# Hi all, I think it's about time I got some help!



## 1st Paradox

Hi, Im Paul.

2 years ago I was tossed from pillar to post for around 5 months at a really bad doctors surgery (seeing 3 doctors in total maybe a total of around 14 times, with no real diagnosis beyond sleep apnea, an STD (Thrush) and life/work stress. Upon transferring to a new practice (at my initial inspection appointment) I was ordered to go straight to hospital, where I was given fluids (severely dehydrated) and told I had diabetes with a current reading of 27.1.

I will be totally honest here and say that I was a slow starter for self treatment and in understanding my illness, despite research and a high capacity to discern content I was in a state of denial for a long time. However, after 7 or 8 months I came to grips with being a diabetic and accepted my fate as it were. The problem however, is that I have manifested a wide range of coping mechanisms over my life, developing OCD and sticking to regular patterns and processes to aid me in controlling my life, and adapting to a new regime has been nigh on impossible for me. I have tried all the methods you can thing from getting meds out and putting them in front of my usual resting places, to setting alarms and getting told by others, yet, I still struggle greatly with self medication and even just taking readings (almost having a "I have got better things to do atm" attitude to it all).

In relation to my readings I have an average bg reading of around 18-20 throughout the day with at least 3 times a week the meter not being able to give me a result and just says 'HI' (I assume this is because I am above the 32 max that it can display).

I am currently taking 24 mmol Toujeo at 7am (when I remember) and a 2 to 1 ratio of humalog (when I do actually take it).

Now, I honestly believe that there has been an issue of subconscious self harm happening through this time but tonight I exploded at my 4yo for such a little thing it could have passed of as nothing (He almost started crying because the tablet battery was flat and it needed 5 mins charging before it would work. He could not understand why he had to wait so was getting upset that he was not allowed on it). This destroyed me almost instantly, I am not that sort of person... in fact I am in all honesty the complete opposite, I am complacent, quiet, avoid confrontation, have never raised my voice to anyone and am one of the most approachable people you could ever meet.
Now, I am lead to believe through what I have read, that this is common place (the anger) with rapidly fluctuating BG levels, especially those that go high and I have to get a handle on this, so here I am, trying to get as much support as I can.

On a side note and one of better ilk, Im the funny one, I love to have a laugh and joke, to play small pranks and just generally act a little silly all the time... oh yeah, and I'm a Uni Lecturer on a BA(Hons) Games Design degree, have 3 kids (4yo, 10yo, 19yo).

Anyway, thats pretty much me in a nutshell.

Any help and advice is always appreciated and accepted providing it is either critical or quizzical but always helpful.

Thanks for reading


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## Steff

Hi 1st
Firstly welcome to the forum wow those numbers are real high no wonder your flying off the handle i would be . It's quite dangerous to run that high for a long period of time . What's an average days food consumption for you? Glad to see your getting support we all need it from time to time. With regards your meds maybe get yourself an alarm set on your phone being complacent with your meds won't be helping take it from someone who knows I went months not taking mine more then likely the reason I'm now on insulin.
You be kind to yourself and most importantly please keep seeking and taking support given


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## 1st Paradox

Hi Steff,

Thanks for the read through and your thoughts. To be honest, in regards to food, at first I was much like most... thinking I can't eat this and I can't eat that. But my dietitian once said to me... "As a type 1, if you eat a Yoghurt, you will need to inject insulin and if you eat a loaf of bread you will need to inject insulin. Stop worrying about what you're eating and start worrying about how much meds you should be taking" and from this I became much better at my choices of food but have very very very bad eating habits due to a non structured work life I can go all day without stopping (there for not eating and drinking very little) to weekends where my mouth is chewing something every couple of hours.


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## Steff

Hi Paul.
It's best to get into a habit of remembering your meds on a daily basis sorry to say it again but anything we can do to help us stay on the right path we should.
Even if you were to make a packed lunch kind of thing  for work would you still not stop and eat that at least it's with you and you don't have to go searching  a shop for supplies.
If you have a look at the general message board and find a thread called what I ate yesterday there's loads of ideas on that


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## 1st Paradox

Good advice there Steff, just had a quick browse through and there are some inspirational meals in there. I think my main issue is that I have developed my life into that of a workaholics (averaging 18h - 20h per day working on something [High BG means less sleep, with me having no more than 3h a night for the past 2 years {the occasional crash of 10h or so maybe once every few months} , I honestly can't remember that last film I saw or when I last sat and watched a TV series or even episode tbh] causing me to habitually skip meals and then feast in one go. but like you say, this is something I should get more control of and make the time.


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## Steff

It is hard paul alot of us see diabetes as an inconvenience often feeling why should this condition dictate to me why should I inject, test my blood sugar  change my diet etc etc  for it, but it's got its way of bringing us back down to an earth with a bump that's for sure.  What's support like at home? You have a wide variety there of  your kids ages must be hard juggling parenthood around what sounds like a job that takes over your entire days as well.sorry to  say but one day you are just going to burn out you can't continue to run at the levels you mentioned as well as stick to the lifestyle you have now.Our bodies are robust things but not unbreakable.


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## 1st Paradox

Another good point, I still have not reached that point where being diabetic is my first priority, I still put my family, job and students first. In all honesty my partner is great at dealing with our kids while I work or nip off for a nap, but she has very little understanding of my condition (I once asked her "If I collapse... what would you do?" and she said... "I just twist your pen thing up and stab you with it don't I?") so there I am having a hypo and my partner is gonna kill me off lol. In all seriousness, I do feel pretty much alone in dealing with D and as I mentioned in my first post, the subconcious self harm may be a call for help from those close to me, or at the least some recognition of its severity and need of support.


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## Mini-Vicki

Hi Paul, and welcome to the forum  
I'm glad you're here and asking for help, that's a good step in accepting, and controlling your diabetes I think. 
I had a difficult start with diabetes too, so I can empathise with the denial side of things. 
As you know, your levels are extremely high, and will certainly be making you feel awful, and definitely causing mood swings. With numbers like that, you are at a real risk of DKA, do you have a ketone meter to test for ketones? Both your insulins are equally important, but to make you less likely to become ketoacidotic, you must take your basal insulin.
As for work, I have an extremely busy work day too, today I have worked a 15 hour day with a few ten minute breaks. I know this is not healthy but it does happen, but it is important to fit in testing and eating throughout your day, even if only in small breaks. 
Have you been on any diabetes education courses? 
Have you seen a doctor or psychologist about your obsessions? I was lucky enough to be referred to a diabetes psychologist last year who really helped, so it might be worth asking your diabetes health team if this is a facility offered in your area. 
Also Diabetes UK has a helpline if you need to speak to someone  
You absolutely can get back in control of your diabetes, and I believe you will, like I did, feel so much better once your BGs are more normal, and you have regained control.


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## Mini-Vicki

1st Paradox said:


> Another good point, I still have not reached that point where being diabetic is my first priority, I still put my family, job and students first. In all honesty my partner is great at dealing with our kids while I work or nip off for a nap, but she has very little understanding of my condition (I once asked her "If I collapse... what would you do?" and she said... "I just twist your pen thing up and stab you with it don't I?") so there I am having a hypo and my partner is gonna kill me off lol. In all seriousness, I do feel pretty much alone in dealing with D and as I mentioned in my first post, the subconcious self harm may be a call for help from those close to me, or at the least some recognition of its severity and need of support.



I know this is hard to do, but you have to start putting yourself first. I'm the same as you, I will always put other people's needs above my own, to the detriment of my health. I was ill recently because of this constant putting others above me, and my husband said 'it's all very well making yourself sick, but you have to look after your health, because what would I do without you?' So for other people rely on you, you have to be well. 
There are some good books listed in the newbies section, I suggest getting your partner to read one of these, and if possible coming to all Diabetic appointments with you, if possible, so your partner knows what's going on. Hubby comes to all mine, and he's more of an authority on diabetes than me! 
Also definitely teach her what to do if you hypo!


