# Mum to diabetic teen



## Carla Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

Hi! I'm a mum of 2. My eldest, nearly 13, has Type 1 Diabetes  (since 2010). Along with a couple of other medical conditions.


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## Lynn Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

Hi and welcome to the forum. There are some others who have teenage children so you won't be alone


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## Carla Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

Thanks


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## Northerner (Mar 10, 2016)

Carla Davies said:


> Hi! I'm a mum of 2. My eldest, nearly 13, has Type 1 Diabetes  (since 2010). Along with a couple of other medical conditions.


Hi Carla, welcome to the forum  How are they getting along with things, and what insulin regime are they on?


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## Carla Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

He's on an insulin pump (since last September ), which uses novarapid. He struggling at the moment. He's fed up with diabetes (amongst other things).


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## Northerner (Mar 10, 2016)

Carla Davies said:


> He's on an insulin pump (since last September ), which uses novarapid. He struggling at the moment. He's fed up with diabetes (amongst other things).


Sorry to hear he's struggling  It's a difficult age for anyone, let alone someone with Type 1, and I think we all go through our periods of getting diabetes burnout  Does he know anyone else with diabetes? I'd suggest having a look at the Children with Diabetes website - they have quite a few Facebook groups which can help put both you and your son in touch with others - as well as this forum, of course!


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## Carla Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

Not yet. But I'm working on it.  I will do thanks. I have just contacted our local support group through his diabetic nurse this week. Thanks, I'll have a look in a min.  .... just followed the link, it's one of the websites I looked at today, am waiting a reply from them


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## Lynn Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

I really feel for the young teens who are 'different' to the norm. They all like to fit in with their peers and any slight difference is seen as something to be ridiculed. You only have to have ginger hair to be different!

I did find that the youngsters in the college (16+) were more open about their condition and they all knew who else was diabetic as well.

They just had all the other teen hang ups as well!


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## Carla Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

> You only have to have ginger hair to be different!


He has ginger hair too! And he is very tall due to a condition call Marfan's Syndrome. (Suffering with chronic pain at the moment) . So it's a super whammy, he had enough of it all. Hopefully when he starts having friends with diabetes, he'll start feeling a bit better. And not so alone.


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## Lynn Davies (Mar 10, 2016)

We had one lad in college with Marfan. Took a few weeks but he soon found a group of friends and settled down.

I still don't understand why people with ginger hair get ridiculed. People pay a fortune to have their hair died ginger *shrugs*


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## trophywench (Mar 10, 2016)

Well even being thought of by one's peers as 'brainy' can be a problem these days.

A forum friend's daughter had to become a good actress when she was about 12, since she was very bright so also got it sussed quickly - rarely put her hand up in class etc so as not to be noticed - and acted as thick as the others out of class - just did the work and excelled in her exams.

I remember being horrified when she was telling me all about it - her dad was actually furious that she had to do this - but he'd seen how she was when she first went to senior school and was picked on, so they just had to keep cool, and talk to her about what she COULD do, to try and prevent the bullying.

Dreadful.


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## KookyCat (Mar 11, 2016)

Carla Davies said:


> He has ginger hair too! And he is very tall due to a condition call Marfan's Syndrome. (Suffering with chronic pain at the moment) . So it's a super whammy, he had enough of it all. Hopefully when he starts having friends with diabetes, he'll start feeling a bit better. And not so alone.



Poor chap, he must be thoroughly fed up, its hard enough standing out from the crowd when you're that age, but having the diabetes on top must be making him feel very hard done by.  I'm a tall red head (well not so red anymore it's faded) and when you just want to blend in its very difficult.  I was the super tall, ginger bendy girl at school and blimey that was a challenge, so I feel for him.  I don't know if this helps but, in a weird way it actually helped me, by the time I was 18 I'd realised that I'm different (in many ways) and people just had to get over it, but I had some help with that.  Do you know about the tall person's club?  I used to be a member (lapsed of late) but that's very useful too even if just for practical things like clothes, seats on airplanes etc.  I used to go to events and a fair number of attendees at that point had Marfans (I was cleared for Marfans to the surprise of my consultant, but do have Ehler Danlos which is an associated condition, same gene different expression of the mutation I believe).  The website has changed but I think it's this http://www.tallclub.co.uk, check it out first though just in case.  I think they do Twitter and Flickr and Facebook these days so that might be good for him to check out.

I was a late bloomer for type 1 so I didn't have the diabetes to contend with, but chronic pain on its own is a lot to deal with so the combination of that with the diabetes might mean he needs professional support, he should be able to access that via his diabetes team (psychological support) but you might have to push hard.  I hope he finds some support and it gets a bit easier for him when he finds other people who understand how he feels.


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## Redkite (Mar 11, 2016)

Welcome to the forum Carla.  I have a 15yo type 1 son (diagnosed aged 4) - the teenage years are quite a challenge!  If you're looking for a good support group on Facebook, "CWD - Main Group" is the best one.  There is also a group "Parents of Type 1 Teens".


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## Redkite (Mar 11, 2016)

trophywench said:


> Well even being thought of by one's peers as 'brainy' can be a problem these days.
> 
> A forum friend's daughter had to become a good actress when she was about 12, since she was very bright so also got it sussed quickly - rarely put her hand up in class etc so as not to be noticed - and acted as thick as the others out of class - just did the work and excelled in her exams.
> 
> ...



