# Red Nose Challenge poem!



## Northerner (Mar 4, 2009)

Hi, this is the poem I have written using the words and phrases submitted to my poetry challenge thread, highlighted in red - if you like it, please consider making a donation to Red Nose day on March 13th!

Keep taking the pills, the good doctor said,
That’s easy for him, lying snug in his bed!
His brain isn’t bursting with all of those names
Of drugs and concoctions that all look the same!
Candesarten and ramipril – too many to mention,
That all promise cures for my bad hypertension,
Or statins and aspirin that both do their bit
To keep all my organs and arteries fit.

And now, whilst I’m at it, and I’ve got your ear,
Let’s just take a look at this medical gear!
There’s needles and meters, please just take your pick!
You even expect me to wee on a stick!
Believe me, sometimes, it’s a pain to inject,
When you’re worrying about bits you just might infect!
And who on Earth’s Dafne – is she a diabetic nurse?
And please, am I normal? Or quite the reverse?

What’s ketoacidosis? The word should be banned!
You shouldn’t use language I don’t understand!
That consultant I saw said there’d be no more sweets!
Does he think life’s worth living without any treats?
Gimme, gimme gimme! I want sugar now!
Can I have a pudding? Let’s not have a row!
Get counting the carbs, just hand me the scales!
I’ve worked out my ratio and it never fails!

And down at the clinic they’re so proud of me – 
‘Cos I’ve got a near normal HbA1c!
When I have a hypo, I just need a snack,
It’s highly unlikely I’ll fall flat on my back!
Some people get frightened, as though I have rabies,
But I find I can treat it with five jelly babies!
So if you ever see me at the walk in centre
Looking wild and crazy like a mad inventor,
It’s because I’ve been given all this new stuff to learn.
And some times I don’t know which way I should turn.

And there are also times when I feel like a fool,
That I don’t understand and should go back to school,
I mean ’38 on diagnosis – is that bad or OK?
I was quite lost for words, didn’t know what to say…
But I’ve kept my appointments, now I know a lot more
I’ve even found out what a calculator’s for!
And which foods are slow release, and which of them fast,
And how long my fast-acting insulin should last!

If someone asks ‘Have you got your insulin bag?’
Then I’ll smile and I’ll nod, and won’t find it a drag.
Tablets and injections, if this is my fate,
I’m an all-conquering hero like Alex the Great!
Now, I know it’s immodest, and sounds like a boast,
But being diabetic makes me sweeter than most!


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## Caroline (Mar 4, 2009)

Brilliant Northener, I shall put some money in my Diabtes UK box and send it off at the end of the week.


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## katie (Mar 4, 2009)

hahaha, that's so good Northerner - I love how you fitted them all in


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## elizajayne (Mar 4, 2009)

Excellent - you've summed up our lives, and in poetry too.
Worth printing in the Diabetic mag for all to see.

Have my various red noses, and badges, and whoopy cushion too, but will put coins in pot.

Keep smiling.
elizajayne


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## bev (Mar 4, 2009)

Blimey Northerner!

Thats flippin brilliant! BUT you used 24 of my phrases - i better get a mortgage to donate! EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alex has just come home from school and read it , here is what he thinks!:

i thought it was brilliant it was really good considering you had to use all of the words. Thanks for using my mums words and i will make sure she gives me lots of money to give in to school for red nose day. alex



Bev


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## Northerner (Mar 4, 2009)

bev said:


> Blimey Northerner!
> 
> Thats flippin brilliant! BUT you used 24 of my phrases - i better get a mortgage to donate! EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> ...



Ha ha! Well, if you think about it bev, you wrote nearly half of it!

Thanks Alex, I wasn't sure what I'd let myself in for, and then when I saw your mum's list I was even more worried! But, it was fun doing it!


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## Corrine (Mar 4, 2009)

Northerner - fantasic - as usual.  I shall go to the bank and get my donation straight after work.


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## Ikklemo (Mar 4, 2009)

Northerner that is excellent, and well worth a donation.  Will have to get to to the bank this week.


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## sofaraway (Mar 5, 2009)

That's fantastic! I will be donating now in support.


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## Vanessa (Mar 5, 2009)

Northerner, I am so impressed - yet again - by your skill.  I have two main charities that I support so I'll make a donation to both


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## Barb (Nov 22, 2010)

Brilliant, as usual. Great stuff.



Northerner said:


> Hi, this is the poem I have written using the words and phrases submitted to my poetry challenge thread, highlighted in red - if you like it, please consider making a donation to Red Nose day on March 13th!
> 
> Keep taking the pills, the good doctor said,
> That?s easy for him, lying snug in his bed!
> ...


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## Steff (Nov 22, 2010)

I missed this originally shock horror lol

Nice work Northey you never seize to amaze me ha


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## robofski (Mar 14, 2013)

That's really very good Alan, very creative.  I shall be sure to find a red nose bucket to donate!


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## megga (Mar 15, 2013)

It is very good,


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## bennyg70 (Mar 15, 2013)

Wow - Very good, can relate to every bit of that! Im not a poetry person, but its mad m want to read more of your stuff. I donated a pound this morning. Ill donate another in your honour.

Wheres the original thread?


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## Northerner (Mar 15, 2013)

bennyg70 said:


> Wow - Very good, can relate to every bit of that! Im not a poetry person, but its mad m want to read more of your stuff. I donated a pound this morning. Ill donate another in your honour.
> 
> Wheres the original thread?



Here it is:

http://www.diabetessupport.co.uk/boards/showthread.php?t=1005

I also did another for the 2011 Comic Relief, although I didn't think it was very good (post number 11 in the thread):

http://www.diabetessupport.co.uk/boards/showthread.php?t=16006


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