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## Steff

Right well firstly yup been there done that I've been diagnosed since 09 and can tell you for first 2 years I just maybe took my pills maybe twice a week. It sometimes takes a serious incident for us to sit up and take stock of our lives. Harsh as this may sound and before I say it I'm a parent to,you want to be around for your kids and partner for as long as possible dont you. I'd definitely hook your partner up with being more educated on how to help you when you become hypo your life could be in her hands literally x.

It's difficult but put yourself first you deserve it


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## 1st Paradox

Hi Mini-Vicki,

These long days are so hard aren't they! The main issue for me is that during the day, I am constantly surrounded by students or faculty and feel out of sorts 'showcasing my illness' to everyone.

I have been offered the DAFNE course a few times but it collides with my teaching so I am unable to attend (but really do want to go), I do have the ability to test for Ketones but rarely do as when I have they are always in range or low (0.1- 0.4) so suffering the finger prick pain again I feel mostly is for no reason and there for just tend not to.

I was also offered a diabetes psychologist from my Clinic but could never get an appointment to marry up with my time out of class. Again, putting my job before my health.

That helpline is great to know of, it was only 2 days ago that I said in a state of despair to someone that ' I think I'm just one of those people that needs to accept that I'm a dead man walking as I will never be able to get control of my D'


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## Mini-Vicki

Whilst our jobs are important, your health is more so. If you become ill through not looking after yourself, you won't be able to work anyway. 
You have every right to appointments, even during work time, technically, under employment law diabetes is considered a disability. Whilst I would never think of myself as having a disability, it is useful for knowing that for work reasons. The helpline has more information on that too. Give them a call  
I'd highly recommend DAFNE, and taking your partner along too, but if you can't manage it at the moment, there's a similar course called BERTIE, which I think Plymouth or Portsmouth hospital run online (I can remember which, I'm sure someone will be along soon who knows!) so that would help in the meantime. 
See the diabetes psychologist, honestly it was invaluable to me in accepting as controlling my diabetes. 
You are certainly not a dead man walking, you have all the means to control your diabetes, you just need to use them appropriately, and learn to look after yourself.  When I was not in control of my diabetes I was emotionally in a much, much worse place, I almost lost my husband because of it. Now I have regained control, and I know what my body is doing things are a hundred times better. You'll probably find you will feel better too


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## 1st Paradox

Thank you both so much for your kind words and advice so far. To be completely transparent, after taking my Tujeo at 7 am this morning, I have not tested or treated all day and after today's incident with my little man and how it made me feel I did not feel like I needed to test and treat but just felt like I deserved to feel as ill as I did for what I had just done to him. However, just speaking to you two has prompted me to test (25.2) and treat (8 mmol) so with a little luck I may get more than 3h sleep tonight and feel good in the morning.

I know I need to get to grips with control and just cannot understand why I am finding it so hard. Even when I know I should check and inject in that exact moment of time, I just don't.

I am in a medical mess atm with my D
Constantly thirsty, Have severe dry flaky skin on my face and head, the skin on/over my kidneys/lower back is severely dry, vision constantly loses focus/goes blurry, have crazy headaches and have had thrush solidly for 2 years now with no sign of it letting up, and finally I get stabbing pains in some of my organs on occasion: Kidneys, Intestines etc. and the cramps in my feet and shins, oh my gosh, the cramps are ridiculously painful and persistent, they even fight each other on my feet... so If it starts on the bottom of my foot curling my toes down and I stretch them out and up, then cramp in the top of my foot kicks in and there is no escape anymore until it feels ready to subside.

Thanks again for tonight. Ill be back on tomorrow after work (during if I get 5 mins peace).


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## Steff

Yes get off here and try and get a good night's sleep LOL
Work do know   your diabetic yes


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## zx10pilot

Hi Paul,
Welcome to the site. I hope you don't feel quite so alone now, the amount of support available on here is brilliant and there is pretty much always someone around who "gets it" if you need to have a rant about D.
It sounds to me like you do need to start considering yourself a bit more as the levels you are describing do seem extremely high.
When I was first diagnosed I had similar problems (blurred vision, cramps, tiredness etc) but once my levels were more under control I felt sooooo much better and my moods are also alot more stable. And my 5yo definitely appreciates the fact I have more energy now!
Good luck with everything & see you around 
zx


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## James 048

Hi Paul 
Just want to wish you well on your journey ahead , @Steff  and @Mini-Vicki  have gave you good sound advice . Really hope to take time out and get well again .


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## grovesy

Welcome.


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## Grannylorraine

Welcome


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## Lucy Honeychurch

Hi and welcome, it sounds like you really need some help, please get some.


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## Steff

Hi Paul,
How has today gone did you find a smitghen of time to eat and test ?
Hope so


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## Amigo

Hi Paradox (you're well named incidentally). I feel for your situation because it's complex and seems complicated by psychological drivers too. 
However, you've presented us the problems very articulately and also the solutions but then given many reasons why you can't implement them. I'm finding that frustrating and a bit scary for you and your family if I'm honest. 
Work isn't an excuse it seems, it's a denial technique. Not taking your medication is no more an option than forgetting to breathe. 
Nobody ever had inscribed on their tombstone, 'I wish I'd spent more time at work'. You're entitled to breaks and special adjustments to be made to your working schedule and you need to take them. It doesn't detract from your value or make you a lesser person. It just ensures you stay alive and never again take it out on your son. Something I know you bitterly regret. 

Your wife needs to go on a Diabetes Awareness Course. Go together and to hell with the students that day. They'll survive without you but your family might not!

Sorry to sound harsh but your medical problems are mounting and your choices are nil. You need to take your meds and excuses are just excuses. Sorry


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## PhoebeC

Hi and welcome.
This group is a lifeline!

Firstly I don't want to patronise but if you go on with those levels and habits then you are not going to be as healthy as you are now for very long, and it sounds like your having a hellish time. 

You need to put your diabetes first otherwise there won't be a you. It's that simple.

Before there was insulin people had no treatment and where lucky to live a week. 

How I think of it is when you are on a plane and they say your life best/oxygen make first before helping others. Your body first or you will be no use to anyone.

It's all about habits and if you are OCD you are good at habits, so need to be OCD with diabetes. You need to be addicted to your levels and carbs to get them sorted. I'd say you can use that to your advantage. 

It sounds to be like you are still in denial and if they have offered you support take it. We don't get enough support now so take all you get offered.

We are all here for you there's no stupid question, and you can do it. It's not the end of your life, it's now easy but it's the hand you have been given. 

You've survived 100% every challenge you have faced so this is just another one. 

Take each day as you can.

It doesn't need to stop you doing anything, and you do have some control over it even if it feels impossible.
Xx


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## 1st Paradox

Hey Steff, I have been a good boy, kinda...

I took all morning meds, but did not get chance to eat until 12, I had some graduates in so we went out for a meal (chinese restaurant) and a catch up but in doing this I forgot to check my bloods and medicate first. However, I did do it as soon as I got back into work. so all is well. Just got home now and to be honest am exhausted (only got 2 hours sleep last night) Gonna have me an omelette and hit the sack I think.

Quick question if anyone can answer though...

I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva Expert and I have noticed that when inputting data is has an option for post meal. So what I am wondering is what this means. Is the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!


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## PhoebeC

1st Paradox said:


> I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva ExpertIs the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
> It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!


What are your levels? Did you have the Meds when you ate? 
My meter is just a result nothing else, so I cantbhel with that. but I carb count myself and use an app to record the details.


