# Teens should not be left to self care



## Redkite (Aug 6, 2015)

*From "The Power Within" by Stephen Ponder MD FAAP CDE*

MEDICAL DIRECTOR'S CORNER

I worked with the oldest boys and girls last week in Session 1. This week I'm in full medical director mode. I want to make a strong statement to all parents here: as bright, delightful, insightful and intelligent as your sons and daughters are, NONE OF THEM ARE PREPARED TO TAKE ON THE FULL RESPONSIBILITY OF DIABETES SELF CARE YET.

This has nothing to do about their intelligence, motivation or enthusiasm. It has to do with emotional maturity. These are the true "muscles" needed to manage type 1 diabetes. These kids all exude the physical capabilities of self care: checking a blood sugar, taking an injection or stating what a carb is. But when it comes to the heavy lifting of problem-solving and trouble-shooting, parents must still rule.

If you have been advised to turn the reins over to your teen, you have been misled. That's a strong statement I know, but I do believe it. I have decades of experience in this area.

However, if you DO feel it is alright to allow full self care independence for your teen with diabetes, while you're at it, you might also ask them to manage your 401(k) too...after some mentoring, ...or drive the family car, ...or pay the family bills each month. These tasks pale in comparison to managing a chronic disease, right?

If you've had a teen who slipped into DKA when managing themselves, this illustrates this point of lack of readiness.

So...please don't confuse physical capability with the emotional maturity needed to make the literally HUNDREDS of self care choices required each day to optimally manage diabetes. In the end, it's all about family teamwork.

Your teen with diabetes might be able to sit in the "cockpit of self control", but only in the co-pilot seat for now. You must still occupy the left seat. And if you're being told otherwise, just review the collective body of research of my good friend Dr. Barbara Anderson, who coined the term "shared responsibility" to describe this proactive self care practice I'm describing and advocating.

Your med staff may bring this matter up at check out. I hope you listen to their constructive comments. We are all about setting up these kids to succeed. Let's not undermine that with expectations they are not yet ready or able to live up to and sustain.

Share, share, share, those self care duties


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## Ralph-YK (Aug 6, 2015)

Speaking as a 50 years old, I need someone to be proactive in my case.


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## HOBIE (Aug 15, 2015)

Speaking as someone who has done it  "why not"  If you have got the brains to look after yourself.  Everyone has to grow up


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