# Dark Demons



## gail1 (Mar 13, 2017)

having to fight my mental health demons again. weekend was very bad came close to doing something stupid. am taking it one small step at a time. will be happier when my new care co gets in touch. im really struggerling with sucidal thoughts they hauth me im tired would see gp but all they will do is refer me to my care co Im hearing voices telling me ro do nasty thingsThe Mind phone helpline have been brillant but they are only open 4-12 and my darkest hours are around 2-3am.  im crying as i type this and i dont know why


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## grovesy (Mar 13, 2017)

Sorry to hear you are struggling with your mental health issues. Hope your care co gets in touch soon, can you not call them?


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## Kaylz (Mar 13, 2017)

Sorry to hear you are struggling could you not give Samaritans a call I thought they were open round the clock x


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## Stitch147 (Mar 13, 2017)

Hi Gail, sorry to hear that you are struggling at the moment, hope you manage to get in touch with your care team and they can give yu the help that you need.


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## Lilian (Mar 13, 2017)

Gail, that is quite an awful plight to be in - many hugs.     May I make a suggestion.    When you are in a different mood, write down in large letters a list of all the reasons you have for living and wanting to live.   Keep it somewhere handy and prominent.    When these voices start to tell you things and there is nobody around to phone or speak to, read that list out, as loud as you like so as to drown out the voices that tell you otherwise.    Keep doing this until such time as you can get to speak to someone or you feel you have the better of those voices.    Keep adding to the list as and when you think of something.    If you are in one of those down moods you will probably not be able to think of many, but when you are not you will be able to add to the list.    I cannot understand there not being someone around at night, because night time is usually the time when they are needed the most.


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## Amigo (Mar 13, 2017)

Are you taking your medication Gail? I know sometimes the side effects make people go off them but they're so necessary to keep those dark demons quiet. Are you medical care team able to give you something to help you sleep because the nocturnal hours seem to be your worse times.

Sending huge best wishes to you. It must be a tormented and frightening feeling to imagine something else is controlling you. Mental health services are just not good enough I'm afraid


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## Bloden (Mar 14, 2017)

Oh, Gail, I really feel for you.  Sending big (((HUGS))). How are you doing today?


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## Lindarose (Mar 14, 2017)

Sending best wishes and hugs Gail. Hope you can make contact with your new care co soon. The suggestions made here sound worth a try. Let us know how you are getting on xx


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## Lucy Honeychurch (Mar 14, 2017)

All the best Gail, I hope you are getting some support xx


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## gail1 (Mar 16, 2017)

i have an appoinment with my new care co next wednesday. not on any meds apart from once a month depo as i overdosed on them and have been judg ed to be at hign risk of sucide by my pdoc so they stopped my meds. still struggerling but feeling a bit better, thankyou all for ypur support it means a lot to me


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## sean penguin (Mar 16, 2017)

good luck and best wishes


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## grovesy (Mar 16, 2017)

gail1 said:


> i have an appoinment with my new care co next wednesday. not on any meds apart from once a month depo as i overdosed on them and have been judg ed to be at hign risk of sucide by my pdoc so they stopped my meds. still struggerling but feeling a bit better, thankyou all for ypur support it means a lot to me


Glad you are feeling a bit better.


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## Manda1 (Mar 16, 2017)

I am glad that you are feeling a bit brighter love xx


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## Ralph-YK (Mar 16, 2017)

gail1 said:


> im crying as i type this and i dont know why


Plenty of people do that.  {*holds your hand*}


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## gail1 (Mar 20, 2017)

i ended up in hospital saturday as i took an overdose of paracetomol they kept me in till sunday night. i did try not to but it didt work out


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## grovesy (Mar 20, 2017)

Sorry to hear this. Have your care co. Been in touch yet?


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## Lucy Honeychurch (Mar 20, 2017)

gail1 said:


> i ended up in hospital saturday as i took an overdose of paracetomol they kept me in till sunday night. i did try not to but it didt work out



Oh no, I'm very sorry to hear you've been in such a bad place  I really hope you haven't been discharged with no support in place for you (((hugs))) x


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## sean penguin (Mar 20, 2017)

from a fellow mental health struggler here's hoping things take a turn for the better for you.