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## 1st Paradox

Amigo said:


> Hi Paradox (you're well named incidentally). I feel for your situation because it's complex and seems complicated by psychological drivers too.
> However, you've presented us the problems very articulately and also the solutions but then given many reasons why you can't implement them. I'm finding that frustrating and a bit scary for you and your family if I'm honest.
> Work isn't an excuse it seems, it's a denial technique. Not taking your medication is no more an option than forgetting to breathe.
> Nobody ever had inscribed on their tombstone, 'I wish I'd spent more time at work'. You're entitled to breaks and special adjustments to be made to your working schedule and you need to take them. It doesn't detract from your value or make you a lesser person. It just ensures you stay alive and never again take it out on your son. Something I know you bitterly regret.
> 
> Your wife needs to go on a Diabetes Awareness Course. Go together and to hell with the students that day. They'll survive without you but your family might not!
> 
> Sorry to sound harsh but your medical problems are mounting and your choices are nil. You need to take your meds and excuses are just excuses. Sorry



Hi Amigo,

You are totally right, that is one of the reasons I have joined up here and am trying to get as much support as possible, last night's incident has made me realise that I have been a fool and need to get my life back on track. I had an extremely difficult time during my diagnosis with other family matters that caused me to become depressed, this resulted in what I mentioned perviously about subconciously self harming, and I suppose I am just now getting better and trying to sort my life out.

Thank you for the harsh words, they are a good thing to hear and nice that you care so much to actually say them.


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## 1st Paradox

PhoebeC said:


> What are your levels? Did you have the Meds when you ate?
> My meter is just a result nothing else, so I cantbhel with that. but I carb count myself and use an app to record the details.



Hi Phoebe,

Thanks for your kind words, My levels today have been as follows...
01:44am 15.3
03:30am 14.7 (2u)
06:55am 13.3 (1u)
09:37am 15.8 (2u)
---
13:11pm 24.7 (13u)
16:53pm 11.4


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## SB2015

1st Paradox said:


> I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva Expert and I have noticed that when inputting data is has an option for post meal. So what I am wondering is what this means. Is the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
> It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!



I also used an accucheck Avila Expert for many years, and there is an algorithm in the handset that works it whether you need a correction based on his w long ago your u told it the carbs you were eating or had just eaten.  That is why it is important to tell it all the information then it can help you.

The label for post meal on a test is there for people who like to test again say 2 hours after a meal to see if they are then heading in the right direction.  By labelling your readings you can review them in bunches.  I think that that is for a later date from reading this thread.  For now I think you just need to start to looking after yourself by making sure that you inject each time you eat as well as doing the background insulin (Tuejo I think you said).

You already know that your levels are high and have come on here because you want help.  As a teacher I was given a week with full pay to attend DAFNE.  It was well worth it and having done the course I would have taken leave without pay if necessafor the benefit I got from it.  It gave me back the control I wanted and taught me how to adjust doses.  It may be worth asking if you could go on DAFNE and once the week is booked it would then be more difficult to call it off.

Look after yourself for your childrens' sake if not for yourself.


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## Steff

1st Paradox said:


> Hey Steff, I have been a good boy, kinda...
> 
> I took all morning meds, but did not get chance to eat until 12, I had some graduates in so we went out for a meal (chinese restaurant) and a catch up but in doing this I forgot to check my bloods and medicate first. However, I did do it as soon as I got back into work. so all is well. Just got home now and to be honest am exhausted (only got 2 hours sleep last night) Gonna have me an omelette and hit the sack I think.
> 
> Quick question if anyone can answer though...
> 
> I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva Expert and I have noticed that when inputting data is has an option for post meal. So what I am wondering is what this means. Is the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
> It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!


Well it's something I guess but careful Chinese can be lethal for your levels lots of sticky sauces etc . Please try and make it your priority to get back and on the straight and narrow.  You get one life make the very best of it x


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## Ditto

Hello and welcome to the forum. Lots of help and advice to be had here thank goodness.


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## PhoebeC

1st Paradox said:


> Hi Phoebe,
> 
> Thanks for your kind words, My levels today have been as follows...
> 01:44am 15.3
> 03:30am 14.7 (2u)
> 06:55am 13.3 (1u)
> 09:37am 15.8 (2u)
> ---
> 13:11pm 24.7 (13u)
> 16:53pm 11.4


Do you have a team you can call? 

If I'm above 12 I do a correction does. 
Has that been explained to you? 

Results that high really are too high, and 24 is hospital high.

Have you got ketones? You must have at that level. Ketones need actual treatment.

Take care xx


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## Mini-Vicki

Hey Paradox,
I'm glad today has been slightly better for you  
Have you been taught about carb counting and correction doses? 
If you really can't get to a DAFNE course (and I really do highly recommend them) maybe schedule an appointment with your DSN to discuss doses again


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## 1st Paradox

PhoebeC said:


> Do you have a team you can call?
> 
> If I'm above 12 I do a correction does.
> Has that been explained to you?
> 
> Results that high really are too high, and 24 is hospital high.
> 
> Have you got ketones? You must have at that level. Ketones need actual treatment.
> 
> Take care xx



Hey, yeah I have been told about corrections and shown what to do... It is worth noting that my Dietitian has set my levels goal to be higher than the expected range due to 2 years of being around 18 mmol average she fears that I may hypo at a higher level. This is confirmed with the odd occasion I have been lower than my average and felt ill at around a 6.

My plan is to go back to the start as it where. I gonna make an appointment to see the specialist, dietitian and gp and tell em all I wish to start over. Re learn what I need to be doing etc, get on those courses and take control of my health for the first time.


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## Northerner

1st Paradox said:


> Hey, yeah I have been told about corrections and shown what to do... It is worth noting that my Dietitian has set my levels goal to be higher than the expected range due to 2 years of being around 18 mmol average she fears that I may hypo at a higher level. This is confirmed with the odd occasion I have been lower than my average and felt ill at around a 6.
> 
> My plan is to go back to the start as it where. I gonna make an appointment to see the specialist, dietitian and gp and tell em all I wish to start over. Re learn what I need to be doing etc, get on those courses and take control of my health for the first time.


That sounds like an excellent plan, and you've already taken a big step and shown the determination to pull yourself out of the pit  Even though a course will take time away from your other activities, it will be worth its weight in gold to meet others who have probably been in the same position, facing similar challenges - often this contact is the most valuable aspect of a course, what you learn is a bonus! 

If you want something that may help in the meantime, there is an online carb counting course at:

https://www.bertieonline.org.uk/

There's also a lot of excellent resources available at https://www.t1resources.uk/home/

And finally, it really might be a good idea to just call the Diabetes UK helpline and have a chat:

https://www.diabetes.org.uk/helpline

Let us know how you go on


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## Steff

Paul.
I hope you have a good weekend matey


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## PhoebeC

Makes sense everyone has their own plan. 
I'd still speak to them about corrections when your over that 18 though. Numbers like 24 are what people are diagnosed at when they are severely ill. 
Do you have ketones all the time? 
Please just make your health top priority, it's not worth the risk.


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## SB2015

1st Paradox said:


> Hey, yeah I have been told about corrections and shown what to do... It is worth noting that my Dietitian has set my levels goal to be higher than the expected range due to 2 years of being around 18 mmol average she fears that I may hypo at a higher level. This is confirmed with the odd occasion I have been lower than my average and felt ill at around a 6.
> 
> My plan is to go back to the start as it where. I gonna make an appointment to see the specialist, dietitian and gp and tell em all I wish to start over. Re learn what I need to be doing etc, get on those courses and take control of my health for the first time.



Great that you are planning to make a new start.  Use all the help that is available to you fromyour team and keep asking on here.


