# Whats wrong with people????



## sasha1 (Jun 1, 2009)

Hi all,

Well, this morning I decided to go to the supermarket...thought nice hot day what better to make for Nathan than a fresh fruit salad. Off I go....nice happy smile...etc.
Get to the supermarket only to be met by a sea of the most miserable faces I've ever seen in my life...Now I realise people may have alot going on in their lives, stresses, problems etc...But does it really cost that much to smile...come on if they try it, they might like it.
Food shopping I must admit does'nt fill me with the joys of spring...but hey its got to be done.
I always smile at people, in return they look at me as if I've just passed wind...sorry..I'm always polite..please and thank you etc...It's free.. Even when I've had a crap day etc..I still can do it.
Quiet frankly if you are this miserable there should be a law banning you from going out..until you get a happy face..
Come on a smile brightens your day up, makes you feel better and cheers others up....not in this case though today
Whats wrong with them....or is a smile a secret code for something....

Heidi


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## insulinaddict09 (Jun 1, 2009)

I totally agree with you on this Heidi , it costs nothing to smile and be polite and respectful to people . Afterall Laughter is The Best Medicine lol


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## Caroline (Jun 1, 2009)

hello Heidi, I don't think some people could be happy if they tried. I try to smile at people and be polite towards them. 

Part of their problem is they don't have the support of all the wonderful  people on these forums, the other part is they don't realise just how lucky they are and we do!


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## Northerner (Jun 1, 2009)

I've lived in my current house for 8 years, but it's only in the last few months that my one of my close neighbours has actually responded to my 'good morning'. Some of the people I used to work with would 'blank' me outside of work! I really, really couldn't understand that at all! I remeber a friend of mine being offended when a checkout lady called him 'love' when I lived in Sheffield.

You're right, it doesn't cost anything and it makes the world a far better place to live in. One of the reasons I would hate to leave my current house is that there are so many people in the local area that are more than willing to smile and greet, or have a little chinwag about the weather.

Something I found interesting when I was in Russia was that it was a characteristic of them to appear dour and miserable - but once you got to know them they were the warmest, friendliest of people, so maybe it's a cultural thing with some people. If you wanted to get the attention of staff in a shop or restaurant you *had * to be rude to them or they would ignore you! 

My mum used to complain that I went around 'scowling' all the time - something I was entirely unaware of and have done my best to rectify over the past 35 years!

One of the things I love to see on this site is how, some people who came here feeling frightened, upset and alone can be transformed by the support and advice they receive - this is how humans should be, caring, friendly, polite and considerate with good humour and an appreciation of how tremendous the gift of life is.


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## Caroline (Jun 1, 2009)

I know quite a few people who get very upset by being called love ducks sweetheart missus mister or any other term along those lines. I don't mind them. On one occaison I had been out when big boy was little. We were on our way home feeling rather knackered and decided to get a black cab from our station. The driver was a jolly feloow and said come on mum let me help you, well I am a mum, he was being nice and helpfull and I was glad of the help. The femmenist behind had a go at him, so I told her to go away and mind her own business since she was too annaly retentative to recognise a good deed when she saw one (well not exactly in those words, but you get the picture)

These days it is nice to be offered a seat on the train or the bus. I will accept and sit greatfully or decline as gracefully as I can saying I'm not going far or only a couple of stops. 

If we all made an effort to small and be bicer to people, everyone would be happier.


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## Einstein (Jun 1, 2009)

I've spent years mastering this guise of being miserable middle aged so 'n' so, now I am here I plan on staying here!

Seriously though its a reflection of how society seems to have changed or be changing... courtesy, costs nothing, brightens yours and the other persons day, might cost you a second.

Sure we can't go bouncing around as happy as Tigger all the time, but we can most of the time - can't we?

The one way to catch the rough side of me is to call me 'Dave'! 'hun' or 'babe' are other terms that make me cringe and clench my jaw. But Dave will usually provoke a comment from me, or a growl.

 There you have a smile off me!


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## sasha1 (Jun 1, 2009)

Hiya,

I must say I use hun..loads...love,sweetie,etc.... I mean it in the nicest of ways..although not everyone likes it...Must admit the one I hate is 'Doll and Darl'...
I think me using the above phrases is when I spent a good few years working behind bars and nightclubs

Heidi


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## bev (Jun 1, 2009)

If you see someone without a smile - give them one of yours! Bev


If i was feeling really down and someone like you smiled at me Heidi, it would make my day - so dont stop smiling Heidi! Bev


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## insulinaddict09 (Jun 1, 2009)

Einstein said:


> The one way to catch the rough side of me is to call me 'Dave'! 'hun' or 'babe' are other terms that make me cringe and clench my jaw. But Dave will usually provoke a comment from me, or a growl.
> 
> There you have a smile off me!