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## Wirrallass (Mar 22, 2017)

Kaylz said:


> Sorry to hear you are struggling could you not give Samaritans a call I thought they were open round the clock x


They are x


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## Wirrallass (Mar 22, 2017)

Hello gail1. I totally empathise with you and I'm sorry to hear you are struggling with your dark demons - it's certainly not a good place to be in. Be strong if you can and I hope you new care co will give you all the support you need - *and soon.*

As with all the other good advice you have been given from forum members above - I agree with @ Lilian contribution also - so write down your thoughts & feelings when you are in a lighter mood.

I have been in the place where you are at right now so i ask you to read my poem LOSING TOUCH WITH REALITY in the thread 'Off the subject' - I hope it will give you the mental strength - encouragement and hope that you so need at this minute - and though you may not believe it right now - with professional help & guidance you will emerge from the dark gloomy place you find yourself in now, however long it takes.

Take care of yourself gail1- and please don't forget to eat even if it is little & often to keep up your reserves.

You did the right thing by venting your feelings here, this is a very good start - we as a forum are here to lend our collective support as much and as often as you need it. Take care (((hugs )))

Dx Type 2 April 2016
Metformin withdrawn
Diet control and exercise only


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## gail1 (Mar 23, 2017)

thankyou the love and support i recieve from this place continues to amaze me and uplift me


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## Steff (Mar 24, 2017)

Gail,
Good morning dont forget we all have a great deal of time and good advice and support waiting for you on here, so dont ever forget that your a very loving individual.


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## gail1 (Mar 30, 2017)

im in crsis saw my gp yesterday she is getting the crisis team involed after i told her im hearing a voice telling me to hurt someone im scared and not feeling very safe


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## Bloden (Mar 30, 2017)

Glad to hear your GP is listening to you, Gail. (((HUGS)))


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## grovesy (Mar 30, 2017)

Oh no, sorry to hear this. Hoping they help you.


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## Wirrallass (Mar 30, 2017)

I'm sorry to hear you're still struggling Gail - but glad you consulted your GP when you did. I hope by the time you read forum members posts - the crisis team will have made contact with you. We understand your plight Gail and we hope they will help you through this particularly bleak & dark place that you find yourself in. Take care, love and ((((hugs))))

Dx Type 2 April 2016
Metformin withdrawn
Diet control and exercise only


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## Lucy Honeychurch (Mar 30, 2017)

(((Hugs))) Gail and as wirralass says I hope by the time you read this they would have made contact with you x


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## Lindarose (Mar 30, 2017)

Sending best wishes Gail that you soon feel much better xx


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## Wirrallass (Apr 2, 2017)

Hello Gail how are you today? Do hope you are feeling better now (((hugd)))


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## gail1 (Apr 3, 2017)

the crisis team came and saw me  sunday they are going to up my depot on thursday as it seems theres a partern to these voices in that my depot runs out a week to a week and a half early so hopefully that will work


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## grovesy (Apr 3, 2017)

H


gail1 said:


> the crisis team came and saw me  sunday they are going to up my depot on thursday as it seems theres a partern to these voices in that my depot runs out a week to a week and a half early so hopefully that will work


Hoing it works for you.


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## Wirrallass (Apr 3, 2017)

gail1 said:


> the crisis team came and saw me  sunday they are going to up my depot on thursday as it seems theres a partern to these voices in that my depot runs out a week to a week and a half early so hopefully that will work


Thank you for staying in touch Gail - we on here are concerned & appreciate what you are going through so we're glad to hear that your crisis team visited you on Sunday  - hoping things wil begin to look brighter for you very soon - don't forget you are not alone so don't feel afraid to message us if you find your situation is getting out of hand again  - but obviously you would need to contact your crisis team too. Stay positive - be strong - be kind to yourself and  take care. (((Hugs)))


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## gail1 (Apr 13, 2017)

been in hospital again dont know what to do anymore


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## Greyhound Gal (Apr 13, 2017)

So sorry you're not feeling too great @gail1. What did the team at the hospital say?


