# Psychologist help - what to expect?



## Asherly (Feb 14, 2021)

Long time since I’ve been on here please be nice I left once already.
I can’t cope with my 3 yo begging me not to hurt him again. I can’t stop crying. Just music from
Pre diagnosis sets me off again. Had a Tslim X2 since Dec now and so the novelty of no more injections has worn off. I literally have to use my arms legs everything I can to pin Jamie down to get a canular on him. I called my team and helpful Emma answered and could empathise as she has a 3 yo but his Dad has to take for preschool jabs as she can’t cope seeing him in pain. I hung up on her. I have now asked for help for Jamie and for me but I am wondering what to expect? Is there a magic plaster or words or is this guy going to tell me it will be easier when he is bigger? What will Jamie actually understand or will they give me tools to help manage him and myself emptionally? Did anyone find it helpful for their 3 y olds or littler children? No one can help we are locked in and not one person has been able to grasp how to manage Jamie so I am his literal only carer apart from when he is at nursey, that is closed due to COVID outbreak.


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## Docb (Feb 14, 2021)

Welcome back @Asherly, you really seem to be in a difficult place.  

I have no experience that might help but I will tag two of our experienced parents @Bronco Billy or @Thebearcametoo who might have some thoughts.


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## Thebearcametoo (Feb 14, 2021)

Oh bless you it’s so hard.

My daughter is older but we’ve still had our issues. The pump has been less of an issue than the dexcom but we’ve had problems with both.

One thing that’s helped is my oldest niece (early 30s) did a lot of facetime cheering on. She suggested to my daughter than it should take less time to do a set change than going to the loo and we go back to that when she’s resistant and dragging things out.
Even in lockdown there should be options for play therapy for him and for your team to support him. It’s not unusual for kids to struggle once the novelty wears off. Ask directly for some play therapy. And ask for the team psychologist to make space for you so you can talk over how tough you’re finding it.


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## Asherly (Feb 14, 2021)

Docb said:


> Welcome back @Asherly, you really seem to be in a difficult place.
> 
> I have no experience that might help but I will tag two of our experienced parents @Bronco Billy or @Thebearcametoo who might have some





Thebearcametoo said:


> Oh bless you it’s so hard.
> 
> My daughter is older but we’ve still had our issues. The pump has been less of an issue than the dexcom but we’ve had problems with both.
> 
> ...


Hey . Yes I have directly asked for help. For both of us. When I did this I was asked if I thought Jamie would participate in a zoom meeting. I actually laughed out loud down the phone. So the teams psychologist person will be in touch next week hence the wondering what to expect.


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## Thebearcametoo (Feb 14, 2021)

We had face time face appointments with the psychologist but that was pre pandemic. You could do phone or zoom for you. Our clinics are in person there could be an argument for in person work with him. It will depend on your team though. I think supporting you is as important as making it easier to do his management though so don’t underestimate the value of doing what’s offered for you.


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## stephknits (Feb 14, 2021)

My daughter is totally at the other end age wise, but she does access the psychologist in person .  We were offered phone conversation s but we said it would be difficult for my daughter to communicate that way, at least until she got to know them.  The psychologist was happy to see her in person. 
I have also been by myself to see the psychologist and found it very useful to talk through my own feelings separate to the needs of my daughter.


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## Ditto (Feb 14, 2021)

Welcome back @Asherly


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## Bronco Billy (Feb 14, 2021)

When my daughter saw our psychologist, she was old enough to do so on her own so the process might be different for smaller children. However, I understand (I didn’t ask her too many questions out of respect for her privacy) that they discussed what was behind the issues she had and she was given ‘coping strategies’ to use in the difficult moments.


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## Asherly (Feb 15, 2021)

Thank you for your replies.


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## Asherly (Feb 17, 2021)

Bronco Billy said:


> When my daughter saw our psychologist, she was old enough to do so on her own so the process might be different for smaller children. However, I understand (I didn’t ask her too many questions out of respect for her privacy) that they discussed what was behind the issues she had and she was given ‘coping strategies’ to use in the difficult moments.


It’s interesting reading your underneath statement now I’m on a leveller level. Thats how I feel - he is throwing his worst at me at the minute, I need to stand stronger.


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## Cherrelle DUK (Feb 17, 2021)

Hi Asherly, so sorry to hear about what you're dealing with at the mo.

It does get easier as they get older and understand more but understandably, you need support with the here and now.

I can't speak to what the you're seeing Psychologist will do but they will typically be interested in learning more about what's going on, assessing the situation and offering some support with managing things. 

It might be worth noting some questions and concerns down on a bit of paper and taking that with you so you can get your questions answered. Hopefully they'll be able to give you some strategies and support to make things a bit easier.


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