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## Northerner

Just another thought - I'd highly recommend getting a copy of Type 1 Diabetes in Children Adolescents and Young People by Ragnar Hanas, it covers all aspects of living with diabetes and might help fill in some gaps or prompt questions when you see your team, I know I have found it extremely useful (I was 49 when diagnosed, so relevant whatever your age! )


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## 1st Paradox

Thanks to you all for the help, support and advice. I am determined to get on track with this thing call Diabetes, I realise now that if my family, friends and students do really mean to me what I say they do then taking care of number 1 is my priority as that will ensure I can put them Sub-first (dont think thats a real term but it should be).

I have just sent mail out to my local clinic to contact me for an appointment asap. Should hear back on Monday fingers crossed.


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## Steff

Fingers crossed to. Keep us updated will be great to see you gripping this diabetes around the neck and telling yourself I can do this.


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## Wirrallass

Hi Paul and welcome to the forum. I'm so glad you sought help here - tho you may not have realised it at the time - I believe this was your first step to realising & accepting that you have diabetes - I echo the words of advice from the forum members above - you are not alone re: your denial - I too went into denial after being diagnosed and was in denial for 8 - 9 months until I joined this forum. The kind folk here helped me to accept my T2 diabetes - for which I am ever grateful - Paul - there is no limit as to the help - support & advice you will receive here. I wish you well on your diabetes journey


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## Ditto

Excellent. We've just got to accept it and knuckle down to it, getting as healthy as possible is the thing. Read as much as we can, stay informed. I'm still in denial but getting there.


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## Lucy Honeychurch

1st Paradox said:


> Thanks to you all for the help, support and advice. I am determined to get on track with this thing call Diabetes, I realise now that if my family, friends and students do really mean to me what I say they do then taking care of number 1 is my priority as that will ensure I can put them Sub-first (dont think thats a real term but it should be).
> 
> I have just sent mail out to my local clinic to contact me for an appointment asap. Should hear back on Monday fingers crossed.




All the best, you'll get there soon


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## SB2015

Well done paradox for taking the first step.
I hope that they get back to you soon.


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## 1st Paradox

PhoebeC said:


> Makes sense everyone has their own plan.
> I'd still speak to them about corrections when your over that 18 though. Numbers like 24 are what people are diagnosed at when they are severely ill.
> Do you have ketones all the time?
> Please just make your health top priority, it's not worth the risk.



Another honest moment from me... I never check as I am sure I do have ketones constantly and am too afraid to know. I say never. I have started to check as of Thursday, and yes they are there. it is something I am not all that familiar with... all I know really is that they are bad for you. I have been taking readings of...

1.6
1.2
0.7
0.4
0.4
0.3
0.1


----------



## Lucy Honeychurch

I'm not surprised you've got ketones as your bs are very high. Have you read up on diabetic ketoacidosis?


----------



## Kaylz

Anything up to 0.6 is normal or this is what I was told, anything over you should take extra insulin, drink plenty of water and keep checking I'm not 100% sure but I think I was told if it was a reading above 1.5 you should take extra insulin get drinking a pint of water and call for medical help x


----------



## 1st Paradox

Lucy Honeychurch said:


> I'm not surprised you've got ketones as your bs are very high. Have you read up on diabetic ketoacidosis?



I have but to be honest I'm not 100% sure what to do about high levels. From my understanding if I have high BG then insulin and exercise are best to bring it down but exercise causes Ketones which are clearly very bad. So what is the best action to take for ketones while high? Just water?


----------



## Lucy Honeychurch

I'm not very knowledgeable about it all, but I think ketones from exercise are different from the ketones when your bs is high. Hopefully someone who knows more about it will come along. The thing is your basal insulin may need to be higher, but its hard to tell if you don't inject it regularly. How many units of Toujeo are you on?


----------



## sean penguin

I wasn't lucky enough to have a diagnosis until it nearly killed me, quite frankly youll be foolish to not get a grip on things. dka is highly unpleasant, and you really will wish you got your act together


----------



## Lucy Honeychurch

I see you're on 24 units of Toujeo. I hope you're remembering to take it everyday now, if you are you need to test regularly to see if you need more, or indeed less. When you see your DSN discuss it with them.
Sean is right, DKA is horrible and can be fatal, I nearly ended up in critical care when I had it, that's when I was diagnosed.


----------



## 1st Paradox

The one point when I had a smidgen of control was during a trial run of the FreeStyle Libre scan device thing. I have just received some private client work that will enable me to 'afford' this device again for a good few months/a year or so, and am seriously considering it.

What I'm wondering is if I should hold off until I get better control on my own with the standard prick testing or if you think it would be better to use it to teach me better what I should be doing RE monitoring levels.
Seems like an odd question now I have written it down but I'm not sure if the convenience of the device will cause me to 'lose' something in regards to my own understanding or if it will aid it.

Thoughts?


----------



## Lucy Honeychurch

I've never used one, but would love one, but can't afford it.


----------



## SB2015

If you can afford to use the Libre it can be very helpful, but only if you know what to do about readings that are too high.  With your level of BGs and evidence of ketones, you definitely need to get your basal insulin sorted.  This will be very difficult if you are not taking it regularly, so I would start by getting your insulin regime more consistent, get an appointment with DSN asap and see how soon you can get onto the DAFNE course, or at least look at the online course from Bournemouth (Bertie) whilst waiting for it.

The longer you have BGs out of range the more damage you will be diong to your blood vessels, and so developing the long term problems that can come with Diabetes

Your have committed yourself to get things back on track which is brilliant.
We ae here to help in any way that we can to help you get back to self managing your Diabetes.


----------



## PhoebeC

1st Paradox said:


> I have but to be honest I'm not 100% sure what to do about high levels. From my understanding if I have high BG then insulin and exercise are best to bring it down but exercise causes Ketones which are clearly very bad. So what is the best action to take for ketones while high? Just water?



Those levels of ketones under 1.0 are normal, its the ones over that which are damaging. Water and insulin is what you need. And i also agree with Kaylz at those levels you need medical advice, quickly. 

If your levels are high exercise will not help you out, only insulin will work. When levels are as high as yours then your body doesn't know what to do to sort itself out. And exercising will only make you go higher and put yourself at more risk.
If i exercise with levels over 11 I go higher.

The way your levels are at the moment I would advise against all exercise. 

I hope you have been getting better results, if I was getting levels like yours I would be asking to go into hospital. 

Please take car

. Something I noticed on an advert by the BBC before made me think of you. 'There's only 1 you' that's so true, you have your body and that's all you have, if you don't look after it it wont last.


----------



## PhoebeC

How you getting on 1st Paradox?


----------



## 1st Paradox

PhoebeC said:


> How you getting on 1st Paradox?


Hi, sorry for my quietness the past couple of days, had a bit of a bad time RE relationship.

Things are a lot better, not perfect but definitely better. I have been on top of my meds, got appointment with Diabetes Dietitian on the 12th Apr, have been well below my average reading of 18, closer to 12 now have been sleeping. Never mentioned this before but for the past 2 years I have had no more than 3 hours sleep a night with the occasional (once every few months) 6h crash.

I am feeling good and am more alive than before.


----------



## Kaylz

1st Paradox said:


> Hi, sorry for my quietness the past couple of days, had a bit of a bad time RE relationship.
> 
> Things are a lot better, not perfect but definitely better. I have been on top of my meds, got appointment with Diabetes Dietitian on the 12th Apr, have been well below my average reading of 18, closer to 12 now have been sleeping. Never mentioned this before but for the past 2 years I have had no more than 3 hours sleep a night with the occasional (once every few months) 6h crash.
> 
> I am feeling good and am more alive than before.


