# Angry daughter



## Cainzy (Aug 11, 2022)

My daughter is diagnosed type 1 have been now for 8 months finding it very hard at the moment daughter is just not taking her condition seriously thinking she can eat when and what she wants it’s putting a strain on family life everything is involved around my daughter and when I try to talk to her it’s like it is a battle and always ends with me shouting I no it’s not good to get angry but I’m just worried that something bad is going to happen in the future if she doesn’t start to take things seriously.


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## mindii (Aug 11, 2022)

I’m so sorry to hear that battle lines feel like they’ve been drawn . How old is your daughter? X


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## Cainzy (Aug 11, 2022)

mindii said:


> I’m so sorry to hear that battle lines feel like they’ve been drawn . How old is your daughter? X


She’s only 10.


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## Pumper_Sue (Aug 11, 2022)

Cainzy said:


> My daughter is diagnosed type 1 have been now for 8 months finding it very hard at the moment daughter is just not taking her condition seriously thinking she can eat when and what she wants it’s putting a strain on family life everything is involved around my daughter and when I try to talk to her it’s like it is a battle and always ends with me shouting I no it’s not good to get angry but I’m just worried that something bad is going to happen in the future if she doesn’t start to take things seriously.


Your daughter can eat what she wants and when, just as long as she takes insulin to cover it.


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## helli (Aug 11, 2022)

I assume your daughter has Type 1.
It is possible to eat what I want when I want as long as I manage my blood sugar levels.
I am not sure whether focussing  on food and making it something a ten year old cannot eat is a good idea. For me, it would make me hate my diabetes more and may lead to an eating disorder.
I have chosen to focus on managing my levels by learning how my body reacts to food and insulin.


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## Sally71 (Aug 11, 2022)

We had pink doughnuts to celebrate my daughter’s 10 year anniversary of diabetes.  Your daughter and mine can eat whatever they like as long as they carb count it and inject the right amount of insulin.  Your daughter might be rebelling because she’s suddenly realised that this really is for the rest of her life, but it doesn’t have to be as bad as she thinks.  Could you work together with her and show her that she can still have her treats?


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## mindii (Aug 11, 2022)

Cainzy said:


> She’s only 10.


Aw that totally sucks! I was the same age at diagnosis.(it wasn’t yesterday ) I remember being really scared cause I was handed a syringe  and told I’d need them every day for the rest of my life. I also remember my parents being terrified about doing something wrong with counting/weighing food. It’s a lot for all involved. I think (don’t know if you guys do this) if your daughter has as much responsibility for her diabetes (obvs with you over seeing it) and together working out what works for her to keep her levels in a safe space it might help her to realise that she still has control?


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## Lucyr (Aug 11, 2022)

What are you saying when you are shouting at her, are you restricting what she can eat? Your daughter can eat when and what she likes, same as before diagnosis. It’s good to get some balance in the diet just the same as it was pre diagnosis, but no foods are off limits. She probably needs you to help with adjusting her insulin to cover the food but that’s it.


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## Inka (Aug 11, 2022)

Are you carb counting @Cainzy ? Is the issue that your daughter is eating extra snacks between meals or is it something like her wanting more at a meal when you’ve already counted the carbs? Does your daughter truly understand that she/you need to do the job of a pancreas because she no longer makes the crucial insulin? It’s a hard thing to get your head round at any age.

Have you spoken to her team? Do they have support for her? Hard as it is, try not to pass your stress and fears onto her. Try to be sympathetic but matter of fact about things. It’s still early days for her emotionally.


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## Thebearcametoo (Aug 12, 2022)

10 is a hard age as there are lots of hormones going round as well as growth spurts and dealing with the diabetes. 

My kid is 12 and was diagnosed just before age 9. We’ve had some difficult times and some times where we’ve got our team’s psychologist involved. 

Practical stuff. We do big meals including pudding so nothing is restricted. This cuts down on the need for snacks. If snacks are needed then they’re needed. There’s a lot of calorie need at this age and it’s normal to need lots of food including carbs. 

I have THE most stubborn child in the world so fighting doesn’t work. It’s much better for us to try to work together and to reduce the stress around food as much as possible for all our sakes. I rant with friends so that my stress is dealt with away from my kid. We’re here if you need to offload. The pre puberty and puberty stage is hard.


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## Cainzy (Aug 12, 2022)

Good afternoon thank you to everyone that replied back with some good advice I certainly will look at things a lot different now and try and speak with her team the support that we thought we would get is not there as every time we’ve spoken to them we get the same line that there short staffed or cancel appointments that are scheduled it just seems we’re having to cope with this ourselves now know that there is this group that I can come to and get some really good advice thank you again.


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