Whoops , I tend to call some people Babe or Sweetie but not all the time 

And a pet hate of mine is shortening peoples names , unless they do it 

themselves  Ha I dont think Ive ever called you Babe though David .

I think we should all smile more , there is always someone worse off than 

you !!! We should all remember that .


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## Einstein (Jun 1, 2009)

insulinaddict09 said:


> Whoops , I tend to call some people Babe or Sweetie but not all the time
> 
> And a pet hate of mine is shortening peoples names , unless they do it
> 
> ...


 
Anne-marie, most things you call me couldn't be put on here 

Seriously though, no, you've never called me Babe or Dave Thanks! 

_*See correction to this post next but one!*_


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## insulinaddict09 (Jun 1, 2009)

Einstein said:


> Anne-marie, most things you call me couldn't be put on here
> 
> Seriously though, no, you've never called me Babe or Dave Thanks!



Hey thats sounds bad !!!! I am only ever ladylike with you David !!!! And I 

always call you David .  I might mumble a few choice phrases now though !!!


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## Einstein (Jun 1, 2009)

insulinaddict09 said:


> Hey thats sounds bad !!!! I am only ever ladylike with you David !!!! And I
> 
> always call you David .  I might mumble a few choice phrases now though !!!


 

Not intended to sound bad, sorry Anne-marie 

I forgot you weren't from where you live!


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## insulinaddict09 (Jun 1, 2009)

Einstein said:


> Not intended to sound bad, sorry Anne-marie
> 
> I forgot you weren't from where you live!



Ok then I accept the " sorry " as I do hate to bear a grudge 

Yes never forget I am pure Southern through and through .


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## Caroline (Jun 2, 2009)

Made two tourists happy this morning. I travel from Woolwich Arsenal (south of the Thames to Kings Cross and work just across the road from St. Pancras Station.

Two middle aged gentlemen carrying cases were looking very lost and asking people for help at Bank. There are 5 different lines to choose from when changing at Bank so it can be very confusing if you are unfamiliar with the system.

They wanted to go to Victoria, which is on the Victoria Line, and not a line that you can get on at Bank. Showed them the map, this is the line you want. If you get on the Central Line (showed them the direction for the Central Line) you change at Oxford Circus, if you go on the Northern Line (showed them the direction for the Northern Line) you change at Kings Cross (which comes first) or Euston (next stop from Kings Cross). They opted for the Northern Line because that is the way I was going. When we got off at Kings Cross, they were two happy men and making their way towards The Victoria Line.

They had already asked several other people for directions who couldn't be bothered or didn't want to know, and it didn't take me long to point them in the right direction.

Made me realise if we all tried to help each other a little more, the world would be a nicer place.


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## insulinaddict09 (Jun 2, 2009)

Caroline said:


> Made me realise if we all tried to help each other a little more, the world would be a nicer place.




Yes that is very true Caroline , if we were all a little nicer to people the world 

would be a better place


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## mikep1979 (Jun 2, 2009)

i love the saying a smile is contagious. i do believe that if you make the effort then the majority of folks will do so to.


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## insulinaddict09 (Jun 2, 2009)

mikep1979 said:


> i love the saying a smile is contagious. i do believe that if you make the effort then the majority of folks will do so to.



Yes very true mike


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## Caroline (Jun 2, 2009)

one of my favorite quotes is 

the best present of all is a hug, one size fits all and no one minds if it's exchanged.


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## mikep1979 (Jun 2, 2009)

i often take a book of hugs with me when i go to family functions and stuff and hand them out saying it is only redemable if you smile lol. works a bloody treat to


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## runner (Jun 2, 2009)

I'm with you all on the common courtesy front, I felt relly annoyed that the teachers at my children's school insisited pupils hold the door open for them, but didn;t expect to return the courtesy.  Young people are human beings too and also deserve respect.





