position in the new world, and 12,000 will be elevated to heaven. They are also a bit like a pyramid-selling company - they make a great deal of their money from selling their publications, Awake and the Watchtower. These magazines are given to the people who are most likely like the people you have met and they pay for them then attempt to recoup the money, otherwise it comes out of their own pockets. They also 'tithe' their income, which means they donate a proportion of their earnings to the church.

They don't believe in birthdays or Christmas - they say every day is a celebration of Christ's birthday, and they put their own interpretation on the Bible. I used to know a very scholarly Methodist minister who always relished discussing the bible with them as he could completely demolish their arguments - he had read the original Greek and Latin versions, so knew when they had 'mistranslated' passages to suit their own philosophy.

They have a very poor attitude to women, considering them subservient to men - all the 'higher-ups' are men, plus they have a very acrimonious attitude towards anyone who leaves them or does not obey their strictures.

I could go on, but I think you get the picture. My personal opinion is that they prey on vulnerable people - possibly with good and kind personal motives - but it is essentially a cult religion with an agenda beyond that of providing spiritual support.

I don't mean to offend any members who might be Witnesses. I am always polite and friendly to any I meet, as I always would have wished for my Grandma and Auntie and your religion is your own affair, I am only relating what I know.


----------



## PhilT (Nov 3, 2010)

When I was a teenager I had a friend who was a Jehovahs Witness. His parents were very 'funny' about him having any friends outside of their religion and he was like a virtual prisoner in his home as they hardly ever let him go out any where or do anything. He wasn't even allowed to read comics!

Things may have changed a bit over the years but just be aware that Jehovahs Witnesses dissaprove of many things that we think are normal and take for granted.

Personally I am an atheist so would have nothing to do with any religion, although I don't have a problem with people who do believe in god as long as they don't try to preach to me.


----------



## margie (Nov 3, 2010)

Northerner said:


> Steffie, I have a lot of experience of the Witnesses. My Grandma and also my Auntie's family were witnesses, plus I worked closely with a man who was also a Witness for 11 years. Whilst they are often very nice people there can also be a very dark side to them. My own advice would be not to become involved in any way. I have read extensively about the religion and there are many things that are good, but also many more things that would make me want to steer clear.
> 
> The religion is based on this theory: the world will come to an end (originally supposed to be 1918 I believe) and all the people who were witnesses will return from the dead. 112,000 people will have a privileged position in the new world, and 12,000 will be elevated to heaven. They are also a bit like a pyramid-selling company - they make a great deal of their money from selling their publications, Awake and the Watchtower. These magazines are given to the people who are most likely like the people you have met and they pay for them then attempt to recoup the money, otherwise it comes out of their own pockets. They also 'tithe' their income, which means they donate a proportion of their earnings to the church.
> 
> ...



That is why I posted the link I did - as it is the JW own site and is fairly honest about their beliefs in homosexuality, medical issues and the like. I thought Steffie could read the aspects that may concern her and be outside her own belief system.

I had a friend who would invite Mormons (Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) in, because he knew that they had to spend so many hours a week spreading the word. He felt that by engaging them in conversation he was preventing them knocking on a few peoples doors.


----------



## purpleshadez (Nov 3, 2010)

I have major issues with anyone trying to force their beliefs on to others.

Choosing a religion is a very personal thing to do and, in my opinion, not one to be done lightly at all. As has already been advised by others, do your research!!!

Do not commit to anything if you are unsure or have any doubts.

All the best,

Martin


----------



## Steff (Nov 3, 2010)

Thank you ever so much to everyone, Northey i already sussed there opinion of women was rather diffirent to many other people, but yes i think i will do as andy and duck suggested, and also ty for the link margie


----------



## Steff (Nov 3, 2010)

Caroline said:


> It has to be your choice. Have you told the ladies how you feel? Most are very understanding although it is difficult to turn your back on someone who has helped you through a tough spot.



No ive not told them Caroline but they do seem very approchable, im just to nice lol


----------



## vince13 (Nov 3, 2010)

I have always found JW's who come round to the house to be very pleasant and, having strong religious beliefs myself (and being older than you) it's easier for me to say "you are welcome to come in and have a cuppa but I'm not going to talk long and deep about religion as I'm sure you will accept my commitment to my religion as I respect your beliefs - but I'm not going to convert at my time of life". 

I think they do try to befriend people who are having a hard time (illness and bereavement come to mind) but, having said that, I couldn't stand up for my own faith and take the abuse they so often get, which probably means I am not a very strongly committed Christian (hangs head in shame).

You're a very nice person and don't like hurting their feelings so stick to the cuppa and chats but, unless you want to, go no further I'd say.

Hugs as usual,


----------



## Caroline (Nov 3, 2010)

Steffie said:


> No ive not told them Caroline but they do seem very approchable, im just to nice lol



We need more nice people, although sometimes you need to be firm with people. I keep telling hubby no is an answer too.


----------



## newbs (Nov 3, 2010)

I have always thought, maybe wrongly, that Jehovah Witnesses do not agree with Type 1 diabetics using insulin as my mum told a Jehovah Witness that about my brother several years ago and they said their religion did not allow it (we are talking about 20 years ago but I assume the religion does not change!).  Not sure about medication for Type 2/other illnesses.


