# Newly found commitment.....but feeling drained



## Steph Durbin-Wood (Jan 31, 2016)

Hi, I'm determined to get this disease controlled, 27 years since 1st diagnosis as gestational. Then it stuck with me.

Sick of it in my life to be honest, but I know I can't do much about that, so am trying a different tactic.

I went on Day 1 of the T1DE course last week, and am delighted with what I learnt and what difference it can make. So many things that I'd never queried (assumed GP/Consultant knew what they were talking about). About Ketone sticks, needles, sharps bins, travelling, injection sites, Glargine vs. Degludec (definitely asking to be changed onto Deg.)

I've already corrected my basal dose to a stable amount within 4 days (steady steps each day until stable) and carb counting is so much easier than I thought it would be, except:

1. The time it takes - every morsel, every meal (have to do it properly otherwise what's the point. I guess it'll get easier the longer I stick with it.
2. The estimating how much I will eat of my meal. I never eat everything on my plate, but if it's all calculated and injected for then I'm feeling a little aggrieved at having to push through. Although last night I left some, estimated the carbs I'd under-consumed, then topped up with the equivalent in chocolate within an hour. Hey presto post meal readings were spot-on!

I was hoping that I would start feeling better already (effort = investment = payback - right?). Well I don't. I feel totally drained from the whole thing, the effort, the thinking, the medication adjustments, the battling feelings about it all - it's all left me feeling totally overwhelmed so far, really emotional. Some of that might be relief and realisation, because my tiredness this week really does feel both physical and emotional.

Day 2 tomorrow, and I hope that some of other attendees report similar responses so I don't feel  so drained from it all.

I am committed to making this work, really don't want those nasty diabetes damages to start happening to me.

Steph


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## Robin (Jan 31, 2016)

It does get easier. Things you calculate for, if they're things you eat quite often, you'll soon know them by heart, and you'll find you can automatically estimate a portion size by eye. Not wanting to finish what you've calculated for is a problem, but as you've found out, as long as you make it up afterwards you get there in the end. Stick with it, I've found that I have spurts when I really knuckle down and recheck everything, then I relax and get onto autopilot for a bit.
Oh, and welcome to the forum!


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## Steph Durbin-Wood (Jan 31, 2016)

Thanks Robin, I appreciate your encouraging words. I won't quit, but I felt this morning that I really needed to get it off my chest, and Diabetes UK became my new friend


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## Carolg (Jan 31, 2016)

Hi and wrlcome to forum


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## Northerner (Jan 31, 2016)

Hi, welcome to the forum  As Robin says, it does get easier with time and experience - meals you eat frequently you will be able to guesstimate fairly accurately so less brain-work involved! I've actually discovered that most of my meals, whatever they consist of, tend to have a very similar carb content - whether that's potatoes, rice, pasta, bread etc. so I tend to need the same amount of insulin each time! I only really have to think about it if having something out of the ordinary, which, being totally unadventurous, doesn't happen often! 

Timing of insulin is one thing I have found to be very important. Despite its 'rapid' suffix, novorapid can take up to 45 mins to start peaking for me in the mornings, with maybe 25 mins at lunchtime and 15-20 mins in the evenings, so I try and inject those times before actually eating. You need to be cautious and test a lot when finding out how it works for you, but it can really smooth out any post-meal spikes and hugely improve HbA1c  Something you might want to raise on the course, see what they know/say! 

Let us know how tomorrow goes, and if you have any more questions. Have you got a copy of the excellent Type 1 Diabetes in Children Adolescents by Ragnar Hanas? Ignore the title, it's full of great information whatever your age (I'm 57!)


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## Stitch147 (Jan 31, 2016)

Hi and welcome to the forum.


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## Steph Durbin-Wood (Jan 31, 2016)

Carolg said:


> Hi and wrlcome to forum


Thanks Carol


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## Lynn Davies (Jan 31, 2016)

Hi and welcome to the forum Steph.  Plenty of knowledgeable folks round here.


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## Steph Durbin-Wood (Jan 31, 2016)

Stitch147 said:


> Hi and welcome to the forum.