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## Lindarose (Apr 13, 2017)

Sorry to hear you're struggling Gail. Is anyone giving you support? You know we are all sending good wishes your way. Keep in touch when you can


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## Lucy Honeychurch (Apr 13, 2017)

Sorry to hear that (((hugs))) I hope you're getting support now you're out of hospital xx


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## Wirrallass (Apr 13, 2017)

gail1 said:


> been in hospital again dont know what to do anymore


Oh Gail I'm truly so sorry to hear this  - have you been in touch with your crisis team since coming out of hospital? If you havent then maybe you should give them a call - you can't handle this on your own hun - mustn't  - you need to have someone with you  - family? close friend? It would help if you could talk about what happened at the weekend  - would be a relief for you to get it off your chest  - what did the hospital say whilst you were in  - and were you given any advice upon your discharge from hospital  - please stay in touch and talk to us  - we have all the time in the world to listen, guide and help you.

Here are telephone email & text numbers you could contact when you're feeling down & need to speak with someone person to person :-

MindinfoLine, Mental health : Tel: 0300 123 3393
info@mind.org.uk
Text: 86463

And

Samaritans: 24 hour crisis Hotline: UK tel: (212) 673 3000
and tel: 08457 090090
Email support: jo@samaritans.org
Also tel: Tel: 116 123

Please don't hesitate to ring any of the above telephone : email or text numbers - they are there too, to help you.
Please stay in touch Gail and take care. x
WL


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## grovesy (Apr 13, 2017)

Sorry to hear you have been in hospital again.


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## AJLang (Apr 13, 2017)

I'm sorry to hear this Gail. Thinking about you x


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## gail1 (Apr 24, 2017)

have been in hospital 3 times in 3 and half weeks am now feeling better thoughts are there Mind helpline have been a godsend i will beat this thank yiu akk fir your support


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## Stitch147 (Apr 24, 2017)

Glad you are having better thoughts Gail. X


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## grovesy (Apr 24, 2017)

Glad you feel you are having better thoughts.


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## Lucy Honeychurch (Apr 24, 2017)

That's good to hear, wishing you all the best x


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## Lindarose (Apr 24, 2017)

What good news Gail. Glad things are looking better. Long may it last!


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## Wirrallass (Apr 24, 2017)

Hello Gail
How lovely to hear from you, thank you for messaging  - but I'm sorry to hear it was necessary for you to be hospitalised three times very recently - you have been having a rough time of it lately havent you and If you would like to talk about it here then feel free to do so - you know you have the support of everyone here.

I'm so pleased to hear you have been given support & help from the Mind helpline - and similarly that you had the forethought to ring them in your hour of need rather than sit on your own with your inner thoughts playing havoc in your head. I couldnt be more proud of you for taking the initiative to ring Mind to seek their help  - I think you have found true friends there which must be of great comfort to you.

Having said that Gail I have noticed that you appear to be in a much more positive frame of mind today - this is excellent - maybe talking to Mind has helped you more than you know and I would like to think that you will continue to contact Mind should you feel the need to speak to someone when you feel the need to do so.

Again lovely to hear from you Gail and I wish you a happy & worryfree week ahead  - take care and look after yourself won't you.   Wirralass x (((hugs)))


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## Wirrallass (Apr 25, 2017)

Hello Gail 
This is just a short message for now  - how are you today  - I hope you slept well last night and feel refreshed and in a safer place. What are your plans for this afternoon then - anything interesting - meeting friends or relatives - shopping  - going for a walk or staying in to enjoy reading a favourite book of yours maybe?

The sun is shining in my neck of the woods but very windy & cold tho there's lots of folk on here who say it's snowing in their area - I hope the weather is good where you are to enable you to go out away from your four walls.

I'm so pleased that you reached out to speak to the Mind helpline and I hope you're continuing to stay in touch with them  - this is one of the most positive things you have done for yourself of late so very well done hun.

Take care and look after yourself  - and don't forget to eat will you even if little and often. Sending lots of love and huge (((((hugs))))) to remind you that you are always being thought of. Message here any time Gail should you wish or need to get in touch.
Wirralass xxx


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## Wirrallass (Apr 26, 2017)

Hi Gail  - how are you today? 
Sending love and (((hugs)))
WL X


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## Wirrallass (Jun 29, 2017)

Hello Gail 
Just reading this thread again and wondering how you are since you last posted  - I hope that you are feeling a lot better these days and enjoying life once again. It would be lovely to hear from you again so do message us  - you are never far away from our thoughts  - i hope you are well, take care & look after yourself (((hugs))) xxx
WL


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