# Cracker joke of the day!



## Northerner (Dec 25, 2016)

I got one of those new Bonnie Tyler sat-navs but I had to return it. It kept telling me to turn around and every now and then it falls apart.


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## ukjohn (Dec 25, 2016)

Northerner said:


> I got one of those new Bonnie Tyler sat-navs but I had to return it. It kept telling me to turn around and every now and then it falls apart.



HaHaHa... I like that one.


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## robert@fm (Dec 25, 2016)

If I had a Kenneth McKellar satnav, presumably it would tell me to keep right on to the end of the road, and then keep right on round the bend.


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## Ditto (Dec 25, 2016)

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!


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## mikeyB (Dec 26, 2016)

What do you  call the Brummie psychologist who fell in the deep  fat fryer?

Freud


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## Ditto (Dec 26, 2016)

LOL


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## HOBIE (Dec 26, 2016)

Northerner said:


> I got one of those new Bonnie Tyler sat-navs but I had to return it. It kept telling me to turn around and every now and then it falls apart.


The daft - ones are the best


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## TheClockworkDodo (Dec 31, 2016)

What do you get if you cross a snowman and a shark?

Frostbite!


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## Bloden (Jan 4, 2017)

What d'you get if you crawl under a cow?
A pat on the head.


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## Wirrallass (May 20, 2017)

I have ten legs - twenty arms and fifty-four feet. What am I?
_A liar!_


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## Wirrallass (May 20, 2017)

Doctor Doctor,  I have a pain in my eye every time I drink hot chocolate.
_Take the spoon out of your mug before you drink it!_


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## Wirrallass (May 20, 2017)

What vegetable goes well with jacket potatoes?
_Button mushrooms._


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## Wirrallass (May 20, 2017)

I bought this computer yesterday and I found a twig in the disk drive!
_"I'm sorry Sir, you'll have to speak with the Branch Manager."_


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## TheClockworkDodo (May 20, 2017)

Oh dear, @wirralass, where did you find all of these?!


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## Wirrallass (May 20, 2017)

Haha! Was just having a stupid funny half hour or so with a friend & was coaxed!! Blame it on the glass of white which is a rarity for me  - all of 'em pathetic I know but noticed you did like one of them x
WL


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## TheClockworkDodo (May 21, 2017)




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