Glad to hear you are feeling a bit better and getting those numbers down , no lecture from me but just a 'stick at it' as by the way your feeling now you'll already realise it's the best thing to do, concentrate on getting yourself and your health sorted before anything else like work PLEASE, and keep us up to date on how things are going  x


----------



## 1st Paradox

Kaylz said:


> Glad to hear you are feeling a bit better and getting those numbers down , no lecture from me but just a 'stick at it' as by the way your feeling now you'll already realise it's the best thing to do, concentrate on getting yourself and your health sorted before anything else like work PLEASE, and keep us up to date on how things are going  x


Aww, thanks,

I most definitely will.


----------



## Lucy Honeychurch

Good to hear you're sleeping better and getting a handle on things 
Sorry to hear of your relationship woes, hope you can sort it.


----------



## zx10pilot

Hi Paul,
Really glad to hear you are starting to get more control, and I'm sure you'll carry on feeling a bit better each day as your levels continue to come down.
I hope you get your other problems resolved as well.
Regards
zx


----------



## 1st Paradox

All good at home now (ish), And still feeling much better, yanno... after all this time in denial and self loathing of my bodys betrayal, it really is nice to start feeling almost normal again. I tell ya, the amount of issues I was having and brushing off with "it's just old age kicking in haha" was ridiculous. So glad I'm not being that fool anymore already!


----------



## trophywench

God helps them, that help themselves !  I'm not 'religious' but have to say - I've always found it to be true.

Onwards - and DOWNwards for a change - with your BG that is, LOL


----------



## PhoebeC

zx10pilot said:


> Hi Paul,
> Really glad to hear you are starting to get more control, and I'm sure you'll carry on feeling a bit better each day as your levels continue to come down.
> I hope you get your other problems resolved as well.
> Regards
> zx


Sleep is so important to general health. Most people forget this. Even those who eat right, exercise and are very healthy are cutting themselves short by not sleeping. Its not given enough thought by most people.

Great to hear your levels are improving. Just keep it up.


----------



## 1st Paradox

Ok so... I have a bit of a hectic day today, already been at work for over 2 hours (don't technically start till 10), Have 3 interviews to get done for new students, I've got a night class for 2 hours starting at 5, got 2 private client meetings in the middle of the day and at some point I need to pay my family some attention.

I need to ensure I eat (just had breakfast) in the midst of all this chaos.

Anyway... onto point...

I also have my appointment with the dietitian today at 3, need to get my head sorted and ensure I cover every thing I need to, let on about the good news of me being an adult about my condition and just generally get the additional help in place and start acting on it asap. Wish me luck, I'll update tonight.

Suppose with such a chaotic day I'm just naming stuff so that I don't forget. So hear goes...

Discuss my denial and ignorance/poor self care/management.
Talk about high blood glucose readings and what I have been doing to get it down. Ask for help and more advice in this regard. ( I think I may need an adjustment to be honest)
Lack of sleep and tiredness.
Stress and its effects on my body.
Arrange Diabetic specialist counseling.
Get appointment with Specialist in place.

[EDIT]
Differing meal times due to hectic working days.

Anything I'm missing any thoughts on additional things I should ask her?


----------



## Kaylz

Sounds like a good list of stuff to me, how about times of your meals due to different things happening each day etc x


----------



## 1st Paradox

Kaylz said:


> Sounds like a good list of stuff to me, how about times of your meals due to different things happening each day etc x


Good Idea, Will add to list


----------



## Greyhound Gal

Hi. Have you been keeping a food and BG level log? If so, be good to show this, or if not, you could let her know the kinds of things you have been eating and when, and when during the day your BG have been high or low e.g. when missed a meal, when gone long time between meals, not long after a meal etc.


----------



## Kaylz

Completely agree with @Greyhound Gal, I also made a note of testing different foods with my bs before, units taken, bs 2 hours after if I had anything in between then my bs 4 or 5 hours later x


----------



## trophywench

This is an initial meeting, and with a dietitian, not any sort of 'medic' - so they won't be able to deal with all of what's on the shopping list - eg BP medication - we need our GPs for that unless we're in-patients - but hopefully he can get himself back into the system so he can get everything sorted.

Hope it goes well, good luck!


----------



## Steff

Good luck today Paul


----------



## 1st Paradox

Ok, ok so I'm back home after a stressful day educating the masses, did my 2 private meetings with clients, did my night class (ended my night class early). I had a great half hour appointment with Fran (my dietician) that actually lasted 1h 40mins and the results are to follow. And am all set to sit and play with the kids for the next hour or so until bed time.

My hba1c is crazy high >130 they told me the meter only reads up to 130 and Im higher then that.
My average BG has come right down and is sitting around 13-15 (used to be in the 20s).
Ketones at 0.1, all good here 

Got to have good chats about everything from diet and insulin to health in general, sleep and even other support routes.

Basically I am signed up to dafne in may if they have a cancellation, they have booked me in to see specialist in june, I have another appointment with Fran in a month to keep me in check and retest hba1c.

She has advised that I do not rush my levels down as it could cause problems with my nerves and eyes due to the shock/strain I would put my body under. She wants me to sit at an average BG of 15 until our next meeting. I am booked into see the diabetes specialist counsellor, have contact for a local support group and phone number for emergency support.

She said I'm ok to carry on as I am with the hectic lifestyle of work, so long as I do eat during the day and has advised a night time walk to help lower my BG prior to bed , de-stress, wind down and make my body a little tired (I teach from a computer to am not all that active) so that I sleep better. She has offered for my partner to come along to the next meeting and any from this point onwards to gain some knowledge and explained the potential damage I may have /could cause by constantly being in the range I was. She was truly amazing and I feel like a bit of a TXXT for not doing this sooner and basically making her feel like I was a lost cause.

Great day overall, I'm so happy right now


----------



## Amigo

1st Paradox said:


> Ok, ok so I'm back home after a stressful day educating the masses, did my 2 private meetings with clients, did my night class (ended my night class early). I had a great half hour appointment with Fran (my dietician) that actually lasted 1h 40mins and the results are to follow. And am all set to sit and play with the kids for the next hour or so until bed time.
> 
> My hba1c is crazy high >130 they told me the meter only reads up to 130 and Im higher then that.
> My average BG has come right down and is sitting around 13-15 (used to be in the 20s).
> Ketones at 0.1, all good here
> 
> Got to have good chats about everything from diet and insulin to health in general, sleep and even other support routes.
> 
> Basically I am signed up to dafne in may if they have a cancellation, they have booked me in to see specialist in june, I have another appointment with Fran in a month to keep me in check and retest hba1c.
> 
> She has advised that I do not rush my levels down as it could cause problems with my nerves and eyes due to the shock/strain I would put my body under. She wants me to sit at an average BG of 15 until our next meeting. I am booked into see the diabetes specialist counsellor, have contact for a local support group and phone number for emergency support.
> 
> She said I'm ok to carry on as I am with the hectic lifestyle of work, so long as I do eat during the day and has advised a night time walk to help lower my BG prior to bed , de-stress, wind down and make my body a little tired (I teach from a computer to am not all that active) so that I sleep better. She has offered for my partner to come along to the next meeting and any from this point onwards to gain some knowledge and explained the potential damage I may have /could cause by constantly being in the range I was. She was truly amazing and I feel like a bit of a TXXT for not doing this sooner and basically making her feel like I was a lost cause.
> 
> Great day overall, I'm so happy right now



She's sounds like a very well informed dietician there Paradox! I'm quite surprised at the level of diabetic management advice she gave. All the dietician told me was 'eat more fruit!'


----------



## Lucy Honeychurch

It's good you're accessing the medical help you need, my levels were around the same as yours are now after I was diagnosed and mine were reduced gradually too. Wishing you all the best


----------



## mikeyB

I've been hanging off the thread, but I'm pleased that you have finally realised that there are some things in life that are more important than being too busy. You've made a great start to getting yourself sorted - the graveyards are full of folk who were too busy - but you absolutely have to get those blood glucose levels down. That should be your main focus at the moment. It should be second nature, not a burden. Do not miss out on any appointments or courses you are offered. Your employer has, by law, to make accommodations for your disability. 

