# What would you do?



## Lynna (Jun 7, 2015)

My T1 13 year old daughter has been offered foreign residential trip with the school next year. She is keen to go, although it would be a massive step for her- not just because of her diabetes, but is coeliac and suffers from anxiety. She has been on a residential trip once before in this country and they were on the phone at least twice a day with lows highs and everything in between! 
If it was your kid, what would you do?
(I have to admit I am terrified!)

Lynn


----------



## HOBIE (Jun 7, 2015)

Hi Lynna. Kids whoed ev em ! As a parent you need to be thick skinned at times. I really don't know how my parents put up with me. Out on windsurfer/catamaran/ jetski for hours. Been around the Bass Rock on a Ski (6 miles out). Been out on catamaran the weekend Mr Fish said it was not going to be windy   I know its hard but they have to grow up.  Good luck


----------



## Sally71 (Jun 7, 2015)

My instinct would be that you have to let them grow up and also I don't want my daughter to think that diabetes is going to stop her from doing things.  I dread my daughter going away anywhere, I worry myself sick while she's away but of course she has a fab time.  She's only just turned 9 though and we haven't had to deal with foreign school trips yet so I can understand your worry!

How does your daughter manage her medical conditions normally?  If she's getting fairly good at it then you probably don't have much to worry about; just make sure you go through everything with the staff who will be going with her, and make sure she takes plenty of supplies (at least double what you would expect her to use).

Hope you can work out a plan and that she has a fab time!


----------



## Lynna (Jun 7, 2015)

Thanks all. I don't want to hold her back and if it was just the diabetes, I don't think I would be so concerned. She is quite shy and anxious so I worry that she wouldn't speak up when things are not going well. 
If she wants to go, she will but I know I will be on stand by with my bag packed ready to jump on the next plane. I may even look in to holidays at the same time (same place lol!).


----------



## KookyCat (Jun 8, 2015)

Could you talk to her Lynna, about how she'll handle it, a sort of bargain if you see what I mean.  Tell her gently that you want her to go and enjoy herself but you'd like to know that she's confident enough to let people help?  So between now and next year you want her to try some things she's concerned about now (going into a shop on her own or managing her diabetes at a birthday party, or whatever would be appropriate).  Some baby steps really but in the direction of a bit more confidence.  I was a very shy child and that approach helped me.  It might also help her transition into more confident self care.  Of course the hard part is finding situations she can handle that don't make her feel more anxious or set her up for failure.  Does she have a sensible friend who could be back up?  My youngest nephew is his friends diabetes buddy and his friend is his asthma buddy, it works very well, nephew is very confident and his friend a little shy so together they cover the bases.  Friend carries spare inhaler, nephew spare meter and strips and jelly beans.  It's really very sweet but most importantly they both get a confidence boost knowing the other one is there for backup.  

I don't have kids, and wasn't diabetic as a child but I can imagine that the hardest part must be the independence issue, so I hope it goes well


----------



## Copepod (Jun 8, 2015)

Starting point is she's keen to go, and there's a year in which to prepare, so no reason why she shouldn't go. She'll be 14 next year, so will be more mature, although teenage years are never easy.

As others have mentioned, you and she can break down the features necessary to enjoy the residential trip into small things. 

Eg Day trip managing her own diabetes.

Meanwhile, research together things like foods in the country she's going to visit, vocabulary for foods, especially gluten and sugar related [eg so she can recognise diet soft drinks, as they can taste identicalto full sugar drinks, while carbohydrate in general is less difficult to spot], meal times etc. Concentrate on what she will gain from the trip, rather than the potential problems. 

How old was she when she went on residential trips in UK, and how long since diagnosis? It's likely that she will have gained more experience / confidence since then.


----------



## Lynna (Jun 14, 2015)

Thanks all. 
She has decided not to go at all. Her decision, not influenced by me at all, I promise.
None of her friends wanted to go on the trip she favoured and she didn't want (us) to spend money on a trip she wasn't keen on, so she decided not to go anywhere. Some of her other friends were not going anywhere either. 

I am secretly relieved -she didn't know about my worries, but also a bit sad. But she will get another chance next year and may decide to go for it.

(I have tried to post this reply 3 times now, so if it appears multiple times I apologise!)

Lynn


----------



## HOBIE (Jun 14, 2015)

"Kids" whoed ev em !  It does get worse  Good luck next time


----------

