# The top 10 biblical ways to acquire a wife



## nicky_too (Mar 16, 2009)

THE TOP 15 BIBLICAL WAYS TO ACQUIRE A WIFE

1. Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her head,trim her nails, and give her new clothes. Then she's yours. -(Deuteronomy 21:11-13)

2. Find a prostitute and marry her. - (Hosea 1:1-3)

3. Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by watering hisflock.- Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)

4. Purchase a piece of property, and get a woman as part of the deal.・・Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)

5. Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to dance, grab oneandcarry her off to be your wife. - Benjaminites (Judges 21:19-25)

6.Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note: this will costyou. - Adam (Genesis 2:19-24)

7. Agree to work seven years in exchange for a woman's hand inmarriage.Get tricked into marrying the wrong woman. Then work another sevenyears for the woman you wanted to marry in the first place. That'sright. Fourteen years of toil for a wife. - Jacob (Genesis 29:15-30)

8. Cut 200 foreskins off of your future father-in-law's enemies and gethis daughter for a wife. - David (I Samuel 18:27)

9. Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you'lldefinitely find someone. (It's all relative, of course.) - Cain(Genesis 4:16-17)

10. Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest. ・・Xerxes or Ahasuerus (Esther 2:3-4)

11. When you see someone you like, go home and tell your parents, "Ihaveseen a woman; now get her for me." If your parents question yourdecision, simply say, "Get her for me. She's the one for me." ・・EURム瘢齒(Judges 14:1-3)

12. Kill any husband and take HIS wife (Prepare to lose four sons,though). - David (2 Samuel 11)

13. Wait for your brother to die. Take his widow. (It's not just a goodidea; it's the law.) - Onana and Boaz (Deuteronomy or Leviticus,example in Ruth)

14. Don't be so picky. Make up for quality with quantity. - Solomon (1Kings 11:1-3)

15. A wife...NOT! - Paul (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)


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## Einstein (Mar 16, 2009)

Ok, that's how you get them, now how do you return them?


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## Northerner (Mar 16, 2009)

So, *that's* where I've been going wrong!


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## insulinaddict09 (Aug 22, 2009)

: Hmm but how to get a b/friend ??


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## rmn58 (Aug 22, 2009)

insulinaddict09 said:


> Hmm but how to get a b/friend ??



If you find out, will you let me know too?


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## insulinaddict09 (Aug 22, 2009)

rmn58 said:


> If you find out, will you let me know too?



Ok I'll get back to you on that one  If you find out let me know !! lol


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