# Fear and anxiety



## Eve Lazarova (Apr 9, 2020)

Hello everyone, 
so I've had diabetes for the last 15 years, im 23 now, not considering pregnancy soon. However I keep on thinking about it as a friend of mine recently gave birth at the age of 25, I feel as though until then I'll have to get it done... It feels terrible, I've got a boyfriend but I don't think he will be the one I'll have kids with, so there pops up another question, I don't really have that much time If I'd like to get pregnant by the age of 25, I should meet the person and probably move to another country (I live in Bulgaria but I'd like to move to a place where they can offer the best healthcare for pregnant woman with diabetes, not that I'm not happy with my doc. here but pregnancy with diabetes is not a topic very well discussed here) and it's all so much to think and cope with. Last night I kept on thinking about this and it just scares me A LOT. From what I've read, I know I'll have to try and get the perfect control and all that, but it's the small things that keep me wondering, like how am I even going to put the insulin injection when I have the baby inside. I know it may sound stupid but I'm just really scared and wanted to know if there's anyone else feeling this way.


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## Inka (Apr 9, 2020)

Hi @Eve Lazarova and welcome  

Pregnancy with Type 1 takes more work and requires more monitoring, but it’s perfectly possible and nothing to be scared about. I’ve gone through diabetic pregnancies and have healthy children 

I don’t think you need to “get pregnancy done”. You don’t have to have a baby by 25. It’s best to wait until you’re properly ready. Lots of people have babies in their 30s and even 40s, including those with diabetes.

You don’t need to worry about doing injections in pregnancy. It’s fine  You do need to have strict control of your blood sugar and you do need to take a prescribed larger dose of folic acid before conception and during part of pregnancy. You might also be prescribed a tiny dose of aspirin.

Don’t worry! Look after yourself and don’t put pressure on yourself to get pregnant by a certain age. You’ll know when the time is right, and it’s nothing to be afraid of. XX


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## Eve Lazarova (Apr 9, 2020)

Thank you, dear. 
I guess that is what I needed, a reassurance that despite the difficulties evertyhing will be okay. I am feeling a bit better now, I spoke to my doctor and cried it all out. I'm thinking of meditating in the afternoon. 
I have these crazy thoughts from time to time that I have to do certain things by a certain age. And then I can only focus on the worst in life. You are right that a baby is not something that needs to be done and maybe when te right time and person come into my life, I will be much more relaxed and ready to go through it. 
Once again thank you. 
I will try to stay focused on everyday life. 

XX


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## Inka (Apr 9, 2020)

Everyone gets stressed sometimes or gets into a pattern of worrying or thinking the worst. Once you know you do that, at least you can be prepared and replace the fearful thoughts with more positive ones.

Meditation is great. I find it really helps calm the mind.


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## everydayupsanddowns (Apr 12, 2020)

Hope it goes well for you when the time is right @Eve Lazarova 

But try not to worry too much in the meantime. Things will all work out  when the time comes, and you can’t change them by worrying or getting all stressed about them now - you’ll just make the time you have now less enjoyable.


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## NotWorriedAtAll (Apr 12, 2020)

I had my son when I was 29 and most of the women in my family have had their children between the ages of 29 and 39 and that worked out fine for all of us.  My best friend had her daughter in her forties.  I think it is best if you can to have a child when you are happy and settled with a partner you respect and trust and who respects and trusts you.

Parenting is a demanding business and the better the circumstances you can manage the happier and better a parent you will be and whatever happens you owe it to yourself and the potential offspring to arrange things in a way that will mean you can do the best job you can as a parent and if that means with a good partner then wait for that but if you genuinely think you would be a better parent as a single parent with a good network of friends and family around you then that works too.  Just don't feel rushed into making a decision, let life happen and enjoy the adventure of finding out what is in store for you.


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## trophywench (Apr 12, 2020)

Insulin jabs don't even go into anywhere that matters in pregnancy, there's a sort of gap under the skin between it and the underlying fat - and it's the 'gap' that the pointy end of a standard 4mm insulin pen needle, goes into, so the insulin is then injected into the 'gap' and mixes with the fluid in it - if you've ever pricked a finger with a fine needle when sewing but it didn't bleed, only a bit of colourless fluid wept out - that's what is in that gap! - interstitial fluid.  When you are slender or fat or pregnant, you are still only covered in skin, always with the gap under it - hence everywhere you can inject now, you still can anyway, as long as you can still reach that bit of you!

My Mother was 38 when she had me, 34 when she had my big sister because the War intervened, and we both grew up OK because we had a very stable home life - and that's one of the most important things for children!


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## PhoebeC (Apr 26, 2020)

No rush to have babies, my grandma had her last child in her mid 40s and both of them are healthily and happy and she had no issues. No need to rush, wait for the right person x


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## Eve Lazarova (Apr 29, 2020)

аgreed : )  


everydayupsanddowns said:


> Hope it goes well for you when the time is right @Eve Lazarova
> 
> But try not to worry too much in the meantime. Things will all work out  when the time comes, and you can’t change them by worrying or getting all stressed about them now - you’ll just make the time you have now less enjoyable.


Thanks : )) 

You are right, I don't need to worry about it now. 
I am feeling better now. It's just that sometimes anxiety makes me worry about things that are far away in the future. 
I guess it happens to all of us. 
Thank you all for the support.



PhoebeC said:


> No rush to have babies, my grandma had her last child in her mid 40s and both of them are healthily and happy and she had no issues. No need to rush, wait for the right person x


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## Eve Lazarova (Apr 29, 2020)

trophywench said:


> Insulin jabs don't even go into anywhere that matters in pregnancy, there's a sort of gap under the skin between it and the underlying fat - and it's the 'gap' that the pointy end of a standard 4mm insulin pen needle, goes into, so the insulin is then injected into the 'gap' and mixes with the fluid in it - if you've ever pricked a finger with a fine needle when sewing but it didn't bleed, only a bit of colourless fluid wept out - that's what is in that gap! - interstitial fluid.  When you are slender or fat or pregnant, you are still only covered in skin, always with the gap under it - hence everywhere you can inject now, you still can anyway, as long as you can still reach that bit of you!
> 
> My Mother was 38 when she had me, 34 when she had my big sister because the War intervened, and we both grew up OK because we had a very stable home life - and that's one of the most important things for children!


Great, that is very useful information. 

Thanks a lot! ))


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## Eve Lazarova (Apr 29, 2020)

Inka said:


> Hi @Eve Lazarova and welcome
> 
> Pregnancy with Type 1 takes more work and requires more monitoring, but it’s perfectly possible and nothing to be scared about. I’ve gone through diabetic pregnancies and have healthy children
> 
> ...


Thank you, @Inka !

It's great that all of you are so supportive.


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## PhoebeC (Apr 30, 2020)

Honestly this site helped me so much when I was pregnant, I don’t know how I would have done it on my own!


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