Caroline said:


> I know quite a few people who get very upset by being called love ducks sweetheart missus mister or any other term along those lines. I don't mind them. On one occaison I had been out when big boy was little. We were on our way home feeling rather knackered and decided to get a black cab from our station. The driver was a jolly feloow and said come on mum let me help you, well I am a mum, he was being nice and helpfull and I was glad of the help. The femmenist behind had a go at him, so I told her to go away and mind her own business since she was too annaly retentative to recognise a good deed when she saw one (well not exactly in those words, but you get the picture)


I would say I'm a feminist, but probably not in the way you've come to think of the word, now the media have done with it!  Think you're absolutely right in telling her where to get off!  It's the courtesy and consideration that's important.  I have no objection to being called 'love' 'dear' 'babe' 'my woman' etc. It's part of my culture for people to do this (Saaaf London, now Norfolk)  I just reply 'thanks sweetie'!  I think men are great and have suffered too because of sexism.  And as for stupid regulations saying workmen can't wolf-whistle - Pah! It's the only time I got any appreciation! LOL  The only current term that seems to have become acceptable to call one's other half that I detest is 'bitch'


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## mikep1979 (Jun 2, 2009)

i always call ladies huni., love, sweetie etc and have found that no one really takes offence to it same as most blokes dont mind being called mate and some dont mind dude either. i still like to appretiate a nice looking woman when she walks down the street and find if you just oogle her she will feel a tad uncomfortable so i tend to do a little whistle for them. if they dont like it then they will normally tell you and you can appologise for it. as for feminists i think they are a bunch of !"?$%^&*() and they need to let go a little.

i have nothing wrong with a woman being strong and independant etc but when they start to try and run someone else's life cos they didnt like what someone said to the other person then i think they need to just back off.

i have no problems with women wolf whistling at me (alas this happens less and less nowadays) and feel like when men do it to women it is just a way of showing appretiation for fine form.


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## runner (Jun 2, 2009)

mikep1979 said:


> as for feminists i think they are a bunch of !"?$%^&*() and they need to let go a little.
> 
> i have nothing wrong with a woman being strong and independant etc but when they start to try and run someone else's life cos they didnt like what someone said to the other person then i think they need to just back off.



Aww Mikep, you don't hate me really do you? I think feminism is great - not only do I get to do most of the housework, but now I get to clean the car, and dig the garden too! 

No, seriously, for me it means equal pay for equal work, and equal rights under the law - for both men and women, including the right for men to care for their children and work in the caring professions.  I agree with your sentiment above.

What I don't like is when me and my husband agree on a style of double glazing, and that I would invite round some salesmen (or should that be salespeople LOL) and decide which company to go for, because I'm less susceptible to sales patter, and had a bit more time on my hands.  Then the salesmen ask to talk to my husband, when I phone, until I reassure them I am perfectly capable of discusing it and making a decision! Then, when the salesman comes, he virtually ignores me and addresses all his questions etc to my husband, until my husband points out that it's me he needs to talk to, bevause I'm the one organising the whole thing!


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## Caroline (Jun 2, 2009)

I don't have a lot odf time for hard and fast femmenists. I agree with equal pay for equal work, holding open doors is a matter of good manners., and is good for safety reasons too. While it is nice to be offered a seat on the bus or the train it is not my right to expect it as the gentlemen have been at work too.

By nature men and women are designed to carry out different functions, so we are never going to be exactly the same. We are no better and no worse, just different.

In our house we have just had a bit of role reversal, my husband has retired so will be doing household chores while I will be the breadwinner.


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## mikep1979 (Jun 2, 2009)

runner said:


> Aww Mikep, you don't hate me really do you? I think feminism is great - not only do I get to do most of the housework, but now I get to clean the car, and dig the garden too!
> 
> No, seriously, for me it means equal pay for equal work, and equal rights under the law - for both men and women, including the right for men to care for their children and work in the caring professions.  I agree with your sentiment above.
> 
> What I don't like is when me and my husband agree on a style of double glazing, and that I would invite round some salesmen (or should that be salespeople LOL) and decide which company to go for, because I'm less susceptible to sales patter, and had a bit more time on my hands.  Then the salesmen ask to talk to my husband, when I phone, until I reassure them I am perfectly capable of discusing it and making a decision! Then, when the salesman comes, he virtually ignores me and addresses all his questions etc to my husband, until my husband points out that it's me he needs to talk to, bevause I'm the one organising the whole thing!



i dont hate feminists as a rule, just the hard ass ones who take things a little to far. i am all for equality in the work place and also agree with the argument for women to be allowed to serve on the front line of war if they are up to the task (i understand the political side of this not being good, but why is it easier for the world to see a man return home from war in a box than it is for them to see a woman??)

i would love to see a fair and equal society for all, but i am a realist to and know this will not happen anytime soon lol.

i agree that some sales folk need to go back to school over the whole mister makes choices thing, but i know my mum uses this to get away from them as she will say i cant decide anything without the hubbys say so (she does infact have total control of the finances).


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