Keep up the good work you have started, because the alternative is rapidly accumulating all the complications that this condition can cause, most of which are life changing. I would say best of luck, but luck has got nothing to do with it. Best of effort is probably better.

But I do wish you all the best in your efforts.


----------



## trophywench

Oh Wow! - I'm really pleased she was able to cover a lot more than I thought she'd be able to!

Onwards and downwards !!


----------



## Lindarose

I'm so pleased you've started to look after yourself paradox. And I bet your family are too! I really wish you all the best with the new life you're now working on and look forward to hearing your progress.


----------



## Steff

Hi Paul. 
It's great to see since when you first posted 10 days or so ago that things are starting to look up for you. Small baby steps and before long you will be gliding along .


----------



## 1st Paradox

mikeyB said:


> I've been hanging off the thread, but I'm pleased that you have finally realised that there are some things in life that are more important than being too busy. You've made a great start to getting yourself sorted - the graveyards are full of folk who were too busy - but you absolutely have to get those blood glucose levels down. That should be your main focus at the moment. It should be second nature, not a burden. Do not miss out on any appointments or courses you are offered. Your employer has, by law, to make accommodations for your disability.
> 
> Keep up the good work you have started, because the alternative is rapidly accumulating all the complications that this condition can cause, most of which are life changing. I would say best of luck, but luck has got nothing to do with it. Best of effort is probably better.
> 
> But I do wish you all the best in your efforts.


Yeah, I totally get it now, just glad it's not too late. I feel better about the whole situation now and am determined to get this sorted. Thanks Mike.



trophywench said:


> Oh Wow! - I'm really pleased she was able to cover a lot more than I thought she'd be able to!
> 
> Onwards and downwards !!


She has always been extremely knowledgable, and it really feels good to be in a situation where every word she speaks to me, I understand and WILL follow.



Lindarose said:


> I'm so pleased you've started to look after yourself paradox. And I bet your family are too! I really wish you all the best with the new life you're now working on and look forward to hearing your progress.


Thanks Linda, I will keep you all updated and will be more vigilant from this point forwards.



Steff said:


> Hi Paul.
> It's great to see since when you first posted 10 days or so ago that things are starting to look up for you. Small baby steps and before long you will be gliding along .


Thanks Steff, I just read through this entire thread and it is amazing to see how far I have come since that first post. As D:Ream said... "Things can only get better if we see it through".


----------



## New-journey

Hi Paul, so good to read of your changed attitude and commitment to your health despite the other challenges you have. .I send my support and do let us know how you are doing, any questions or updates are always welcome here. I just read the whole thread and it is amazing how far you have come! Brilliant to see.


----------



## SB2015

An excellent appointment Paul and good plans in place for future support.
As you say reading from the start this is massive progress.
Well done for making such a good start to your new normal life.

I found it very useful to have my husband with me at early appointments as he would remember things that I had forgotten during was also good at reminding me about realistic expectations.


----------



## stephknits

You are right, what a change of attitude in such a short period of time.  Great news.  The DAFNE is so worth while doing, not least because you meet other type 1s each of whom will have had their ups and downs.  I did mine almost a year ago and we meet up in the pub.  Three of us have gone on to get the same pump and can support each other with that.  Keep us posted


----------



## 1st Paradox

stephknits said:


> You are right, what a change of attitude in such a short period of time.  Great news.  The DAFNE is so worth while doing, not least because you meet other type 1s each of whom will have had their ups and downs.  I did mine almost a year ago and we meet up in the pub.  Three of us have gone on to get the same pump and can support each other with that.  Keep us posted


Good to hear, the more support the better for me I think. Really looking forwards to it.


----------



## Neety41

1st Paradox said:


> Thank you both so much for your kind words and advice so far. To be completely transparent, after taking my Tujeo at 7 am this morning, I have not tested or treated all day and after today's incident with my little man and how it made me feel I did not feel like I needed to test and treat but just felt like I deserved to feel as ill as I did for what I had just done to him. However, just speaking to you two has prompted me to test (25.2) and treat (8 mmol) so with a little luck I may get more than 3h sleep tonight and feel good in the morning.
> 
> I know I need to get to grips with control and just cannot understand why I am finding it so hard. Even when I know I should check and inject in that exact moment of time, I just don't.
> 
> I am in a medical mess atm with my D
> Constantly thirsty, Have severe dry flaky skin on my face and head, the skin on/over my kidneys/lower back is severely dry, vision constantly loses focus/goes blurry, have crazy headaches and have had thrush solidly for 2 years now with no sign of it letting up, and finally I get stabbing pains in some of my organs on occasion: Kidneys, Intestines etc. and the cramps in my feet and shins, oh my gosh, the cramps are ridiculously painful and persistent, they even fight each other on my feet... so If it starts on the bottom of my foot curling my toes down and I stretch them out and up, then cramp in the top of my foot kicks in and there is no escape anymore until it feels ready to subside.
> 
> Thanks again for tonight. Ill be back on tomorrow after work (during if I get 5 mins peace).


Sorry to be the bearer of miserableness but u are very high risk of losing ur feet, sight and kidney function if u don't sort it and quickly x


----------



## trophywench

Neety - I think you need to read the whole thread, from which you will see that is exactly what Paul is doing - and he actually knew what you said all along - which is why he came here in the first place!


----------



## Steff

Neety41 said:


> Sorry to be the bearer of miserableness but u are very high risk of losing ur feet, sight and kidney function if u don't sort it and quickly x


Hi.
Just wanted to say being one of the first who spent alot of time posting with Paul back and forth on the start of this thread that he has came along way dealing with everything he first told us. I think jumping in with your feet comments etc is a tad harsh.  Did you read the entire thread


----------



## 1st Paradox

Hey peeps,

So, just need a little rant I suppose... Had a very bad day at work with students bitching and moaning then got a telling off (First time I have ever been told off in my adult career in 20 years) for just doing my job by my line manager, (I don't really want to get into all the nitty gritty ness of it in such a public place but I think it was jealousy related) to do with the rapport I have with students, she thinks I am too close to them and our courses retention rates and intake for next year, then lead me onto talking about other staff members and that just made me feel like I was belittling them. Had a hypo at 3:30 (no money resulted in no food or drink all day) then broke down on the way home. ARGHHH what a day...

Little rant over.

I suppose on one level the hypo is a good thing as I have clearly got my levels down (4.4 reading, I know its not low low, but I think because my body is used to being much higher it hit me hard and fast at that level.) Funnily enough a student came to my rescue and knew what was wrong, without me saying a word to them, they gave me their cupcake then ran to a vending machine and brought me back some lucozade, bless em.

Just working on calming the hell down as I am currently on the verge of quitting my job.


----------



## SB2015

Paul
That is what you might call a Happy Hypo.  As you have recognised you were nowhere near these levels before you started on this new regime so well done.  Great that your students were able to help (and says a lot about their regard for you that they did that)

Now that your levels are more normal you will get some hypos so it will be good to have your hypo treatment everywhere.  At work in rooms you teach in, in your bag, in the car, ... hypos pop up sometimes because we have got something wrong and also for absolutely no reason that we can fathom.  So you just need to be posted.  Off to replace the juice by the bed which I had to use for a hypo last night.  My own fault I had had some wine and forgotten to reduce my basal insulin overnight.


----------



## zx10pilot

Hi Paul,
Just noticed you havn't updated us with your progress for a little while.
I hope you're job situation has now improved, and your levels are still pretty stable?
regards
zx


----------



## SB2015

How are you diong Paul?

It would be good to catch up on your news.