Thanks Stitch147 - love your name I'm a bit of a crafter so that made me smile.


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## Stitch147 (Jan 31, 2016)

I'm a huge Disney fan and my favourite character is Stitch.


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## Steph Durbin-Wood (Jan 31, 2016)

Lynn Davies said:


> Hi and welcome to the forum Steph.  Plenty of knowledgeable folks round here.


Thanks Lynn, I think this is just what I need. 
I've been diabetic for 27 years, and always had medium-good HBA1C control (not very good, but luckily not disastrously bad either) - so to find all this new information last week after years of thinking I was doing it right has set me back a bit. 
I will embrace it, and since last Monday I've been steadfast in my determination to check, weigh, measure and record.


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## Matt Cycle (Jan 31, 2016)

Welcome to the forum Steph.  Friendly advice and support on here.


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## trophywench (Jan 31, 2016)

Steph - after I did my course I actually said 'How the hell have I stayed alive for the last 30 years, not knowing all this stuff?' - and I was only HALF joking.

I also got a bit like you - all this counting weighing calculating is taking over my life with no space for anything else - but rationally I knew it would become a helluva lot easier once the basics had sunk in and as someone else said, when you eat the same things again, even when it isn't every single day.

Mine was spread over 4 weeks too, on a Monday, and by the time you've chatted through all your BG diaries first thing - you really KNOW the others - so it then becomes a day out with your mates!  LOL


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## Steph Durbin-Wood (Jan 31, 2016)

trophywench said:


> Steph - after I did my course I actually said 'How the hell have I stayed alive for the last 30 years, not knowing all this stuff?' - and I was only HALF joking.
> 
> I also got a bit like you - all this counting weighing calculating is taking over my life with no space for anything else - but rationally I knew it would become a helluva lot easier once the basics had sunk in and as someone else said, when you eat the same things again, even when it isn't every single day.
> 
> Mine was spread over 4 weeks too, on a Monday, and by the time you've chatted through all your BG diaries first thing - you really KNOW the others - so it then becomes a day out with your mates!  LOL



Oh wow Trophywench, your post has just perked me up no end, I need to get through this wobbly emotional stage pretty rapid, else I am in fear of showing my vulnerability by crying in front of my new friends tomorrow


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## stephknits (Jan 31, 2016)

Hello from another Steph, and another crafty person too.  I think it is really impressive to go on a course after all these years and be prepared to 'start again'.  No wonder you are feeling emotional about it.  I bet everyone on the course is feeling similarity overwhelmed.  Good luck for tomorrow and let us know how you got on.


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## trophywench (Jan 31, 2016)

Actually Steph - you might be completely wrong about that.  You really ARE NOT the only one that goes through this stage so when you do your diary - TELL them all how you have found it - be absolutely honest.  I'm a person who was brought up to COPE whatever life threw at me.  Well OK - maybe a good idea overall - but not when specifics happen that completely throw me.   We plan in our brains for things we know about - when 'this' happens, I will do that.  And then 'this' does actually happen and we go and react by doing something we never ever dreamt we would!

It isn't 'wrong' or 'stupid' or anything that could raise criticism by anyone who knows anything about the workings of our brain and emotions.  DSNs - and an awful lot or ordinary nurses - know a helluva lot about that you know - otherwise they couldn't do their job with any kind of success!

Good luck with it - and do let us know how the next instalment goes!


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## shanko (Feb 1, 2016)

Hi Steph, i myself have just found renewed enthusiasm for getting this back in control.

It's important to remember that there are always people here that know what you are going through and offer plenty of support.

There will be times when you lapse back, but believe me you will come back from that and you will get back on top of things.

I found that when i did my dafne course a few years back, as trophywench said, you make some great friends and gain support from each other as well as the outstanding care from the healthcare team certainly where i did mine.


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## trophywench (Feb 1, 2016)

Heehee - in December I saw one of 'the girls' in the waiting room at the D clinic - haven't seen her for about 2 years (last time we were both collecting prescriptions from the pharmacy at my GPs, she goes to a different surgery but it's the nearest shop - we had a right old natter!


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