----------



## Steff (Nov 3, 2010)

newbs said:


> I have always thought, maybe wrongly, that Jehovah Witnesses do not agree with Type 1 diabetics using insulin as my mum told a Jehovah Witness that about my brother several years ago and they said their religion did not allow it (we are talking about 20 years ago but I assume the religion does not change!).  Not sure about medication for Type 2/other illnesses.



well lorraines sons is on 2 injections of insulin a day...


----------



## MeanMom (Nov 3, 2010)

My husband used to work with someone who was JW and spend 4 hours each day alone in a car with him for 5 years. They talked (as you can imagine) quite a lot about each others beliefs during that time but my husband remains 'un -brainwashed' (if thats a word) - he just valued the guys friendship. 

My daughter had a 'best' friend for two years between 4 and 6 who came from a JW family - K used to feel sorry for her not having birthdays and Christmas - she used to give her friend what she called 'friend' presents instead at random times. The little girl used to say some weird thing about the end of the world etc and some people thought I should put a stop to their friendship, but K liked her and thought what she said was just part of her personality - like her other friend who talked about horses all the time.

I think my point is you can find friendship and support from people you have other common ground with without agreeing with them about everything, or even discussing things you dont want to. Like others have said find out for yourself about what their beliefs are - if you dont agree with them just tell them this firmly if the subject comes up and then change the subject. If they are real friends they will accept this, if they are not then ditch them as you would anyone else who did not respect your feelings

It sounds like they have supported you when you needed it so they cant be all bad.


----------



## katie (Nov 3, 2010)

Well from what Northerner has said I would definitely stay well clear 

My ex boyfriend once spoke to some JW's for aggges once - I told him he should have just said "Sorry, I'm Hindu", but for some reason he didn't even think of it  

Carolyn, It worries me that young people are made to follow these religions  I hope she 'sees the light' when she is old enough to.


----------



## Northerner (Nov 3, 2010)

katie said:


> ...Carolyn, It worries me that young people are made to follow these religions  I hope she 'sees the light' when she is old enough to.



The chap that I worked with had four boys. He took them all out of school when the eldest reached 12 and his wife taught them at home. Now, I have nothing against home tutoring at all - a friend of mine teaches her two daughters and they are absolutely wonderful! - but what struck me about these boys was that they never mixed with other children outside of their religion. I thought this was poor preparation for their adulthood, since they would have a very distorted view of society and how people might behave.


----------



## Ellie Jones (Nov 3, 2010)

JW's do not like you marrying outsiders...

A old work collegue was kicked out by her family, even though her husband to be was more than happy that she continued to follow her faith...  But he refused to become a JW...

My husband's Aunty was brought up in the JW way, left home at 16 to get away from it all...

My personal view is there's got to be something iffy if you got to knock on doors to preach...

If one feels that they need the comfort of faith etc, then there are many church's around where you can go, sit and comtiplate or even attend a service if you wish without having to commit...


----------



## katie (Nov 3, 2010)

Northerner said:


> The chap that I worked with had four boys. He took them all out of school when the eldest reached 12 and his wife taught them at home. Now, I have nothing against home tutoring at all - a friend of mine teaches her two daughters and they are absolutely wonderful! - but what struck me about these boys was that they never mixed with other children outside of their religion. I thought this was poor preparation for their adulthood, since they would have a very distorted view of society and how people might behave.



That is very sad  and makes me quite angry 



Ellie Jones said:


> ...
> 
> If one feels that they need the comfort of faith etc, then there are many church's around where you can go, sit and comtiplate or even attend a service if you wish without having to commit...



Yes, I agree! Seems like a much more healthy way to do things and also gets you out of the house and meeting all sorts of new people


----------



## Flutterby (Nov 3, 2010)

It's difficult when you are a nice person and don't want to upset anyone but just be careful as others have said.  A friend of my mum's got involved with the Jehovah Witnesses when I and this ladies daughter were friends at school.  My mum is a strong Christian and chatted to her a lot about it.  She got so drawn into it that she got to the point where she said if her daughter needed a blood transfusion to save her life she didn't think she could agree to it because of what she'd learned from the JW's.  My mum got someone from her church to go and talk to her and show her the bits of the bible that were being misquoted and she eventually had no more to do with them.  Scary though how an otherwise sensible woman could become so confused.
This doesn't mean they are not nice people but they do have some dangerous ideas.xx


----------



## MeanMom (Nov 3, 2010)

Flutterby said:


> This doesn't mean they are not nice people but they do have some dangerous ideas.xx



You could say that about Catholics (but I wouldnt presume to do so )


----------



## margie (Nov 3, 2010)

People who try and preach to people or to convert them normally have the best of motives and believe that they are helping them.  Some don't know where to stop and some take on a challenge. 

One of my friends went to France with an Anglican Evangelical organisation, his mission to try and convert the Muslims he met to Christianity. 

Its strange that most of my best friends are very religious - not all of the same religion but religious none the less.


----------



## Steff (Nov 3, 2010)

I many be neive but im not stupid, i shall air on the side of caution...


----------



## newbs (Nov 3, 2010)

Steffie said:


> well lorraines sons is on 2 injections of insulin a day...



Ahh, that puts me right on that one then!


----------



## katie (Nov 3, 2010)

carolynsurry said:


> You could say that about Catholics (but I wouldnt presume to do so )



hahaha I'll say it for you!


----------



## Northerner (Nov 3, 2010)

Steffie said:


> I many be neive but im not stupid, i shall air on the side of caution...



Sounds like a good plan to me Steffie. It's a shame that we have to have suspicions about people's good motives. I hope that they are happy just to remain friends.


----------

