# 2nd Baby was it easier



## PhoebeC (Jul 20, 2012)

My husband wants to get a motorbike, I've told him I don't want him to get one as I don't think they are safe and if he does I have said then I want a 2nd baby.

This might seem extreme but I would love more children the only reason I had to not do it was the risk to me, I had a horrid time last time and didn't feel I could risk it all again.

We didn't plan and I was lucky to have such a good hb1ac but it could have been better. 

However I know we have mums out there with more than one child. And if I planned it then the risks would be lower.

If he is getting a scouter then I want another baby.

So please can you tell me honestly how the first and second/third pregnancy's where.

Thanks,

Phoebe


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## Medusa (Jul 20, 2012)

i personally found it easier second time around because nothing is so new to experience.... as for motorbikes they aint dangerous only as much as the person who rides them or the other folk on the road but a pedestrian or car driver can fall foul of an accident too .....


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## newbs (Jul 21, 2012)

My second pregnancy was harder than my first but due to low bp rather than my diabetes, I found the diabetes side of things easier as I knew what I was doing and what to expect.  The birth was traumatic and ended in an emergency c-section with me under general anaesthetic whereas my first was a quick, natural birth.  I feel this was due to induction though as I went into labour naturally with DD1.  I think that all labours/births are different and there is no way of knowing what will happen but would think that the second time round would have to be easier for you than the first.  Definitely planning the pregnancy will make a difference.  Having 2 children and watching them together is priceless and well worth the effort/pain - but obviously that's my personal opinion and not for everyone.  If you do decide to go for it I wish you all the best.


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## Monkey (Jul 23, 2012)

I think if you didn't have help in the planning stages last time, and were able to get into a pre-conception clinic 2nd time, they'd be a noticeable difference.

From experience, I had no pre-conc care first time. Wasn't mentioned or offered by anyone. This time, I was under them for a few months before getting the go ahead and a few more months before getting pregnant, and the difference in very early care was incredible - I was seen days after my positive test, have been scanned at 7 and 10 weeks and will be again at 13, the support has been fab.

Also, it's worth knowing that you can discuss the things from your first pregnancy that were particularly tough going, maybe not with the diabetes team but often with a mw in a debrief type thing. Might be worth asking, if you've not already.

I've got a friend who had a very early first baby (about 25w) and went thro a really rigorous planning process for her 2nd. She felt really confident that they'd thought of everything that might help her.

In diabetes and pregnancy terms, I'm probably finding it slightly harder this time. Partly because I'm more tired, having an almost 3 year old around, and partly because I know so much more than first time, if that makes sense? 

I can't go much past there yet, but I'll let you know next year how the rest of it has been!


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## Lizzzie (Jul 26, 2012)

Hi Phoebe

I remember your traumas, you did have a horrid time :0( but you coped a lot better than you think you did; you're very strong. 

I can't comment of whether the second one's any easier, but you'd get through and you'd be glad that you did it...

...and scooters dont really come into it (much).


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## mmackay20040 (Jul 26, 2012)

Hi Phoebe, 

I too remember your story from first time round.  
I had Seumas May 2011 and I'm currently 20 weeks with No2.  So far, it's been much the same for me up until now, BM's doing the usual fluctuations etc but I feel like I'm dealing with the diabetes better and I'm practised from last time (does that make sense?).  Last time I was stressing about the diabetes but this time I know I can do it as I've done it before.  One thing I will say is the tiredness is harder this time.  Obviously first time, come the evening, I could just lie on the couch! This time, there's no time for taking it easy!!  
Whatever you decide, I hope all goes well and if you want to ask anything, ask away.  

Marie xx


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## beckyp (Jul 31, 2012)

Hi Phoebe

I remember your first pregnancy well as we were both pregnant at the same time with our firsts!  I'm now 25 weeks pregnant and I'm finding it much easier.  

With E I was very lucky in that I didn't suffer ms but I did experience ridiculous amounts of hypos and PET at 38 weeks.  I found the whole pregnancy stressful because it was all so new and a massive learning experience in relation to diabetes and control. 

This time round I've found that I HAVE to be more relaxed and thankfully it's something that the hospital agree with me about.  The last thing E needs is a full-time Mummy having hypos all the time.  My targets in NZ are slightly different to the UK and I have to hit the same target 2 hours after meals instead of 1 hour - this has reduced the number of hypos I have massively and strangely my hba1c is better than it ever was with 1st pregnancy. 

I would agree with mmackay20040 in that the tiredness is harder this time.  E is at an age where she is refusing day time naps and teething has her waking at night again (she's been sleeping through since she was 7 or 8 months so it's come as quite a shock to all of us!).  In the first tri I was falling asleep on the sofa in the evenings at half 8!


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## PhoebeC (Aug 2, 2012)

beckyp said:


> Hi Phoebe
> 
> I remember your first pregnancy well as we were both pregnant at the same time with our firsts!  I'm now 25 weeks pregnant and I'm finding it much easier.
> 
> ...



Thanks for all those who said i did well first time, i did not enjoy it at all and the birth was hell. She was so worth it. But if it was that again, i just couldnt do it.

That's the biggest thing stopping me, Jemima, I don't want her to miss out on me. Plus i work full time so the time i have with her is small enough without spending it all in bed.

But then i think about me and my brother and how much i love him, how much fun we had a kids and now how we support each other and i cant imagine her not having that. She has friends but its not the same.
She is so jealous of other people, i think she needs a sibling.

Need to spend some serous time thinking on this, before i can even start on talking the husband round


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