----------



## 1st Paradox

SB2015 said:


> How are you diong Paul?
> 
> It would be good to catch up on your news.



Sorry, been a little busy of late...

All is going very well tbh, my levels are hovering around 11 - 15. with only 1 hyper (21.3) in the last week and a lowest reading of 8.8. I am sleeping through the night, have more energy during the day and am generally feeling good.

Thanks for your enquiry, nice to know Im thought about


----------



## Steff

Lovely to hear from you Paul and things getting better bit by bit is good. How's things at college


----------



## 1st Paradox

Thanks Steff,

Work... well, as things have been going downhill for the past few years with new management and massive alterations (for the worse), redundancies and funding restrictions all leading up to Fridays incident I have basically decided to push my private client work further with hope to grow a viable business, ultimately focussing on a new career path. I am feeling very good about this, the only thing bothering me is my giving up on the students. But I may yet be a visiting lecturer so I can still keep some of that contact.


----------



## SB2015

When I left teaching I thought I would really miss the contact with students, and had always enjoyed bumping into them in town and catching up with Ines that had left.  I still see a few of my old (and some are now very old) students (off to the wedding of two of them next month and they are in their 30s).  
However the loss of all the red tape, the VERY regular changes in the curriculum and the negative news and battering by the governments alongside very enjoyable other work swung the balance for me.

Enjoy what you do.  This life is not a rehearsal


----------



## 1st Paradox

SB2015 said:


> When I left teaching I thought I would really miss the contact with students, and had always enjoyed bumping into them in town and catching up with Ines that had left.  I still see a few of my old (and some are now very old) students (off to the wedding of two of them next month and they are in their 30s).
> However the loss of all the red tape, the VERY regular changes in the curriculum and the negative news and battering by the governments alongside very enjoyable other work swung the balance for me.
> 
> Enjoy what you do.  This life is not a rehearsal



it's always good to hear that life carries on, and although we all know it does, it is hard to make such a massive change for anyone. However, like you implied, I got one shot at this life and I should do all I can to make it the best I can. I will still have contact with students from time to time and am sure that it could be a potential source of employees in the future.


----------



## Bubbsie

Steff said:


> Hi.
> Just wanted to say being one of the first who spent alot of time posting with Paul back and forth on the start of this thread that he has came along way dealing with everything he first told us. I think jumping in with your feet comments etc is a tad harsh.  Did you read the entire thread


Steff...well said & very diplomatic in the circumstances... I have read this thread from the start...I never give advice on type 1's...know so little about it...would not be appropriate...as diabetics we are all facing a similar battle...whilst type 1's & 2's are faced with differing challenges in respect of our various conditions/ medications (side effects and so on) ....members come here for support & encouragement...it's one of the major things we as diabetics have in common...negativity does not help...unless fully informed of all the relevant facts...with the necessary qualifications to give advice on the loss of limbs/digits...then don't...again...well said!


----------



## Bubbsie

1st Paradox said:


> it's always good to hear that life carries on, and although we all know it does, it is hard to make such a massive change for anyone. However, like you implied, I got one shot at this life and I should do all I can to make it the best I can. I will still have contact with students from time to time and am sure that it could be a potential source of employees in the future.


I'm self employed 1stP...have been for a very long time...it can be precarious...however...now... wouldn't have it any other way...if work is so contentious...makes you miserable...despite the loyalty/relationship you've built up with your students...might be worth you giving it serious consideration...never one for clichés...but...like said...one shot...up to you!


----------



## 1st Paradox

Ok so I am decided... I will hand in my notice at work and head in a new direction... Self employment working mostly from home to start, should make it a lot easier for me to manage my Diabetes, eating habits and family life with less stress overall. Gonna miss my job but if you don't take risk, you don't get the rewards eh?.

Thanks for the kind words of encouragement all, I really am so glad I found this forum, it has truly helped change my life for the better, thanks to all of you!


----------



## Steff

While it's sad to know your handing in your notice from what you have told us all its for the better in my opinion Paul very very stressful indeed. I hope it opens new doors and opportunities for you m8 x


----------



## grovesy

Hope it works out for you.


----------



## stephknits

You really have come a long way in a short period of time!  Hopefully all the changes you are making, both to your diabetes management and to your life in general will be hugely beneficial.  Good on you


----------



## Bill Stewart

Paul
Having just read all through your thread, i am glad like the others to see you have started to get to grips with the insulin and food stuff, we all have to deal with.
I am , like you a "workaholic" I get up at 6am and work until 4am most days. I am 56 and have done this most of my adult life. The problem of diabetes is that you must punctuate your days with food and insulin, it does not matter which way you  do it. Eat first then stab or stab and jag, as long as you supply the body with enough to absorb the free sugars floating around in your blood stream. The DAFNE course will help you greatly, but be aware that when you do end up in hospital you will probably meet DIABETIC SUFFERING nurses who are less aware of such systems than you will be. I am often asked what would you take for lunch as if lunch always contains the same amount of carbohydrate everytime. Insulin opens your cells enough to get the sugars in and the more you want to do the more sugar needs to be absorbed. You cannot follow some strict diet or medication regeme because each day ,each meal and each activity requires different treament. Fortunatly you will know what you need (in time). Dafne needs you to look at what sugars you have floating aboat unabsorbed in your blood before your meal and to add a correction to you insulin to account for that old sugar, so you will dose a little more for any excess and then consider the meal you are about to consume. All of the doses we take are based on our own unique phsyiologies and are expressed as ratios. for me I take 1unit for every 7.5g of carbohydrate and 1unit for every 1.5mml/l of sugar in my blood. I am a little lax and like to run at around 10 or 11 as I am working these crazy hours like yourself, so I target each reading to get to 10 except when I have a sick day and then I push for an 8. BTW when sick ( keatones present) I push 5 units every 2 hours until my sugars return to a normal range and the keatones fall below 0.6.

I must say you have been very lucky to get this far and to find this welcoming and helpful forum.

I got here by having a DKA (Which I would not recomend) way too much drips/titrations and pain!

Now that you are getting sorted, you could try what I have done with friends and family and also classes when in schools and educate them to enable them to get a diabetic up and running or fetching assistance which ever is best given the circumstance.

My 3 year old granddaughter Chiara - when she visits - wakes her grandfather at 6am and feeds him his painkillers (every so often 1 might be a little salty, but she's only 3), she them "stabs pop" and take a bloood reading and disposses of the strip in the sharps bin. Now for the good bit - she gets out the safety needles and sets up my pen for the pre porridge dose and presents it, clears the needle with 2 units and then checks that it reads 8 before thrusting it into my arm (less painful if she gets anything wrong- and she never has) depresses the button counts to 6 and then disassembles pen placinig needle in sharps bin and the pen in the box - and then drags pop down stairs to share in a big bowl of porridge. Her older sister is a little less forward and not so good with the pen, but wants to try. Everyone knows what to do (and they have to - god forbid i should ever need them to help - but I know they can) I carry as you should something overly sweet and fast acting for the hypos that we will surely have (fun sized bags of haribo and hypo-stop/glucogell). "pops medicine" is a talking point and a nice treat which even in the most confused state I will happy take and they are always there at the end of the day to say thank you to my private nurses.

Everyone should know what to do with a diabetic


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## Northerner

Bill Stewart said:


> My 3 year old granddaughter Chiara - when she visits - wakes her grandfather at 6am and feeds him his painkillers (every so often 1 might be a little salty, but she's only 3), she them "stabs pop" and take a bloood reading and disposses of the strip in the sharps bin. Now for the good bit - she gets out the safety needles and sets up my pen for the pre porridge dose and presents it, clears the needle with 2 units and then checks that it reads 8 before thrusting it into my arm (less painful if she gets anything wrong- and she never has) depresses the button counts to 6 and then disassembles pen placinig needle in sharps bin and the pen in the box - and then drags pop down stairs to share in a big bowl of porridge.


