# 'Big School'



## Lilac_Rainbow (Sep 5, 2010)

My Daughter starts comprehensive tomorrow, and like any normal parent I am nervous for her, but I feel doubly so because it's not just my daughter starting secondary school but it's my fairly newly diagnosed diabetic daughter starting secondary school. My facebook friends are all "she'll be fine", and I know she will be, well tomorrow at least, probably.......but most of my friends don't know about her diabetes so they simply cannot know why I am quite as terrified as I am.

I just wanted to vent really, to someone other than my partner quite how scared I am.


----------



## lucy123 (Sep 5, 2010)

Hi Rainbow.

I totally understand how you feel. My son had a similar issue when he went to secondary school - not diabetes but had to eat every 3 hours or would faint.

I am afraid I have to agree with your friends and say she will be fine. She probably has a close friend or friends who will also keep an eye on her - us girls tend to stick together.

Is your daughter worried at all - if not, then I can only say its all part of letting go bit by bit - if its any help my 24 yr old has just gone to live overseas and I am still trying to let go!!

You are just doing your excellent job of being mum, but please try to not get too stressed.

Big hug for you - it is hard to let them grow up!


----------



## Lilac_Rainbow (Sep 5, 2010)

Oh I forgot to say, she is going to a different school to all of her friends from Primary school, she has made the odd friend, including, thank goodness, a older boy she met in hospital when she was first diagnosed, who was also Diabetic, but she has none of that support network we have spent the last few months building up to be able to recognize her hypo's etc, I think this is another reason I am so very scared and also feeling a little bit guilty because I am not sending her off with them, even though this school was clearly the better option for her in many other ways.

But thanks Lucy, it is nice to be able to talk to someone who understands.


----------



## lucy123 (Sep 5, 2010)

I bet you by Friday she will have lots of new friends!!


----------



## bev (Sep 5, 2010)

Hi there - your daughter will be fine I am sure. There will probably be 'teething' problems until both her and the school get used to a routine that suits everyone - but after that she will be fine. Do you have a care plan with the school? I found this was the best way to iron out any worries and we update it as necessary. My son was starting year 7 last year after being on a pump for just 10 days - so I do know how worried you are feeling. Just make sure your daughter knows that she can go to the medical room any time she wants to and that the school will phone you if they or she is worried. Let us know how it goes.Bev


----------



## Lilac_Rainbow (Sep 5, 2010)

Hi Bev,
 No Care plan no, I am not sure how much they even know about her really, however strange that sounds. I told some staff when we went to visit the school but they said that the school nurse liases with the hospital (not that the hospital have said anything similar to me) and they also said that her hypo stop box and meter will be kept in the nurses room.

I am now reluctant to contact the school next week with regards to the diabetes, firstly because I don't want to seem like a worrying overbearing Mum and most of all because I almost don't want to remind them because I want her to keep her meter with her. She has only had diabetes for less than five months and in the very few hypo's she's had (being lower than 4), once or twice, when she has had her mind elsewhere, she hasn't even noticed until she was about 3.2 and starting to slur and feel really rough. She is not used to lows yet and I would really like her to be able to test as and when she likes without having to go to the other side of the school to do it, does that sound unreasonable???

I have packed her spare meter as I know eventually it will get taken off her and carted to the nurses room and I have packed her some hypo stop stuff. 

I dread to think what I would be like if I had been in your Position Bev, I am only glad she doesn't need to inject in school, I couldn't bear it if she had been new to a regime, her diabetic nurse refuses to change anything in the last few weeks of the holidays and the first week or so of school though because of the changing routines, so I am really glad of that tonight.


----------



## bev (Sep 5, 2010)

Please dont feel that you being an overbearing mum! Your not! Our school have a training day at every start of the school year because things can change etc. I feel you should have a care plan in place so it helps the school to understand what they should be doing and to make your daughter feel safe in school. I would *absolutely* insist on her keeping her test kit with her and all her hypo kit - she should not be walking to the medical room if hypo as its a hazard for both her and the school. Alex carries his in his school bag and when doing P.E. the teacher keeps hold of it for him. He never goes anywhere without it.
If the school nurse hasnt been in touch with you or the school I would think that they havent really started the process of a care plan - so if I were you I would find out the name of the nurse and ring her tomorrow and ask when she plans to do this. Is your daughter on mixed insulins? I dont know a lot about them - but Adrienne will be able to help you with that one. I hope I am not making you worry even more than you were before - but it is essential that you have a care plan in place.Bev


----------



## Twitchy (Sep 5, 2010)

Hiya...

I totally agree with Bev - and I personally think the school is being totally unreasonable even suggesting that she be separated from her meter or hypo treatments - I can only assume that they don't really understand diabetes or how serious hypos can be.  I've been diabetic since infancy, and certainly in secondary school I always carried my testing kit & hypo treatments on me - and that was back in the early '90s.  I too went to a different school from most of my friends, but you soon form new ones 

If I were you I'd definitely make contact with the school, I don't think you are being over bearing at all.  I'm sure everything will be fine, and hopefully you will both find the transition a lot smoother than you think, but it makes sense to plan ahead & make sure everyone is signing from the same hymn sheet as it were...

Best of luck, and do let us know how she gets on - I'll be thinking of you both! 

Twitchy x

ps - is the nurses room even staffed full time?... and what do they do with asthmatics?  Surely they don't make them walk to get their inhalers?...might be worth making that point!


----------



## Monica (Sep 5, 2010)

My daughter is going into year 9 this year, but I remember very well how worried I was before she started big school.
I didn't need to worry though, as the school nurse contacted me before the summer hols and we went to meet her and discuss everything regarding C's diabetes. C does have her insulin, machine and her glucose tabs in her school bag. She also has a spare insulin cartridge and pen in the school fridge in case she forgets to pack hers in the morning. Glucose tabs and biscuits are available to her at reception too. (That reminds me to get her spare insulin ready for her to take to school).

As everyone said she'll be fine. Even if there are not many (if any at all) of her old friends in her class, she'll soon make new ones who will look out for her.

Insist she has her stuff with her at all times and that she's allowed to test wherever she might be at that time.

Good luck x x


----------



## Jenny Bear (Sep 6, 2010)

My daughter started yr 9 last week, a month after diagnosis, so she is lucky that she already has friends but she is wary about telling anyone but her closest friends.  the school were really good and we were met on her first day by her head of year and went somewhere private altogether to talk about her needs and what the school can do to help.  She is allowed to keep her things on her at all times which is something I insisted on as she is in the honeymoon period and has some odd readings at times and unexplained hypos etc.  I would really reccommend making contact with your daughter's head of year and asking to see her to talk about your daughter's needs etc.  And if you are not happy, your diabetic nurse should help with any school issues.
I still find it hard to "let her go" which is entirely normal as it all seems a bit new still.  You'll get there!
Jenny Bear


----------



## Twitchy (Sep 7, 2010)

Hiya - how'd it go?

Hope all went smoothly & the school are being supportive in all the right ways!


----------