This was true back in my day (secondary school late 70's, early 80's), and still the same today.  Being good academically and getting high marks in tests etc attracts negative comments from peers....so you have to pretend to be dumber than you are and make out you haven't worked/revised at all.  Maybe it's part of the culture of this country in valuing brainless celebs like Kim Kardashian and never holding up intelligent people as role models?


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## KookyCat (Mar 11, 2016)

Redkite said:


> This was true back in my day (secondary school late 70's, early 80's), and still the same today.  Being good academically and getting high marks in tests etc attracts negative comments from peers....so you have to pretend to be dumber than you are and make out you haven't worked/revised at all.  Maybe it's part of the culture of this country in valuing brainless celebs like Kim Kardashian and never holding up intelligent people as role models?



And mine, and still is, its the same at work really, although not quite as blatant.  We're a strange old bunch aren't we!


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## Redkite (Mar 11, 2016)

KookyCat said:


> And mine, and still is, its the same at work really, although not quite as blatant.  We're a strange old bunch aren't we!



It's something that would be good to change - why do we as a society glorify people who excel at sport or music, but not those who are brilliant in academic fields?


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## SB2015 (Mar 11, 2016)

Hi Carla

Welcome to the forum.  There is a lot for your son to deal with, and I hope that the suggested links will give him others that he can keep in contact with. 

 How would he feel about attending a Care Event for teenagers?  There are a a variety of events all over the country, so there may be something in your area.  If you look on the DUK website there are links to Care events and they are targeted at different age groups. (Sorry I do not know how to put the link in the message to get you to the item.  Someone else might be able to help and that is another question I will be asking on here so that I can do it).

I have found that when I am in a lot of pain I need more insulin.  This is easy to do on the pump by using a temporary Basal rate and this can help to keep levels on target, and so help to feel a lot better physically and so better emotionally.  However it is another thing for your son to do.

I hope that you and he find something that will help him.


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## trophywench (Mar 11, 2016)

@SB2015  - to post a link you go to the top left hand of the page you wish to link to - where eg this page we are on says

~https://forum.diabetes.org.uk/boards/threads/mum-to-diabetic-teen.58051/#post-584252~

which you go to with your cursor, right click it when it highlights those words and info and a drop-down menu appears, choose 'Copy' then go back with your cusor to the post you are making, where you right click again and choose 'Paste'.

https://forum.diabetes.org.uk/boards/threads/mum-to-diabetic-teen.58051/#post-584252

Voila!


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## Carolg (Mar 12, 2016)

Hi carla and welcome to the forum.hope the forum helps you to support your son and supports you if you need it too (if that makes sense)


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## Carla Davies (Mar 24, 2016)

KookyCat said:


> Poor chap, he must be thoroughly fed up, its hard enough standing out from the crowd when you're that age, but having the diabetes on top must be making him feel very hard done by.  I'm a tall red head (well not so red anymore it's faded) and when you just want to blend in its very difficult.  I was the super tall, ginger bendy girl at school and blimey that was a challenge, so I feel for him.  I don't know if this helps but, in a weird way it actually helped me, by the time I was 18 I'd realised that I'm different (in many ways) and people just had to get over it, but I had some help with that.  Do you know about the tall person's club?  I used to be a member (lapsed of late) but that's very useful too even if just for practical things like clothes, seats on airplanes etc.  I used to go to events and a fair number of attendees at that point had Marfans (I was cleared for Marfans to the surprise of my consultant, but do have Ehler Danlos which is an associated condition, same gene different expression of the mutation I believe).  The website has changed but I think it's this http://www.tallclub.co.uk, check it out first though just in case.  I think they do Twitter and Flickr and Facebook these days so that might be good for him to check out.
> 
> I was a late bloomer for type 1 so I didn't have the diabetes to contend with, but chronic pain on its own is a lot to deal with so the combination of that with the diabetes might mean he needs professional support, he should be able to access that via his diabetes team (psychological support) but you might have to push hard.  I hope he finds some support and it gets a bit easier for him when he finds other people who understand how he feels.


Hi! Thanks. Sorry only just seen your message. I didn't have any notifications about it. I'll look into that tall group, sounds good. Especially as he's nearly 13 and already into mens long trousers! He sees a counsellor every week or every other. Not sure if it helps.


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## Carla Davies (Mar 24, 2016)

Redkite said:


> Welcome to the forum Carla.  I have a 15yo type 1 son (diagnosed aged 4) - the teenage years are quite a challenge!  If you're looking for a good support group on Facebook, "CWD - Main Group" is the best one.  There is also a group "Parents of Type 1 Teens".


Sorry for late reply. Thanks, I've recently joined that one and another, can't think what that one's called.


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## Carla Davies (Mar 24, 2016)

SB2015 said:


> Hi Carla
> 
> Welcome to the forum.  There is a lot for your son to deal with, and I hope that the suggested links will give him others that he can keep in contact with.
> 
> ...


Thanks.  I think he'd be nervous. But it's something he needs to do. I'm hopefully going to a local parents meeting early April, so they may have something in place..I'll have a look on the DUK website though too, thanks. His diabetic nurse mentioned about doing that, but I'm nervous about doing it other then for after something like swimming as his readings drop again by his meal times. We see his nurse again next week. I've done more tweaking with some settings. Will see tomorrow if it helps. Then I'll let the nurse decide what else to do about his morning spikes.
(We've been waiting months for physio, after they discharged him [when they shouldn't of!], that appointment is next month so hopefully they'll help him too).


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