Not sure I'd encourage a 3 year old to use an insulin pen, @Bill Stewart - needles can be very dangerous and insulin even more so should she ever decide to 'play' with it without supervision   Let them watch an adult, maybe, but not set up and use the pen themselves.


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## Bill Stewart

She uses a safety needle and has a toy set made from spend pen shells - she is quite aware of what is involved and understands that these are for use with and only with her POP. She is understanding, but upset if I do not have any safety needles, but can explain why its so important to use them... Its all quite different from her mother frightening her with the "stabby" lancet of her kit, I prefer understanding rather than fear!
The children do not setup the pen without adult supervision and the pens live in sealed boxes out of reach, when she wants to play she uses her toy doctor set, which now includes helping diabetics and not just gouging out eyes and popping eardrums with dodgy toy parts - I am not unaware of the dangers of letting children loose in the real world, but I am always striving to build their skills in whatever area they want to go... I TAKE IT YOU WONT WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THE 7 YEAR OLD THAT CAN CHANGE ELECTRICAL PLUGS AND QUOTE THE 17TH REGULATIONS. They all start cooking at 6 and grown into well rounded, capable individuals, we were all keeping our ears and eyes open while they developed. This year my oldest grandchild will be 21 and qualifying from vettinary technicians degree with her sister close behind - so I have been at this child training lark for some time. Nice of you to care enough to comment. You can see why I asked you to check up on my post. TAH.


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## 1st Paradox

Bill Stewart said:


> Paul
> Having just read all through your thread, i am glad like the others to see you have started to get to grips with the insulin and food stuff, we all have to deal with.
> I am , like you a "workaholic" I get up at 6am and work until 4am most days. I am 56 and have done this most of my adult life. The problem of diabetes is that you must punctuate your days with food and insulin, it does not matter which way you  do it. Eat first then stab or stab and jag, as long as you supply the body with enough to absorb the free sugars floating around in your blood stream. The DAFNE course will help you greatly, but be aware that when you do end up in hospital you will probably meet DIABETIC SUFFERING nurses who are less aware of such systems than you will be. I am often asked what would you take for lunch as if lunch always contains the same amount of carbohydrate everytime. Insulin opens your cells enough to get the sugars in and the more you want to do the more sugar needs to be absorbed. You cannot follow some strict diet or medication regeme because each day ,each meal and each activity requires different treament. Fortunatly you will know what you need (in time). Dafne needs you to look at what sugars you have floating aboat unabsorbed in your blood before your meal and to add a correction to you insulin to account for that old sugar, so you will dose a little more for any excess and then consider the meal you are about to consume. All of the doses we take are based on our own unique phsyiologies and are expressed as ratios. for me I take 1unit for every 7.5g of carbohydrate and 1unit for every 1.5mml/l of sugar in my blood. I am a little lax and like to run at around 10 or 11 as I am working these crazy hours like yourself, so I target each reading to get to 10 except when I have a sick day and then I push for an 8. BTW when sick ( keatones present) I push 5 units every 2 hours until my sugars return to a normal range and the keatones fall below 0.6.
> 
> I must say you have been very lucky to get this far and to find this welcoming and helpful forum.
> 
> I got here by having a DKA (Which I would not recomend) way too much drips/titrations and pain!
> 
> Now that you are getting sorted, you could try what I have done with friends and family and also classes when in schools and educate them to enable them to get a diabetic up and running or fetching assistance which ever is best given the circumstance.
> 
> My 3 year old granddaughter Chiara - when she visits - wakes her grandfather at 6am and feeds him his painkillers (every so often 1 might be a little salty, but she's only 3), she them "stabs pop" and take a bloood reading and disposses of the strip in the sharps bin. Now for the good bit - she gets out the safety needles and sets up my pen for the pre porridge dose and presents it, clears the needle with 2 units and then checks that it reads 8 before thrusting it into my arm (less painful if she gets anything wrong- and she never has) depresses the button counts to 6 and then disassembles pen placinig needle in sharps bin and the pen in the box - and then drags pop down stairs to share in a big bowl of porridge. Her older sister is a little less forward and not so good with the pen, but wants to try. Everyone knows what to do (and they have to - god forbid i should ever need them to help - but I know they can) I carry as you should something overly sweet and fast acting for the hypos that we will surely have (fun sized bags of haribo and hypo-stop/glucogell). "pops medicine" is a talking point and a nice treat which even in the most confused state I will happy take and they are always there at the end of the day to say thank you to my private nurses.
> 
> Everyone should know what to do with a diabetic


Thanks for the kind words and the inspirational ones as well, I wouldn't dare allow my 4yo my epipen (he would probably lose an eye with his excitable nature lol) but it is great to hear that this additional support helps you and I am sure will also help me to also get those close to me in volved more in my care.

I have now officially handed in my notice at work so time to focus more on me for a change.


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## Lucy Honeychurch

1st Paradox said:


> Thanks for the kind words and the inspirational ones as well, I wouldn't dare allow my 4yo my epipen (he would probably lose an eye with his excitable nature lol) but it is great to hear that this additional support helps you and I am sure will also help me to also get those close to me in volved more in my care.
> 
> I have now officially handed in my notice at work so time to focus more on me for a change.




Good luck!


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## SB2015

1st Paradox said:


> Thanks for the kind words and the inspirational ones as well, I wouldn't dare allow my 4yo my epipen (he would probably lose an eye with his excitable nature lol) but it is great to hear that this additional support helps you and I am sure will also help me to also get those close to me in volved more in my care.
> 
> I have now officially handed in my notice at work so time to focus more on me for a change.


A new start.  Keep us up the date with progress.


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## Steff

Hi Paul how are things not heard much from you lately x


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## SB2015

How are things giong Paul.
I look forward to an update when you have time.


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## HOBIE

Welcome Paul.


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## Wirrallass

We're not hearing from you Paul  - how are you doing  - do you need any help or advice  - or support even? Then do please message us, we can give you all three. Take care now
Wirralass


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## 1st Paradox

Hi all,

Sorry for the mysterious elusiveness, just really busy as I am sure you can all imagine.

All is going well, I have managed to keep my levels at around 8-12 mmol , am sleeping most nights and overall am feeling a lot more stress free, confident and overall happier. Been working on a business brand identity, and making some stuffs ready for making all the income (I made a small deal with my partner that if I am not earning at least the monthly rent by next september, I have to go find work  fair deal I think).

I hope all of you are well also.


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## Wirrallass

1st Paradox said:


> Hi all,
> 
> Sorry for the mysterious elusiveness, just really busy as I am sure you can all imagine.
> 
> All is going well, I have managed to keep my levels at around 8-12 mmol , am sleeping most nights and overall am feeling a lot more stress free, confident and overall happier. Been working on a business brand identity, and making some stuffs ready for making all the income (I made a small deal with my partner that if I am not earning at least the monthly rent by next september, I have to go find work  fair deal I think).
> 
> I hope all of you are well also.


Hi 1st Paradox  - thanks for messaging  - so lovely to hear from you  - also glad to hear that all is well on the western front and you're managing your diabetes with good bgls. Well done you  Good luck with your business venture - take care and please stay in touch from time to time to let us know how you're faring.?
WL


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## grovesy

Glad you are more stable and feeling more relaxed.


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## SB2015

Well done Paul.  Good to hear your news of such big steps forward.


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## Steff

Glad to have heard from you Paul x


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## stephknits

Great to hear all progressing well.  Have you taken a look back at your first posts?  I recommend it!  What a change!


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## Steff

@1st Paradox  Hi Paul been about a month since you posted how are things going for you these days?


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## Bill Stewardson

Hello to Paul


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